ШИКАРН-О

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♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪

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♪ Humble folks

without temptation ♪

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♪ Goin' down to South Park,

gonna leave my woes behind ♪

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♪ Ample parking day or night ♪

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♪ People spouting,

"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪

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♪ Heading on up to South Park,

gonna see if I can't unwind ♪

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Mrph rmhmhm rm!

Mrph rmhmhm rm!

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♪ Come on down to South Park

and meet some friends of mine ♪

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What the heck?

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Whoa!

What a huge package!

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"To: Butters Stotch."

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Oh, boy! It's for me!

It's for me!

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Who is it from?!

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"Sent from: Japan.

Konichi-wa!"

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Wow!

A package for me from Japan!

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Wow.

What could it be?

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My birthday

isn't until September 11th!

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Oh, boy! I've never gotten

a package this big.

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I've always wanted to have

a huge package!

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Aah!

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Greetings.

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I am the A.W.E.S.O.M.-O 4000.

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Whoa.

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I have been sent from Japan

to serve as your personal robot.

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You -- You're my robot?

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Yes.

I will be your new best friend.

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Oh, wow!

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Yep, that's right.

He's a real, live robot.

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He can walk and talk

and everything!

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You're like the fourth kid

I've told already!

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Well, I got to go, Dougie.

My robot and I have stuff to do.

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They're all so jealous.

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I'm so glad

you came into my life, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

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You're the best friend

a guy could have.

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Yes.

You can trust A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

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In fact,

you should tell A.W.E.S.O.M.-O

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all your most personal secrets.

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A.W.E.S.O.M.-O will not make fun

of you

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or tell your secrets

to other people and stuff.

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Hey, yeah!

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Well, I can tell you anything,

huh?

00:02:02,206 --> 00:02:03,165

Well, let's see.

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Well, for one,

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I have what's called

a heshiated colon,

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which means I sometimes

can't control my sphincter.

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Really?

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Nobody knows it,

but sometimes I poop my pants.

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So I have to wear a diaper

to school.

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You okay, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

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Yes. A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is fine.

Please go on.

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Well, I have to take medicine

for it every day.

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It's a little suppository

I have to put up my rectum.

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That --

That's very interesting.

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Tell A.W.E.S.O.M.-O more secrets.

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Oh, okay.

Let's see.

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Oh, my parents don't know,

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but sometimes I get picked on

by this one kid at school.

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His name is Eric Cartman,

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and he always tries to

play jokes on me and stuff.

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- Oh? Really?

- Yeah!

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One time he made me think

a meteor had hit the earth

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and convinced me to stay down in

a bomb shelter for three days.

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Wow. That sucks.

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Yeah.

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And then this other time,

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he pretended to be me

on the phone to my dad

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and called him a pussy.

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And so my dad came home

and beat me.

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Wow.

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Sounds like this Cartman kid

is pretty smart.

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No, he's not smart.

He's just an asshole.

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And he's never gonna play

a trick on me ever again!

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Really?

You think so?

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Well, guess what, Butters.

I have a surprise for you.

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Yeah, and he's never

gonna get me again,

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'cause what Cartman doesn't know

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is that I know

one of his secrets.

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What?

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When Cartman is playing

all alone in his backyard,

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he likes to dress up

like Britney Spears

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and pretend he's her.

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He sings and dances around

with a life-size cutout

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of Justin Timberlake.

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You saw that?

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Yeah!

And I videotaped him doing it!

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Nunh-unh.

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I've got the whole thing

on tape --

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even him making out with

the Justin Timberlake cutout.

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- No way.

- Yeah!

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And if Cartman

ever messes with me again,

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I'm gonna show that video

to everybody.

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Then I'll have my revenge,

boy howdy!

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Um, where is this videotape,

Butters?

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Huh? Oh, I don't know.

It's around here somewhere.

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Hey, so what do you want to do

now, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

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Uh, Butters, maybe you should

give A.W.E.S.O.M.-O the videotape.

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How come?

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Well, because A.W.E.S.O.M.-O can,

like, back it up for you

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and make copies and stuff.

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I am A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

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Oh, that's all right, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

Come on!

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I have a lot of things

to teach you!

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Oh, son of a bitch.

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♪ Hey, there, have you

heard about my robot friend? ♪

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♪ He's metal and small

and doesn't judge me at all ♪

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♪ He's a cyber-wired

bundle of joy ♪

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♪ My robot friend ♪

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♪ I like to dip and daddle

with my robot friend ♪

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♪ He's smart as can be

and emotion-free ♪

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♪ And he's computed his way

to my heart ♪

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♪ My robot friend ♪

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♪ My robot friend ♪

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♪ My robot friend ♪

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♪ My robot friend ♪

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Oh, that's so cute.

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Did you see Butters and his

friend Eric playing robot?

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Yes. Those boys

are quite imaginative.

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Leave it to them to find

a fun way to do the dishes.

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That's great, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

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You can carry all my laundry

in one trip!

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Uh, Butters, it's getting late.

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You should be getting ready

for bed soon.

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Okay, Mom.

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Well, come on, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

Bedtime.

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Oh, is your little robot friend

staying the night?

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Well, of course he is.

He's my robot, ain't he?

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That's okay with your mom,

Mr. Robot?

00:05:06,056 --> 00:05:07,599

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O does not have a mom.

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Yep. Don't you know

nothin' about robots?

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Come on, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

You can put my laundry away.

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Oh, that's just adorable!

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It's good to see Butters

finally have a friend

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that wants to stay over.

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♪ I love to brush my teeth ♪

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♪ In the morning and at night ♪

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Ugh. Jesus

Christ. I can't go on like this.

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Butters, remember when you said

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you had a video of Eric Cartman

dressed like Britney Spears?

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Oh.

Yeah?

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I would like to see

what he looks like

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so I can beat him up for you.

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May I see the video?

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Aw, you don't need to do that,

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

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Hey, I got to put in my

suppository. Can you help me?

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What?

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Remember I said

I had to put that

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medicinal suppository

in my anus?

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It'll be so much easier

having you do it from now on.

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Um...actually...

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A.W.E.S.O.M.-O was not programmed

for that function.

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Aw, it's real easy.

I'll show you.

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You just take this little thingy

out of the plastic paper.

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And then I'll --

I'll pull down my pants.

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And just slide it

up in my anus there.

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No way.

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A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

I thought you were programmed

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to do whatever I tell you.

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Weak.

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Yeah.

That -- That's pretty good.

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Get it up there good and deep.

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Lame.

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All right, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

Time for us to get some sleep.

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Hey, you want me to teach you

some bedtime songs?

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♪ If you leave me now ♪

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♪ You take away

the biggest part of me ♪

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♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh -- ♪

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A.W.E.S.O.M.-O must rest his CPU.

System overloading.

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Oh.

Oh, all right, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

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Let's get us some shut-eye --

or whatever robots have.

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Where is it?!

Where is it?!

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- A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

- Ah!

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A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, what the Sam heck

are you doing?

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Um, A-A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is reorganizing

your stuff for you.

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Oh, cheese geez Louise!

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My mom is gonna be awful sore

when she sees this mess!

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Now, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

that is a bad robot!

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You can't do no chores for me

unless I tell you to do them.

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You got it?

00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:06,510

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O understands.

00:07:06,635 --> 00:07:08,554

I'm gonna have to give you

a spankin', A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

00:07:08,679 --> 00:07:10,264

so that you learn better.

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And just know, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, that I

did it because I love you.

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Okay. Come on.

Let's go make some breakfast.

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God damn it.

I have to find that videotape!

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Look at that, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

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I drew a picture of us

playing in a field together.

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I'll be right back.

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I'm gonna go get

some Sunny Delight.

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I would like

some Sunny Delight, too.

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Don't be silly, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

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Robots don't need to drink

nothin'.

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Oh!

Go answer the door, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

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A.W.E.S.O.M.-O will answer the door.

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What the hell are you doing,

fat-ass?

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Dude, are you still pretending

to be a robot?

00:07:49,386 --> 00:07:50,220

Shh!

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I just need to, uh,

make Butters think I'm a robot

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for a little while longer.

00:07:54,016 --> 00:07:54,975

Why?

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Because I need to, all right?!

00:07:56,643 --> 00:07:57,853

I've got something planned

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that's, uh, going to be

really sweet.

00:07:59,563 --> 00:08:00,814

Just play along, okay?

00:08:00,939 --> 00:08:02,274

Why?

00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:05,152

- Kyle, God damn it. Will you --

- Who's at the door, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:08:07,529 --> 00:08:10,324

Three boys

named Stan, Kyle, and Kenny.

00:08:10,449 --> 00:08:13,118

Oh, hey, fellas!

I see you've met my robot.

00:08:13,243 --> 00:08:14,578

Uh, yeah, Butters.

He's real cool.

00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:15,704

He sure is!

00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,206

We do everything together.

00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:19,958

Last night,

we even had a slumber party.

00:08:20,542 --> 00:08:21,335

Weak.

00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:23,170

He can do anything

I command him to.

00:08:23,295 --> 00:08:24,880

He's real smart.

Watch this.

00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:27,799

Hey, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, will you go get

my friends some Sunny Delight?

00:08:27,925 --> 00:08:29,551

Yes.

Of course.

00:08:31,261 --> 00:08:32,221

Oh, wait.

00:08:32,346 --> 00:08:34,473

Hey, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

I'd also like some celery sticks

00:08:34,598 --> 00:08:35,641

chopped up two inches long

00:08:35,766 --> 00:08:38,268

with peanut butter and raisins

on top.

00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:41,063

Suck my balls, Kyle.

00:08:41,605 --> 00:08:44,233

He's made in Japan!

00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:45,859

Yes, it has just been a delight

00:08:45,984 --> 00:08:47,694

having your son over,

Mrs. Cartman.

00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:49,988

He and Butters are really

getting along great.

00:08:50,113 --> 00:08:51,990

Oh, I'm so glad to hear it,

Mrs. Stotch.

00:08:52,115 --> 00:08:54,493

Eric has been having

some emotional problems lately.

00:08:54,618 --> 00:08:55,786

Well, the reason I'm calling

00:08:55,911 --> 00:08:57,371

is that Butters

is supposed to go see

00:08:57,496 --> 00:08:59,206

his Aunt Nellie in Los Angeles

this weekend.

00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:00,999

The boys are getting along

so well

00:09:01,124 --> 00:09:03,919

that we were thinking of

inviting Eric to go along.

00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:05,837

Oh.

Well, I'm not sure.

00:09:05,963 --> 00:09:08,173

Actually, Eric is still

supposed to be grounded

00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:10,884

for trying to exterminate

the Jews two weeks ago.

00:09:11,009 --> 00:09:13,178

Excuse me?

I didn't catch that.

00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:15,097

Oh, but I suppose

it would be good for him.

00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:16,223

Yes.

Of course he can go.

00:09:16,348 --> 00:09:17,641

I'll bring

some of his clothes over.

00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:19,935

Oh, wonderful!

The boys will be so excited.

00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:22,354

Maybe he put that videotape

in here somewhere.

00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:23,730

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, what are you doing?

00:09:23,855 --> 00:09:25,566

My friends are waiting

for their beverages.

00:09:25,691 --> 00:09:26,817

Chop-chop!

00:09:26,942 --> 00:09:28,485

Hey, guys!

Great news!

00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:29,695

It's all been arranged --

00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:31,363

You two are both going

to Los Angeles

00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:33,031

to visit Butters' Aunt Nellie!

00:09:33,156 --> 00:09:36,076

Oh, boy! My robot gets to come

with me to see Aunt Nellie?!

00:09:36,201 --> 00:09:36,910

What?

00:09:37,035 --> 00:09:38,161

Oh, boy, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

00:09:38,287 --> 00:09:40,414

We're gonna have

the best time ever!

00:09:40,539 --> 00:09:41,957

Lame.

00:09:46,461 --> 00:09:47,629

Hey, Nellie.

00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:49,798

Look what I found

scrampin' around the airport.

00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:50,882

Hi, Aunt Nellie!

00:09:51,008 --> 00:09:52,759

There's my little nephew!

00:09:52,884 --> 00:09:54,928

- How was your flight?

- It was long.

00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:56,805

We had a three-hour delay

departing Denver,

00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:57,848

but we're here!

00:09:57,973 --> 00:09:59,099

Didn't you bring any bags?

00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:01,059

Well, sure, but my robot

is bringing them in.

00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:02,227

Your robot?

00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:04,396

Butters' new friend

is a little strange.

00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:07,649

He -- He really takes

playing robot seriously.

00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:11,403

There he is!

00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:13,113

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

this is my Aunt Nellie.

00:10:13,238 --> 00:10:15,115

Hello!

It's nice to have you here!

00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:17,618

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O must dispense

oil waste.

00:10:17,743 --> 00:10:19,411

Where is the nearest toilet,

please?

00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:21,580

Oh, right through there,

Mr. Robot.

00:10:21,705 --> 00:10:23,540

Thank you.

00:10:23,665 --> 00:10:26,293

I don't think he took

the costume off the entire trip.

00:10:26,418 --> 00:10:28,128

Did you want to get

right to sightseeing,

00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:30,130

or are you boys hungry

after such a long flight?

00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:31,673

Naw.

I ate on the plane.

00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:34,051

And A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is a robot,

so he don't need to eat.

00:10:34,176 --> 00:10:35,302

Right.

00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:42,893

Oh! Oh!

00:10:48,190 --> 00:10:49,816

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:51,193

Uh -- Uh -- A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is coming.

00:10:51,318 --> 00:10:54,196

Come on, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

We're gonna go a-sightseein'!

00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:01,328

♪ I'm hanging out

in L.A. with my robot friend ♪

00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:04,539

♪ We're havin' such fun

in the hot, hot sun ♪

00:11:04,665 --> 00:11:05,874

♪ We're two of a kind ♪

00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:10,045

♪ That's me

and my robot friend ♪

00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:13,340

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:11:13,465 --> 00:11:15,550

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:11:15,676 --> 00:11:17,844

Can you believe we're at a real,

live movie studio, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:11:17,969 --> 00:11:19,638

Aren't we having the best time?

00:11:19,763 --> 00:11:20,764

Butters, wouldn't you like

00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,641

to have some time away

from A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:11:22,766 --> 00:11:24,226

We could meet up later, perhaps.

00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:26,770

Hey, look over there, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

The film-studio commissary.

00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:28,230

That's where all them

rich movie producers

00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:30,399

that come up with Hollywood

blockbusters have their lunch.

00:11:30,524 --> 00:11:31,692

Neat-o, huh?

00:11:32,317 --> 00:11:33,276

Damn it, Mitch,

00:11:33,402 --> 00:11:35,862

how come our movie studio

can't come up with any winners?

00:11:35,987 --> 00:11:38,490

- I mean, we're smart, right?

- We're really smart.

00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:40,909

We need an idea for a movie

that's a home run --

00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:43,870

a feel-good romp

for the whole family.

00:11:43,995 --> 00:11:45,956

Hey, what's that over there?

00:11:46,081 --> 00:11:48,291

Wow! That's a really neat little

robot you have, little boy.

00:11:48,417 --> 00:11:49,418

What's he do?

00:11:49,543 --> 00:11:51,712

Well, he can do anything!

Watch this.

00:11:51,837 --> 00:11:54,297

Hey, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, who's gonna win

the Super Bowl next year?

00:11:54,423 --> 00:11:56,091

The New Orleans Saints.

00:11:58,468 --> 00:12:00,637

Hey, Mr. Robot, how much wood

would a woodchuck chuck

00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:02,431

if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:03,515

17.

00:12:06,852 --> 00:12:09,438

Mitch, are you thinking

what I'm thinking?

00:12:09,563 --> 00:12:10,480

Yeah.

00:12:10,605 --> 00:12:12,190

Maybe that robot

can be programmed

00:12:12,315 --> 00:12:14,443

to come up with movie ideas!

00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:16,486

Exactly.

00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:18,155

Gentlemen, this little boy

was kind enough

00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:21,074

to let us show you his robot --

the A.W.E.S.O.M.-O 4000.

00:12:21,199 --> 00:12:23,034

I've already seen

what it can do.

00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:26,204

Uh, excuse me, sir,

but, uh, that's not a robot.

00:12:26,329 --> 00:12:27,706

It's not?

00:12:27,831 --> 00:12:29,541

No.

It clearly has bipedal movement.

00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:32,085

So the correct term is

computerized automatron.

00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:34,212

- Oh, very nice, Mitch.

- You are the smart one.

00:12:34,337 --> 00:12:36,882

Well, regardless,

I believe maybe this automatron

00:12:37,007 --> 00:12:39,384

can help us come up with

new movie ideas.

00:12:39,509 --> 00:12:42,637

How can a robot come up with

better ideas for movies than us?

00:12:42,763 --> 00:12:43,638

Watch this.

00:12:43,764 --> 00:12:47,017

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, given the current

trends of the moviegoing public,

00:12:47,142 --> 00:12:48,769

can you come up with an idea

for a movie

00:12:48,894 --> 00:12:51,772

that will break

$100 million box office?

00:12:51,897 --> 00:12:54,566

Um...okay.

How about this?

00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:58,779

Adam Sandler is, like,

in love with some girl.

00:12:58,904 --> 00:13:00,739

But then it turns out

that the girl

00:13:00,864 --> 00:13:04,117

is actually a golden retriever

or something.

00:13:05,619 --> 00:13:07,120

Oh, perfect!

00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:08,538

We'll call it "Puppy Love"!

00:13:08,663 --> 00:13:10,415

Give us another movie idea,

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

00:13:10,540 --> 00:13:11,625

- Yeah!

- Let's hear it!

00:13:11,750 --> 00:13:13,251

- Yeah! We want to hear them!

- Come on! Come on!

00:13:13,376 --> 00:13:14,377

Okay.

How about this?

00:13:14,503 --> 00:13:17,756

A-Adam Sandler inherits

like a billion dollars.

00:13:17,881 --> 00:13:22,761

But first he has to, like,

become a boxer or something.

00:13:22,886 --> 00:13:24,304

Yes!

It's flawless!

00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:26,431

"Punch-Drunk Billionaire"!

00:13:27,057 --> 00:13:29,518

Boy, Los Angeles is great,

huh, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:31,937

Can you believe those guys

paid us $100 apiece

00:13:32,062 --> 00:13:33,647

for those movie ideas?

00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:35,982

You should split that money

with A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:37,692

After all,

they were A.W.E.S.O.M.-O's ideas.

00:13:37,818 --> 00:13:38,902

Oh, right!

00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:40,654

What are you gonna do

with money, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O --

00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:42,322

buy some robot pants?

00:13:42,447 --> 00:13:44,950

No, we've got each other, and

that's all we need, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:13:45,075 --> 00:13:46,159

I'm gonna send this money

00:13:46,284 --> 00:13:48,036

to needy kids

in Third World countries.

00:13:50,247 --> 00:13:51,414

Y-You okay, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:13:51,540 --> 00:13:53,792

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O needs to rest!

Feeling faint!

00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:55,168

You go ahead and relax,

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:13:55,293 --> 00:13:57,921

We've got another full day

of pitching movies tomorrow.

00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:03,009

Gentlemen, ladies,

00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:05,846

we all know that we live

in a time of uncertainty.

00:14:05,971 --> 00:14:08,056

The risk of an attack

on American soil

00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:09,391

is higher than ever.

00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:12,769

Now I believe we might be able

to curb that risk.

00:14:12,894 --> 00:14:17,023

Two days ago, our intelligence

department came across this.

00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,151

The A.W.E.S.O.M.-O 4000.

00:14:20,277 --> 00:14:22,362

It is currently being used

by Catamount Pictures

00:14:22,487 --> 00:14:24,030

to develop ideas for movies.

00:14:24,155 --> 00:14:25,740

Our sources say

that in just one week,

00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:29,369

it has come up with

over 1,000 movie ideas,

00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:31,705

800 of which feature

Adam Sandler.

00:14:31,830 --> 00:14:32,831

- Oh, my God.

- That's amazing.

00:14:32,956 --> 00:14:33,748

Adam Sandler.

00:14:33,874 --> 00:14:34,875

That's incredible!

00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,085

You're thinking

the robot could be used

00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,879

to come up with

anti-Islamic movies?

00:14:39,004 --> 00:14:39,379

No.

00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,339

If we got our hands

on that robot,

00:14:41,464 --> 00:14:45,886

we could reprogram it

and turn it into a weapon.

00:14:46,011 --> 00:14:48,013

Yes. That might be

the best thing to do.

00:14:48,138 --> 00:14:49,681

Uh-huh. I don't see

how we have a choice.

00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:50,724

Hold on a second.

00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:52,475

If that robot is designed

for entertainment,

00:14:52,601 --> 00:14:54,644

then turning it into a weapon

is unethical.

00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:55,687

Unethical?

00:14:55,812 --> 00:14:58,565

Let me explain something to you,

Mr. Scientist.

00:14:58,690 --> 00:15:00,650

We understand that the robot

is from Japan.

00:15:00,775 --> 00:15:03,236

That means that the Japanese

have more of them.

00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:05,864

And if the Japanese fabricates

one of them into a weapon

00:15:05,989 --> 00:15:07,073

before we do...

00:15:07,198 --> 00:15:09,618

Jesus. It would be Pearl Harbor

all over again.

00:15:09,743 --> 00:15:11,912

But worse -- with robots.

00:15:12,037 --> 00:15:13,455

I'm sorry.

I must protest.

00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:16,207

We -- We have no data suggesting

the Japanese have developed

00:15:16,333 --> 00:15:18,001

a robot

with offensive capability.

00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:20,837

You're paid to think,

Mr. Scientist!

00:15:20,962 --> 00:15:23,131

National security is our job.

00:15:26,343 --> 00:15:29,095

Gentlemen, we're going

to Los Angeles.

00:15:29,220 --> 00:15:32,140

I want that robot.

00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:34,434

Yeah, me and my robot

00:15:34,559 --> 00:15:36,436

are still over at

the movie studio, Aunt Nellie.

00:15:36,561 --> 00:15:38,688

We're makin' all kinds

of money for the poor!

00:15:38,813 --> 00:15:42,859

Movie idea number 2,305 --

00:15:42,984 --> 00:15:45,862

Adam Sandler is trapped

on an island

00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:48,823

and falls in love

with a coconut.

00:15:48,949 --> 00:15:49,991

Great, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

Great.

00:15:50,116 --> 00:15:51,034

Guys, take a break.

00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:52,786

I need a minute alone

with A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:15:55,956 --> 00:15:58,458

You are an incredible robot,

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,919

I was just wondering...

00:16:01,044 --> 00:16:04,255

are you by chance

a pleasure model?

00:16:04,839 --> 00:16:05,715

What?

00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:09,636

Well, have you been programmed

to satisfy...

00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:11,972

the urges of humans?

00:16:12,097 --> 00:16:14,182

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O does not understand.

00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:16,559

Let me show you what I mean.

00:16:16,685 --> 00:16:18,520

Yeah, we're having a great time,

Aunt Nellie.

00:16:18,645 --> 00:16:20,480

These movie-studio guys

are real nice.

00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:21,523

Lame!

00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:22,941

Yeah, we're making

a bunch more money.

00:16:23,066 --> 00:16:24,651

I can't believe it either.

00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:27,779

Not cool!

Totally lame!

00:16:27,904 --> 00:16:29,114

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:16:29,239 --> 00:16:30,198

I got to go, Aunt Nellie.

00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:32,742

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is having

some kind of malfunction.

00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:35,120

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

Hey, where'd you go?

00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:45,213

Let's go!

Move! Move!

00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:46,256

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:16:46,381 --> 00:16:47,632

Hey!

What are you doing with him?!

00:16:51,845 --> 00:16:53,096

That's my robot!

00:16:56,558 --> 00:16:59,936

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O-O-O-O!

00:17:08,570 --> 00:17:10,321

Are those arm and leg locks

secure?

00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:11,906

- Secure, sir.

- Good.

00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:13,324

I don't want that robot mobile

00:17:13,450 --> 00:17:15,118

until I know

what it's capable of.

00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,244

All right.

Power it on.

00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:21,875

Wha-whoa-wha-whoa-- Oh!

00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:23,835

- What the hell?

- What's going on?

00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:26,504

It...powered itself back on.

00:17:28,339 --> 00:17:30,592

Stand by.

Be ready to destroy it.

00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:35,013

Where the hell am I?

Hey! Why can't I move?!

00:17:35,138 --> 00:17:36,306

Are your systems stable?

00:17:36,431 --> 00:17:37,974

Run a systems check on your CPU.

00:17:38,099 --> 00:17:39,476

The fuck are you talking about,

dude?

00:17:39,601 --> 00:17:43,188

I-I'm sorry, robot, but they

want me to reprogram you.

00:17:43,313 --> 00:17:45,231

I'm not a robot, dumb-ass!

I'm alive!

00:17:45,356 --> 00:17:46,274

What did you say?

00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:48,651

I said I'm a real person,

ass-wipe!

00:17:49,652 --> 00:17:51,863

Oh, my God.

00:17:51,988 --> 00:17:53,031

What's happening?

00:17:53,156 --> 00:17:56,242

The robot --

It thinks it's alive.

00:17:56,367 --> 00:17:58,661

It's developed consciousness.

00:17:58,787 --> 00:18:00,497

What?

How can that be?

00:18:00,622 --> 00:18:02,582

Must be a malfunction

of its hexagraphical IMS

00:18:02,707 --> 00:18:04,334

or the interlaced B.V. system.

00:18:04,459 --> 00:18:07,670

Speak in a language we can

understand, Mr. Scientist.

00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:10,423

Your robot doesn't know

it's a robot!

00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:12,217

God damn it,

get me down from here.

00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:16,179

Who made you, robot?

00:18:16,304 --> 00:18:18,389

I'm not a robot.

I'm a human!

00:18:18,515 --> 00:18:20,058

Jesus.

The scientist is right.

00:18:20,183 --> 00:18:22,727

But who would have programmed it

to think it was human?

00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:23,770

The movie studio?

00:18:23,895 --> 00:18:26,064

Look, retards,

my name is Eric Cartman!

00:18:26,189 --> 00:18:28,233

I live with my mom

in South Park, Colorado.

00:18:28,358 --> 00:18:30,485

Dear Christ.

They gave it memories, too.

00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:31,528

Sure.

Why not?

00:18:31,653 --> 00:18:33,571

Program the memories

of some eight-year-old boy

00:18:33,696 --> 00:18:36,366

who doesn't exist, and make

the robot think he's real.

00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:38,118

Makes for a lot better movies.

00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:41,663

I'm not reprogramming a robot

that's developed consciousness.

00:18:41,788 --> 00:18:44,082

Do I have to remind you

of your position?!

00:18:44,207 --> 00:18:48,294

Don't forget you have a duty

to your country, Mr. Scientist!

00:18:48,419 --> 00:18:51,756

I want that robot's memories

and consciousness erased

00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:53,466

so we can take it back

to Washington.

00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:54,717

Got it?!

00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:57,887

Damn you all to hell.

00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:03,601

♪ Hey, there, did you know ♪

00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:06,646

♪ I had a robot friend? ♪

00:19:06,771 --> 00:19:09,232

♪ We used to laugh and play ♪

00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:12,152

♪ But someone took him away ♪

00:19:12,277 --> 00:19:17,365

♪ He was my 10-gigahertz

old pal ♪

00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:21,286

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:23,788

Hey, wait a minute.

00:19:25,790 --> 00:19:28,293

Well, that's the van that --

Oh, my God!

00:19:29,460 --> 00:19:32,547

God damn it, stop!

I'm real! I'm real!

00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:35,133

It'll all be over soon, robot!

00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:41,472

Hang on. I'm getting you

out of here, robot.

00:19:41,598 --> 00:19:43,433

Oh, it's about friggin' time,

jackass!

00:19:43,558 --> 00:19:45,518

What the hell are you doing?!

00:19:46,561 --> 00:19:48,813

I-I'm saving a conscious being.

00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:51,399

If you want to kill it,

you'll have to go through me!

00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:54,110

Fine.

Kill that son of a bitch.

00:19:54,235 --> 00:19:55,486

No!

Look, God damn it.

00:19:55,612 --> 00:19:58,114

Now I can show you stupid

assholes who I really am.

00:19:58,239 --> 00:20:00,116

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:03,244

I am the A.W.E.S.O.M.-O 4000.

00:20:05,663 --> 00:20:07,207

No!

No! Please!

00:20:07,332 --> 00:20:09,709

Don't kill him!

He's my best friend!

00:20:09,834 --> 00:20:11,961

He's my best friend

in the whole world!

00:20:12,086 --> 00:20:15,048

He's my...

00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:19,219

There. You see?

00:20:19,344 --> 00:20:21,930

You want to tell me

this isn't humanity?

00:20:22,055 --> 00:20:25,183

Who's to judge what makes

something human, anyway?

00:20:25,308 --> 00:20:27,393

Does this make me human?

00:20:27,518 --> 00:20:28,978

Or this?

00:20:29,103 --> 00:20:30,521

Or these?

00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:36,819

Perhaps...there is consciousness

in this robot.

00:20:36,945 --> 00:20:39,239

Maybe we as a society

need to realize

00:20:39,364 --> 00:20:42,784

that artificial intelligence

is intelligence all the same

00:20:42,909 --> 00:20:45,703

and we can learn

from the robots.

00:20:45,828 --> 00:20:47,497

I think maybe one day

we can all --

00:20:49,457 --> 00:20:52,252

Wait a minute.

Did -- Did that robot just fart?

00:20:52,377 --> 00:20:54,295

Hey, robots don't fart.

00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:56,631

Uh, now ending fart sequence.

00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:58,299

Oh, and it -- it smells, too!

00:20:58,424 --> 00:20:59,926

Smell sequence initiated.

00:21:00,051 --> 00:21:03,179

A robot with smelly farts?

That doesn't make any sense.

00:21:03,304 --> 00:21:05,139

Hang on a second here!

00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:11,396

♪ Would you like to touch

my body? ♪

00:21:11,521 --> 00:21:13,147

♪ Come on and touch my body ♪

00:21:13,273 --> 00:21:14,983

♪ Ooh, my hot body ♪

00:21:15,108 --> 00:21:16,776

♪ Don't you like my hot body? ♪

00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:18,653

♪ Come on and touch my titties ♪

00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:20,655

♪ I've got such nice,

ripe titties ♪

00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:22,615

♪ Come on, Justin,

touch my body ♪

00:21:22,740 --> 00:21:24,450

Ooh, Justin.

Yeah.

00:21:24,575 --> 00:21:26,160

♪ Touch my body, you and me ♪

00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:28,454

♪ Check out my nice, hard body ♪

00:21:28,579 --> 00:21:30,498

♪ Come on, my body ♪

00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:33,209

Wow, kid.

You're a little faggot.

00:21:33,334 --> 00:21:34,836

Lame.

00:00:15,115 --> 00:00:19,630

Вместо этого мы представляем новый

и немного лучший эпизод "З.А.Ш.И.Б.А.Т.О.Р".

00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:44,630

Чего это?

00:00:44,690 --> 00:00:46,270

Вау! Какая огромная коробка!

00:00:47,020 --> 00:00:48,235

"Баттерсу Стотчу. "

00:00:48,270 --> 00:00:50,390

Ох, блин! Это мне! Это мне!

00:00:50,460 --> 00:00:53,535

А откуда? "Из Японии. Конничива."

00:00:53,570 --> 00:00:56,610

Ух ты! Посылка для меня из Японии!

00:00:57,860 --> 00:01:00,540

Ух, что же это?

Мой день рождения 11 сентября.

00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:03,660

Ох, блин! Мне никогда не приходили

такие огромные посылки!

00:01:03,695 --> 00:01:05,930

Я всегда хотел такую.

00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:16,990

Приветствую. Я ЗАШИБАТОР 4000.

00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:20,765

О- о-а...

00:01:20,800 --> 00:01:24,950

Я послан из Японии быть твоим личным роботом.

00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:28,205

Ты... Ты мой робот?

00:01:28,240 --> 00:01:30,780

Да. Я буду тебе новым лучшим другом.

00:01:30,815 --> 00:01:32,430

Ух ты!

00:01:33,250 --> 00:01:35,615

Ну. Так и есть. Он настоящий живой робот.

00:01:35,650 --> 00:01:39,550

Он может ходить говорить и всё такое.

Ты похоже уже четвертый, кому я это рассказываю.

00:01:40,430 --> 00:01:42,830

Ну мне пора уже, Доги.

У нас с роботом есть всякие дела.

00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:45,635

Хе-хе, им всем так завидно!

00:01:45,670 --> 00:01:47,560

Я так рад, что ты появился

в моей жизни, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:01:47,595 --> 00:01:49,450

Ты лучший друг, который может быть у пацана.

00:01:49,590 --> 00:01:51,285

Да. Ты можешь доверять ЗАШИБАТОРу.

00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:54,835

На самом деле ты должен рассказать

ЗАШИБАТОРу все свои личные тайны.

00:01:54,870 --> 00:01:58,830

ЗАШИБАТОР не будет высмеивать тебя или рассказывать

твой секреты другим людям и всё такое.

00:01:58,865 --> 00:02:01,875

Ха да! Я могу тебе что угодно рассказать?

00:02:01,910 --> 00:02:06,370

Так, посмотрим... Ну во-первых, у меня есть то, что называется грыжей толстой кишки,

00:02:06,405 --> 00:02:08,870

это значит что я иногда

не могу контролировать мой сфинктер.

00:02:09,090 --> 00:02:10,340

Такое бывает.

00:02:10,410 --> 00:02:12,700

Ну, никто не знает, но иногда я какаюсь в штаны

00:02:12,735 --> 00:02:13,980

и поэтому я ношу подгузники в школе.

00:02:14,990 --> 00:02:15,940

Всё нормально, ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:02:17,290 --> 00:02:19,540

Да. ЗАШИБАТОР в порядке. Продолжай.

00:02:19,820 --> 00:02:21,835

Ну, поэтому каждый день я принимаю лекарство.

00:02:21,870 --> 00:02:24,580

Это маленькая свечка,

её надо вставлять... в мою прямую кишку.

00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:29,360

Это, это очень интересно.

Расскажи ЗАШИБАТОРу ещё секреты.

00:02:29,510 --> 00:02:32,265

Хмм, хорошо.

Посмотрим, о, мои родители не знают,

00:02:32,300 --> 00:02:35,870

но иногда ко мне пристаёт

один пацан в школе, его зовут Эрик Картмэн,

00:02:35,905 --> 00:02:37,790

и он всегда подшучивает надо мной и всё такое.

00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:39,025

О, правда?

00:02:39,060 --> 00:02:41,490

Да. Однажды он заставил меня думать

что на Землю падает метеорит,

00:02:41,525 --> 00:02:44,160

убедил меня оставаться в бомбоубежище три дня.

00:02:44,270 --> 00:02:46,535

Хе. Вот хреново.

00:02:46,570 --> 00:02:49,315

Ага. А в другой раз он

по телефону притворился мной,

00:02:49,350 --> 00:02:53,100

и назвал моего папу слабаком,

ну и потом мне попало от папы.

00:02:53,135 --> 00:02:56,120

Ух. Похоже, что ребёнок

Картмэн довольно умён.

00:02:56,155 --> 00:02:58,065

Не, он не умён! Он просто мудак.

00:02:58,100 --> 00:03:01,160

И он никогда не будет шутить

над мной никогда больше!

00:03:01,195 --> 00:03:03,625

Правда? Ты так думаешь?

00:03:03,660 --> 00:03:06,060

Знаешь что, Баттерс?

У меня есть сюрприз для тебя.

00:03:06,100 --> 00:03:08,305

Ага, со мной у него

больше ничего не получится!

00:03:08,340 --> 00:03:11,040

Потому что Картмэн не знает,

что я знаю один его секрет!

00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:12,270

Что?

00:03:12,700 --> 00:03:14,545

Когда Картмэн играет один на заднем дворе,

00:03:14,580 --> 00:03:17,910

он наряжается как Бритни Спирс

и танцует как она!

00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:21,060

Он поёт и танцует вокруг фигуры Джастина

Тимберлейка в натуральную величину.

00:03:22,020 --> 00:03:23,450

Ты это видел?

00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:26,050

Ага! И я записал это на видео!

00:03:26,085 --> 00:03:27,210

Не-а.

00:03:27,650 --> 00:03:29,145

У меня всё есть на плёнке!

00:03:29,180 --> 00:03:31,480

Даже как он целуется взасос с

фигурой Джастина Тимберлейка!

00:03:31,515 --> 00:03:32,640

Не может быть.

00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:35,780

Да! И если Картмэн опять

что-нибудь учинит со мной,

00:03:35,815 --> 00:03:38,680

я покажу плёнку всем!

И это будет моя месть, вот так!

00:03:38,715 --> 00:03:41,700

Мм, Где эта плёнка, Баттерс?

00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:44,530

А- а? О, я не помню. Где-нибудь здесь.

00:03:44,565 --> 00:03:46,425

Эй! А что будем делать теперь, ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:49,990

Ну, Баттерс, наверное ты должен

дать ЗАШИБАТОРу эту плёнку?

00:03:50,025 --> 00:03:50,895

Для чего?

00:03:50,930 --> 00:03:51,765

Ну, например...

00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:57,150

ЗАШИБАТОР может сделать копии

и вернуть их тебе. Я ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:03:57,185 --> 00:03:58,355

О, ничего страшного, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:03:58,390 --> 00:04:00,850

Идём! Мне многому нужно тебя научить.

00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:04,230

Вот сукин сын!

00:04:06,620 --> 00:04:09,365

Эй, кто не слышал о моём робо-друге?

00:04:09,400 --> 00:04:12,450

Он из металла и небольшой

и не судит меня ни в чём.

00:04:12,490 --> 00:04:14,780

Он кибер-пачка удовольствия

00:04:15,190 --> 00:04:16,750

Мой робо-друг.

00:04:18,710 --> 00:04:21,620

Мне нравится колбаситься с моим робо-другом.

00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:24,590

Он умён и может быть неэмоциональным

00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:27,990

И он вычислит путь к моему сердцу.

00:04:28,010 --> 00:04:29,570

Мой робо-друг.

00:04:31,180 --> 00:04:40,900

Мой робо-друг.

00:04:41,410 --> 00:04:43,245

О- о это так забавно.

00:04:43,280 --> 00:04:45,410

Смотри, Баттерс и его друг

Эрик играют в робота.

00:04:45,445 --> 00:04:47,395

Да. Эти мальчики весьма изобретательны.

00:04:47,430 --> 00:04:50,030

Оставь это им, пусть они найдут

интересный способ мыть посуду.

00:04:50,680 --> 00:04:51,825

Это здорово, ЗАШИБАТОР!

00:04:51,860 --> 00:04:53,660

Ты можешь нести все

мои стиранные вещи за раз.

00:04:53,790 --> 00:04:55,280

Ах, Баттерс, уже поздно.

00:04:55,315 --> 00:04:56,770

Тебе пора готовиться ко сну.

00:04:56,805 --> 00:04:57,635

Окей, мам.

00:04:57,670 --> 00:04:59,280

Хорошо, идём, ЗАШИБАТОР.

Время спать.

00:04:59,350 --> 00:05:01,480

О- о, твой маленький друг робот

остаётся с тобой на ночь?

00:05:01,515 --> 00:05:03,792

Ну конечно. Он мой робот, разве нет?

00:05:03,827 --> 00:05:06,070

А что скажет твоя мама, мистер робот?

00:05:06,105 --> 00:05:07,825

У ЗАШИБАТОРа нет мамы.

00:05:07,860 --> 00:05:10,120

Ага! Вы что, ничего не знаете о роботах?

00:05:10,155 --> 00:05:12,380

Идём, ЗАШИБАТОР! Положишь мои вещи там!

00:05:12,415 --> 00:05:14,145

Ах, это просто восхитительно.

00:05:14,180 --> 00:05:16,000

Приятно видеть, что Баттерс нашёл себе друга,

00:05:16,035 --> 00:05:18,150

который хочет с ним остаться.

00:05:18,330 --> 00:05:22,190

Мне нравится чистить зубы по утрам и вечерам.

Мои зубы не возражают...

00:05:22,225 --> 00:05:24,467

Рррр. Господи Иисусе,

я не могу больше это продолжать.

00:05:24,502 --> 00:05:26,710

Баттерс, помнишь, когда ты сказал,

что у тебя есть плёнка,

00:05:26,745 --> 00:05:28,870

на которой Эрик Картмэн

наряжается, как Бритни Спирс?

00:05:29,190 --> 00:05:30,325

О. Да.

00:05:30,360 --> 00:05:32,405

Я хочу посмотреть, как он выглядит,

00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:35,480

чтобы избить его для тебя.

Можно я посмотрю кассету?

00:05:35,515 --> 00:05:37,005

Тебе не обязательно это делать, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:05:37,040 --> 00:05:39,370

Эй, Мне нужно вставить свечку.

Ты мне поможешь?

00:05:39,450 --> 00:05:40,465

Что?

00:05:40,500 --> 00:05:43,840

Помнишь я говорил, что я засовываю

медицинские свечи себе в анус?

00:05:43,875 --> 00:05:46,215

Будет намного легче, если это сделаешь ты.

00:05:46,250 --> 00:05:50,270

Мм. На самом деле, ЗАШИБАТОР

не запрограммирован на такую функцию.

00:05:50,305 --> 00:05:51,905

Ха, это просто. Я объясню тебе.

00:05:51,940 --> 00:05:55,925

Ты просто достаёшь эту маленькую

вещичку из упаковки и я,

00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:57,590

я опускаю свои штаны... и

просто всовываешь её туда в мой анус.

00:05:58,350 --> 00:05:59,650

...Ни за что.

00:06:00,570 --> 00:06:03,410

ЗАШИБАТОР, я хочу, чтобы ты был

запрограмирован на всё, что я скажу тебе.

00:06:03,445 --> 00:06:05,570

Стрём!

00:06:06,580 --> 00:06:08,155

Да-да-да, так очень хорошо.

00:06:08,190 --> 00:06:09,500

Всовывай её туда лучше и глубже.

00:06:09,530 --> 00:06:10,390

Отстой!

00:06:10,720 --> 00:06:12,860

Ну хорошо, ЗАШИБАТОР, пора спать.

00:06:13,190 --> 00:06:15,365

Эй, хочешь я научу тебя петь колыбельную?

00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:19,870

Если ты бросишь меня сейча-а-ас,

ты заберёшь с собой мою большую ча-а-асть.

00:06:19,930 --> 00:06:20,790

Ooo-oo-oooo-oo-oo...

00:06:20,970 --> 00:06:21,665

ЗАШИБАТОР должен отдыхать!

00:06:21,700 --> 00:06:24,330

Его центральный процессор перегружен.

00:06:24,365 --> 00:06:26,005

О, хорошо, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:29,330

Давай спать, или что там

роботы делают вместо сна.

00:06:46,100 --> 00:06:47,285

Где он? Где он?

00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:48,470

ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:06:48,505 --> 00:06:49,045

Ох!

00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:51,165

ЗАШИБАТОР, что за херню ты тут творишь?

00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:55,230

М- м, а-а, ЗАШИБАТОР,

реорганизует для тебя вещи.

00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:58,405

Ядрён батон! Моя мама будет в ужасе,

00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:01,305

когда увидит этот беспорядок!

Теперь ЗАШИБАТОР - плохой робот!

00:07:01,340 --> 00:07:04,470

Ты не должен делать никаких домашних работ

для меня, пока я об этом не попрошу! Ясно?!

00:07:04,720 --> 00:07:06,510

ЗАШИБАТОР понял.

00:07:06,630 --> 00:07:10,030

Теперь я должен тебя отшлёпать,

ЗАШИБАТОР, чтобы ты понял лучше!

00:07:12,330 --> 00:07:13,435

Только знай, ЗАШИБАТОР,

00:07:13,470 --> 00:07:15,090

я сделал это, потому что я люблю тебя.

00:07:15,125 --> 00:07:17,060

Окей, идём приготовим завтрак.

00:07:18,390 --> 00:07:20,450

Чёрт возьми, я должен найти эту кассету!

00:07:24,170 --> 00:07:25,195

Смотри, ЗАШИБАТОР!

00:07:25,230 --> 00:07:27,690

Я нарисовал, как мы играем вместе.

00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:31,370

Ах, ну я пойду.

Пойду выпью Санни Делайт.

00:07:31,405 --> 00:07:33,410

Я тоже хочу немного Санни Делайт.

00:07:33,445 --> 00:07:35,402

Не смеши меня, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:07:35,437 --> 00:07:37,360

Роботам не надо ничего пить.

00:07:37,710 --> 00:07:40,580

Эй, открой дверь, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:07:40,615 --> 00:07:43,450

ЗАШИБАТОР откроет дверь.

00:07:46,420 --> 00:07:47,930

Что за фигню ты тут творишь, толстожопый?

00:07:47,965 --> 00:07:49,405

Чувак, ты чё, до сих пор изображаешь робота?

00:07:49,440 --> 00:07:53,760

Шшш! Мне нужно, чтобы Баттерс

думал, что я робот ещё некоторое время.

00:07:54,190 --> 00:07:54,875

Зачем?

00:07:54,910 --> 00:07:56,425

Потому что мне это нужно, понятно?!

00:07:56,460 --> 00:07:59,410

Я тут кое-что планирую

и это будет реально клёво.

00:07:59,445 --> 00:08:00,630

Просто притворяйтесь, окей?

00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:02,260

Зачем?

00:08:02,280 --> 00:08:04,030

Кайл, черт побери,

ты можешь это сделать?

00:08:04,065 --> 00:08:05,600

Кто там пришёл, ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:08:06,470 --> 00:08:10,160

Три пацана: Стэн, Кайл и Кенни.

00:08:10,720 --> 00:08:13,170

А, привет, мужики!

О, вы уже видели моего робота.

00:08:13,205 --> 00:08:14,825

О да, Баттерс, он реально крут.

00:08:14,860 --> 00:08:17,200

Ага, так и есть! Мы всё делаем вместе.

00:08:17,235 --> 00:08:19,540

Прошлой ночью мы даже вместе спали.

00:08:20,740 --> 00:08:21,590

Стрёмно.

00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:23,525

Он выполняет все мои команды.

00:08:23,560 --> 00:08:24,935

Он очень умный. Вот смотрите:

00:08:24,970 --> 00:08:27,750

ЗАШИБАТОР, ты сходишь за

Санни Делайт для моих друзей?

00:08:27,785 --> 00:08:29,250

Да, конечно.

00:08:31,790 --> 00:08:35,045

Погоди. Эй, ЗАШИБАТОР,

я ещё хочу палочки сельдерея,

00:08:35,080 --> 00:08:37,350

нарезаные длинной по два дюйма,

с арахисовым маслом и изюмом сверху.

00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:40,780

Отсоси, Кайл.

00:08:41,660 --> 00:08:43,880

Его сделали в Японии!

00:08:44,680 --> 00:08:47,380

Да, всё просто восхитительно,

и ваш сын, миссис Картмэн,

00:08:47,415 --> 00:08:50,080

они с Баттерсом на самом

деле великолепно проводят время.

00:08:50,115 --> 00:08:52,115

О, я рада слышать это, миссис Стотч.

00:08:52,150 --> 00:08:54,450

У Эрика были небольшие

эмоциональные проблемы в последнее время.

00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:56,625

Ну, причина по которой я

звоню вам, в том, что Баттерс

00:08:56,660 --> 00:08:59,510

едет повидать свою тётю Нелли

в Лос-Анжелес на этих выходных.

00:08:59,545 --> 00:09:01,125

Мальчики так здорово вместе ладят,

00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:03,750

что мы подумали о приглашении

Эрика ехать вместе с ним.

00:09:03,785 --> 00:09:05,885

О, ну я не уверена.

00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,120

Дело в том, что Эрик должен быть наказан

00:09:08,170 --> 00:09:10,790

за попытку истребить

всех евреев две недели назад.

00:09:10,810 --> 00:09:13,165

Прошу прощения, я что-то не уловила.

00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:15,175

О, но я полагаю это пойдёт ему на пользу.

00:09:15,210 --> 00:09:17,770

Конечно, он может ехать.

Я принесу ему одежду.

00:09:17,805 --> 00:09:20,070

О, прекрасно!

Ребята будут в восторге.

00:09:20,820 --> 00:09:22,700

Может он засунул кассету куда-нибудь сюда.

00:09:22,735 --> 00:09:23,865

ЗАШИБАТОР, чего ты делаешь?

00:09:23,900 --> 00:09:26,320

Мои друзья ждут напитки.

Поторопись!

00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:28,675

Эй ребята, прекрасные новости!

00:09:28,710 --> 00:09:32,500

Всё устроено: вы вдвоём едете

в Лос-Анджелес к тёте Нелли!

00:09:32,535 --> 00:09:36,290

Ух ты! Мой робот поедет со мной

повидаться с тётей Нелли?!

00:09:36,325 --> 00:09:36,945

Чего?

00:09:36,980 --> 00:09:38,085

О, блин, ЗАШИБАТОР!

00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:39,950

Это будет самое лучшее время!

00:09:40,090 --> 00:09:41,830

Лажа.

00:09:47,180 --> 00:09:50,100

Эй Нелли, угадай кого я нашёл в аэропорту.

00:09:50,135 --> 00:09:52,142

Здавствуй, тётя Нелли!

00:09:52,177 --> 00:09:54,115

Мой племяшек! Как долетел?

00:09:54,150 --> 00:09:57,170

Это было долго.

Мы задержались на три часа в Денвере,

00:09:57,205 --> 00:09:57,905

но всё равно мы здесь!

00:09:57,940 --> 00:09:59,095

Ты не принёс с собой сумки?

00:09:59,130 --> 00:10:01,080

Ну да, но мой друг робот несёт их.

00:10:01,115 --> 00:10:02,085

Твой робот?

00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:04,915

Новый друг Баттерса немного странноват.

00:10:04,950 --> 00:10:07,710

Он, он очень серьёзно играет в робота.

00:10:08,740 --> 00:10:12,370

Вот и он! ЗАШИБАТОР,

это моя тётя Нелли.

00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:15,645

Привет! Приятно видеть тебя.

00:10:15,680 --> 00:10:17,670

ЗАШИБАТОРу необходимо слить масляные отходы.

00:10:17,705 --> 00:10:19,750

Где здесь ближайший туалет?

00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:21,880

О, о, прямо там, мистер Робот.

00:10:21,915 --> 00:10:22,660

Спасибо.

00:10:24,150 --> 00:10:26,555

Я думаю, что он не снимал

этот наряд всю поездку.

00:10:26,590 --> 00:10:28,160

Ну хорошо, вы отправитесь осматривать

достопримечательности прямо сейчас,

00:10:28,195 --> 00:10:30,250

или покушаете после долгого перелёта?

00:10:30,270 --> 00:10:31,705

Не-а, я ел в самолёте.

00:10:31,740 --> 00:10:34,020

А ЗАШИБАТОР - робот,

он не нуждается в еде.

00:10:34,055 --> 00:10:35,970

Верно...

00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:49,730

ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:10:50,460 --> 00:10:52,065

А- а-ЗАШИБАТОР идёт.

00:10:52,100 --> 00:10:54,420

Пойдём, ЗАШИБАТОР!

Идём на прогулку!

00:10:54,710 --> 00:10:56,560

Агг!

00:10:58,710 --> 00:11:01,400

Я болтаюсь с моим робо-другом по Лос-Анджелесу

00:11:01,435 --> 00:11:04,040

Нам так приятно на горячем солнышке

00:11:04,660 --> 00:11:10,325

Нас двое - Это я!

00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:15,955

И мой робо-друг.

00:11:15,990 --> 00:11:18,360

Ты можешь поверить, что мы в

настоящей студии кино, ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:11:18,395 --> 00:11:19,695

Разве это не замечательно?

00:11:19,730 --> 00:11:22,940

Баттерс, тебе не хотелось бы

ненадолго отлучиться от ЗАШИБАТОРа?

00:11:22,975 --> 00:11:24,430

Мы могли бы встретится позже, возможно?

00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:25,725

Эй, смотри туда, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:28,150

Студийная забегаловка.

Это здесь все богатые продюссеры кино,

00:11:28,185 --> 00:11:30,540

которые придумывают мм,

голливудские блокбастеры, обедают.

00:11:30,575 --> 00:11:31,610

Круто, ага?

00:11:32,610 --> 00:11:35,970

Проклятье, Митч. Почему наша

киностудия не может выбраться в победители?

00:11:36,005 --> 00:11:37,730

Я полагаю мы умные, верно?

00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:38,545

Мы действительно умные.

00:11:38,580 --> 00:11:40,885

Нам нужна идея кино для семейного просмотра.

00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:43,190

Эдакий бесшабашный фильмец для всей семьи.

00:11:44,130 --> 00:11:45,910

Эй, что там такое?

00:11:46,140 --> 00:11:48,580

Вау, это действительно

твой маленький робот, паренёк?

00:11:48,615 --> 00:11:49,465

Что он умеет делать?

00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:51,845

Ну, он всё умеет. Смотрите сюда:

00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:54,410

Эй, ЗАШИБАТОР, кто выиграет

Суперкубок в следующем году?

00:11:54,445 --> 00:11:56,410

Нью-Орлеанс Сэйнтс.

00:11:58,350 --> 00:11:59,405

Эй, мистер Робот,

00:11:59,440 --> 00:12:02,300

сколько палок мог бы бросить сурок,

если бы сурок мог бросать палки?

00:12:02,560 --> 00:12:03,830

Семнадцать.

00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:09,940

Митч, ты думаешь о том же, о чем и я?

00:12:09,975 --> 00:12:10,835

Да.

00:12:10,870 --> 00:12:13,900

Возможно этот робот может быть запрограммирован

на придумывание сюжетов для кино!

00:12:15,350 --> 00:12:16,610

Вот именно!

00:12:16,900 --> 00:12:18,865

Джентельмены, этот

маленький мальчик любезно

00:12:18,900 --> 00:12:21,350

позволил нам посмотреть

его робота, ЗАШИБАТОРа 4000.

00:12:21,420 --> 00:12:23,185

Я уже видел на что он способен.

00:12:23,220 --> 00:12:26,350

Мм, извините меня сэр,

но, мм, это - не робот.

00:12:26,385 --> 00:12:27,600

Не робот?

00:12:28,050 --> 00:12:30,065

Нет, так как ясно

отмечается двуногое движение,

00:12:30,100 --> 00:12:32,370

более правильный термин будет -

"компьютеризированый автоматрон".

00:12:32,405 --> 00:12:33,590

О, очень хорошо, Митч.

00:12:33,625 --> 00:12:34,485

Ты очень умён.

00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:36,985

Хорошо, независимо от этого,

я верю, что, возможно,

00:12:37,020 --> 00:12:39,450

этот автоматрон может

помочь нам придумать сюжеты.

00:12:39,490 --> 00:12:42,830

Как робот может придумать

лучшие сюжеты, чем мы?

00:12:42,865 --> 00:12:43,585

Смотрите сюда:

00:12:43,620 --> 00:12:47,010

ЗАШИБАТОР, учитывая текущие

тенденции киноиндустрии,

00:12:47,270 --> 00:12:51,350

можете ли вы придумать сюжет для кинофильма,

который принесёт сто миллионные кассовые сборы?

00:12:51,380 --> 00:12:54,535

Хм... окей.

Вот например это:

00:12:54,570 --> 00:12:58,935

Адам Сэндлер, к примеру,

влюблён в одну девушку,

00:12:58,970 --> 00:13:02,970

но затем оказывается что эта

девушка на самом деле... голден ретривер,

00:13:03,070 --> 00:13:04,050

или что-нибудь такое.

00:13:06,180 --> 00:13:07,415

О, превосходно!

00:13:07,450 --> 00:13:08,510

Мы назовем это "Щенячья любовь"!

00:13:08,810 --> 00:13:10,595

Давай нам другой сюжет, ЗАШИБАТОР!

00:13:10,630 --> 00:13:12,860

Да да! Мы слушаем!

Да, мы внимательно слушаем!

00:13:12,895 --> 00:13:13,685

Давай, давай!

00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:14,715

Окей, как насчёт этого:

00:13:14,750 --> 00:13:21,140

Адам Сэндлер... наследует миллион долларов,

но вначале ему, к примеру, нужно стать... боксёром,

00:13:21,310 --> 00:13:22,820

или что-нибудь такое.

00:13:22,855 --> 00:13:24,330

...Да это безупречно!

00:13:24,830 --> 00:13:26,270

"Пьянящий миллиардер!"

00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:29,835

Парень, Лос-Анджелес

это круто, так ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:13:29,870 --> 00:13:33,370

Ты можешь поверить, что эти парни

заплатили нам за сюжеты по сто долларов за штуку?

00:13:33,405 --> 00:13:36,170

Ты должен разделить

эти деньги с ЗАШИБАТОРом.

00:13:36,205 --> 00:13:38,375

Тем более, что это

были идеи ЗАШИБАТОРа.

00:13:38,410 --> 00:13:40,670

Хахаха, верно! Что ты будешь

делать с деньгами, ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:13:40,705 --> 00:13:42,075

Купишь штаны для робота?

00:13:42,110 --> 00:13:45,175

Хаха, нет! У нас есть мы

и это всё что нам надо, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:13:45,210 --> 00:13:48,240

Я отошлю эти деньги нуждаюшимся

детям в странах третьего мира.

00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:50,265

Хааааа! Хаааа!

00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:51,805

Ты в порядке, ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:53,990

ЗАШИБАТОР нуждается с отдыхе!

Чувствую слабость.

00:13:54,025 --> 00:13:55,585

Хорошо, иди и

отдохни, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:13:55,620 --> 00:13:57,550

Завтра будет ещё один

день подачи киноидей.

00:14:01,710 --> 00:14:06,070

Джентельмены, леди, мы все знаем,

что мы живём в тяжёлое время неуверенности.

00:14:06,105 --> 00:14:09,310

Риск нападения на американскую землю

выше чем когда-либо.

00:14:09,345 --> 00:14:12,350

Теперь я верю, мы можем

обуздать этот риск.

00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:16,360

Два дня назад наш отдел

исследований натолкнулся на это:

00:14:16,380 --> 00:14:20,365

ЗАШИБАТОР 4000.

00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:24,430

В настоящее время оно используется

Катамаунт Пикчерс для производства идей для фильмов.

00:14:24,465 --> 00:14:26,265

Наши источники сообщают нам,

00:14:26,300 --> 00:14:30,300

что только за одну неделю

оно придумало более чем одну тысячу идей,

00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:31,700

восемьсот из которых с участием Адама Сендлера.

00:14:33,810 --> 00:14:34,870

Это невероятно!

00:14:35,130 --> 00:14:39,180

Вы думаете робота можно использовать,

чтобы тот мог придумать антиисламское кино?

00:14:39,215 --> 00:14:41,435

Нет. Если робот попадёт к нам в руки,

00:14:41,470 --> 00:14:44,840

мы перепрограмируем его

и сделаем из него оружие!

00:14:46,700 --> 00:14:48,320

Да, это лучшее,

что мы можем сделать из него.

00:14:48,355 --> 00:14:49,845

Угу, угу. Я не вижу другого выбора.

00:14:49,880 --> 00:14:53,040

Подождите секунду:

если робот разработан для развлечения,

00:14:53,075 --> 00:14:54,870

превращать его в оружие неэтично.

00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:55,765

Неэтично?

00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:58,395

Позвольте мне объяснить вам

кое-что, мистер учёный!

00:14:58,430 --> 00:15:03,050

Мы понимаем, что робот из Японии!

Это значит, что в Японии их больше!

00:15:03,370 --> 00:15:07,350

И если японцы сделают из одного из них

оружие раньше, чем мы это сделаем...

00:15:07,385 --> 00:15:09,880

Господи. Это будет ещё

один Перл Харбор.

00:15:09,915 --> 00:15:12,070

Но хуже. С роботами.

00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:13,490

Я прошу прощения, я должен возразить.

00:15:13,525 --> 00:15:15,635

У нас нет данных предполагать,

00:15:15,670 --> 00:15:18,230

что Япония производит роботов

с небезопасными качествами.

00:15:18,300 --> 00:15:21,040

Вам платят за то что вы

думаете, мистер учёный!

00:15:21,075 --> 00:15:23,220

Национальная безопасность - наша работа.

00:15:26,590 --> 00:15:28,940

Джентельмены, мы отправляемся в Лос-Анджелес!

00:15:28,975 --> 00:15:31,730

Мне нужен этот робот!

00:15:33,710 --> 00:15:36,650

Да, я и мой робот всё

ещё на киностудии, тётя Нелли.

00:15:36,685 --> 00:15:38,390

Мы делаем деньги для бедных.

00:15:39,150 --> 00:15:42,575

Сюжет номер две тысячи триста пять:

00:15:42,610 --> 00:15:48,790

Адам Сендлер заманен на остров,

где влюбляется в кокос.

00:15:49,050 --> 00:15:50,615

Великолепно, ЗАШИБАТОР, великолепно.

00:15:50,650 --> 00:15:52,870

Так ребята, перерыв.

Мне нужно побыть минутку с ЗАШИБАТОРом наедине.

00:15:56,380 --> 00:15:57,760

Ты невероятный робот, ЗАШИБАТОР.

00:15:57,795 --> 00:15:59,730

Я тут задался вопросом...

00:16:01,380 --> 00:16:02,990

ты случайно не...

00:16:03,060 --> 00:16:04,290

...модель для удовольствия?

00:16:05,410 --> 00:16:06,610

...Что?

00:16:06,730 --> 00:16:09,650

Ну может быть ты был запрограммирован...

на удовлетворение...

00:16:09,685 --> 00:16:11,610

...человеческих потребностей?

00:16:12,580 --> 00:16:14,505

ЗАШИБАТОР не понимает.

00:16:14,540 --> 00:16:16,190

Я покажу тебе,

что я имею в виду.

00:16:17,130 --> 00:16:19,025

Да, мы здорово

проводим время, тётя Нелли.

00:16:19,060 --> 00:16:20,920

Парни на киностудии - просто замечательные.

00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:22,005

Стрём!

00:16:22,040 --> 00:16:22,870

Ага, мы заработали уже пачку денег.

00:16:22,905 --> 00:16:24,480

Я сам не могу поверить в это.

00:16:24,840 --> 00:16:27,540

ОТСТОЙ! ПОЛНЫЙ СТРЁМ!

00:16:28,170 --> 00:16:28,905

ЗАШИБАТОР?

00:16:28,940 --> 00:16:30,695

Ладно, я пойду, тётя Нелли.

00:16:30,730 --> 00:16:32,450

ЗАШИБАТОР что-то засбоил.

00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:35,500

ЗАШИБАТОР?

Эй, куда он пошёл?

00:16:38,930 --> 00:16:40,610

Аааааа!

00:16:44,110 --> 00:16:45,775

Вперёд!

Давай, давай!

00:16:45,810 --> 00:16:49,600

ЗАШИБАТОР?

Куда вы его тащите?!

00:16:52,220 --> 00:16:54,170

Это мой робот!

00:16:56,980 --> 00:17:00,250

ЗАШИБАТОOOOOOOOOOOOOР!

00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:10,720

Руки и ноги хорошо закреплены?

00:17:10,755 --> 00:17:11,665

Хорошо, сэр!

00:17:11,700 --> 00:17:13,770

Хорошо. Я не хочу, чтобы робот мог двигаться,

00:17:13,805 --> 00:17:15,430

пока я не знаю на что он способен.

00:17:15,465 --> 00:17:16,710

Ну хорошо, включай его.

00:17:20,830 --> 00:17:22,010

Хей хей хей хей хей!

00:17:22,330 --> 00:17:23,310

Что за дьявол?

00:17:23,345 --> 00:17:24,255

Что происходит?

00:17:24,290 --> 00:17:26,880

Он... включил сам себя.

00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:31,760

Будь наготове.

Если что - уничтожай.

00:17:32,310 --> 00:17:33,615

Что за херня, где я?!

00:17:33,650 --> 00:17:35,080

Эй, почему я не могу двигаться?!

00:17:35,350 --> 00:17:36,675

Твои системы стабильны?

00:17:36,710 --> 00:17:38,530

Запусти проверку

центрального процессора.

00:17:38,680 --> 00:17:40,120

Что за х... ю ты несёшь, чувак?!

00:17:40,155 --> 00:17:41,475

Э, я сожалею, робот,

00:17:41,510 --> 00:17:43,590

они хотят чтобы я

перепрограмировал тебя.

00:17:43,625 --> 00:17:45,430

Я не робот, ты гавнюк!

Я живой!

00:17:45,465 --> 00:17:47,040

Что ты сказал?

00:17:47,070 --> 00:17:48,920

Я сказал, что я

настоящий, идиот!

00:17:48,955 --> 00:17:51,250

...О, господи.

00:17:52,330 --> 00:17:53,215

Что случилось?

00:17:53,250 --> 00:17:56,060

Робот...

Он думает, что он живой.

00:17:56,095 --> 00:17:58,730

У него развитое сознание.

00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:00,905

Что? Как это возможно?

00:18:00,940 --> 00:18:04,565

Возможно сбой эксографической IMS

или ошибка BV системы.

00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:08,190

Говорите на языке

который мы понимаем, мистер учёный!

00:18:08,225 --> 00:18:10,700

Ваш робот не знает, что он робот!

00:18:11,270 --> 00:18:12,880

Проклятье, спустите меня отсюда!

00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:16,920

Кто тебя сделал, робот?!

00:18:17,050 --> 00:18:18,800

Я не робот, я человек!

00:18:18,835 --> 00:18:20,515

О боже, учёный прав.

00:18:20,550 --> 00:18:23,070

Но кто запрограммировал

его думать, что он человек?

00:18:23,105 --> 00:18:24,140

Киностудия?

00:18:24,350 --> 00:18:26,555

Смотрите тупицы!

Моё имя Эрик Картмэн!

00:18:26,590 --> 00:18:28,550

Я живу с мамой в

Саут-Парке, штат Колорадо!

00:18:28,670 --> 00:18:30,800

Господи, они дали ему воспоминания.

00:18:30,835 --> 00:18:31,835

Несомненно, а почему бы и нет?

00:18:31,870 --> 00:18:34,155

Запрограммировать воспоминания

какого-нибудь восьмилетнего мальчика,

00:18:34,190 --> 00:18:36,440

которого не существует и заставить

робота думать, что он настоящий!

00:18:36,475 --> 00:18:38,365

И создавать лучшие фильмы!

00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:41,920

Я не смогу его перепрограмировать,

у него развитое сознание!

00:18:42,220 --> 00:18:44,185

Мне напомнить о вашем положении?!

00:18:44,220 --> 00:18:47,890

Не забывайте о вашем долге

перед страной, мистер учёный!

00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:52,050

Я хочу СТЕРЕТЬ воспоминания и

сознание этого робота,

00:18:52,085 --> 00:18:54,930

и мы заберём его в Вашингтон!

ТАК ЯСНО?!

00:18:54,980 --> 00:18:58,160

Будьте вы все прокляты!

00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:05,330

Эй, вы слышали, что у

меня был робо-друг?

00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:10,640

Мы смеялись и играли,

но кто-то забрал его.

00:19:12,770 --> 00:19:15,060

Он был моим другом

на десять гигагерц.

00:19:18,180 --> 00:19:21,910

Мой робо-друг.

00:19:22,570 --> 00:19:23,830

Эй, погодите минутку.

00:19:25,830 --> 00:19:27,490

Этот тот фургон...

00:19:27,525 --> 00:19:28,580

О, господи!

00:19:30,190 --> 00:19:33,350

Проклятье, прекратите!

Я настоящий! Я настоящий!

00:19:33,385 --> 00:19:35,640

Это скоро закончится, робот!

00:19:39,770 --> 00:19:41,720

Держись!

Я вытащу тебя оттуда, робот!

00:19:41,755 --> 00:19:43,807

Аа, самое время, ослина!

00:19:43,842 --> 00:19:45,860

Что за хрень тут творится?!

00:19:45,890 --> 00:19:49,025

Хорошо я, я спасаю сознательное существо!

00:19:49,060 --> 00:19:51,510

Если вы хотите убить его,

вам придётся пройти через меня!

00:19:51,540 --> 00:19:54,230

Отлично.

Убейте сукиного сына!

00:19:54,380 --> 00:19:55,965

Нет! Смотрите, черт побери!

00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:58,350

Сейчас я покажу вашим тупым жопам,

кто я на самом деле!

00:19:58,440 --> 00:19:59,690

ЗАШИБАТОР!

00:20:00,420 --> 00:20:03,150

Я ЗАШИБАТОР 4000.

00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:08,530

Нет, пожалуйста!

Не убивайте его!

00:20:08,565 --> 00:20:10,230

Он мой лучший друг!

00:20:10,420 --> 00:20:12,200

Он мой лучший друг в целом мире!

00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:19,085

Вот. Вы видите?

00:20:19,120 --> 00:20:21,825

Вы хотите сказать мне, что это не человечность?

00:20:21,860 --> 00:20:25,490

Кто может судить о том, что делает

человека именно таким, какой он есть?!

00:20:25,530 --> 00:20:27,450

Что делает меня человеком?! Это?

00:20:27,485 --> 00:20:30,820

Или это?! Или это?!

00:20:33,540 --> 00:20:34,895

Возможно...

00:20:34,930 --> 00:20:36,675

у этого робота есть сознание.

00:20:36,710 --> 00:20:40,780

Возможно наше общество должно понять,

что искуственный интеллект...

00:20:41,300 --> 00:20:42,975

такой же интеллект,

00:20:43,010 --> 00:20:45,325

и мы сможем учиться у роботов.

00:20:45,360 --> 00:20:48,240

Возможно когда-нибудь мы все вместе-

00:20:49,990 --> 00:20:51,200

Эй- минутку, что это,

00:20:51,235 --> 00:20:52,410

робот только что пёрнул?

00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:55,290

Эй, роботы не пердят!

00:20:55,710 --> 00:20:57,470

Ох... закончил синтезировать пердеж.

00:20:57,505 --> 00:20:58,700

Оох, и это, это так воняет!

00:20:58,710 --> 00:21:00,340

Инициализирован синтез вони.

00:21:00,375 --> 00:21:01,932

Робот с вонючим пердежём?

00:21:01,967 --> 00:21:03,490

В этом нет никакого смысла.

00:21:03,670 --> 00:21:05,380

Погодите секунду!

00:21:10,250 --> 00:21:13,585

Хочешь потрогать моё тело?

Иди и потрогай моё тело!

00:21:13,620 --> 00:21:17,040

Oooo, моё горячее тело!

Тебе не нравится моё горячее тело?

00:21:17,075 --> 00:21:20,705

Иди и потрогай мои титьки!

Я чуствую то же?

00:21:20,740 --> 00:21:24,540

Давай Джастин, потрогай моё тело!

Мммм, Джастин, да!

00:21:24,575 --> 00:21:28,340

Трогай моё тело! Ты и я!

Зацени моё горячее тело!

00:21:28,375 --> 00:21:30,920

Давай, моё тело!

00:21:31,430 --> 00:21:33,780

Вау, паренёк, да ты маленький гомосек!

00:21:34,100 --> 00:21:36,150

Отстой...

00:00:12,513 --> 00:00:14,015

♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪

00:00:14,140 --> 00:00:15,599

♪ Humble folks

without temptation ♪

00:00:15,725 --> 00:00:18,853

♪ Goin' down to South Park,

gonna leave my woes behind ♪

00:00:18,978 --> 00:00:20,521

♪ Ample parking day or night ♪

00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:22,398

♪ People spouting,

"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪

00:00:22,523 --> 00:00:25,443

♪ Heading on up to South Park,

gonna see if I can't unwind ♪

00:00:25,568 --> 00:00:28,904

Mrph rmhmhm rm!

Mrph rmhmhm rm!

00:00:29,030 --> 00:00:33,242

♪ Come on down to South Park

and meet some friends of mine ♪

00:00:38,622 --> 00:00:40,291

[ Doorbell rings ]

00:00:43,419 --> 00:00:44,503

What the heck?

00:00:44,628 --> 00:00:46,464

Whoa!

What a huge package!

00:00:46,589 --> 00:00:48,007

"To: Butters Stotch."

00:00:48,132 --> 00:00:49,884

Oh, boy! It's for me!

It's for me!

00:00:50,009 --> 00:00:51,093

Who is it from?!

00:00:51,218 --> 00:00:53,679

"Sent from: Japan.

Konichi-wa!"

00:00:53,804 --> 00:00:56,724

Wow!

A package for me from Japan!

00:00:57,475 --> 00:00:58,517

Wow.

What could it be?

00:00:58,642 --> 00:01:00,770

My birthday

isn't until September 11th!

00:01:01,896 --> 00:01:03,689

Oh, boy! I've never gotten

a package this big.

00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:05,816

I've always wanted to have

a huge package!

00:01:05,941 --> 00:01:07,443

[ Grunts ]

00:01:07,568 --> 00:01:08,986

Aah!

00:01:13,324 --> 00:01:14,700

CARTMAN: [ Robotic voice ]

Greetings.

00:01:14,825 --> 00:01:17,870

I am the A.W.E.S.O.M.-O 4000.

00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:20,581

- [ Down-tempo music plays ]

- Whoa.

00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:25,377

I have been sent from Japan

to serve as your personal robot.

00:01:25,878 --> 00:01:27,880

You -- You're my robot?

00:01:28,005 --> 00:01:30,424

Yes.

I will be your new best friend.

00:01:30,549 --> 00:01:31,842

Oh, wow!

00:01:33,511 --> 00:01:35,387

Yep, that's right.

He's a real, live robot.

00:01:35,513 --> 00:01:36,889

He can walk and talk

and everything!

00:01:37,014 --> 00:01:38,516

You're like the fourth kid

I've told already!

00:01:38,641 --> 00:01:40,434

[ Snickering ]

00:01:40,559 --> 00:01:43,187

Well, I got to go, Dougie.

My robot and I have stuff to do.

00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:45,231

[ Chuckles ]

They're all so jealous.

00:01:45,356 --> 00:01:47,525

I'm so glad

you came into my life, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:01:47,650 --> 00:01:49,485

You're the best friend

a guy could have.

00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:51,195

Yes.

You can trust A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:53,072

In fact,

you should tell A.W.E.S.O.M.-O

00:01:53,197 --> 00:01:54,740

all your most personal secrets.

00:01:54,865 --> 00:01:56,408

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O will not make fun

of you

00:01:56,534 --> 00:01:58,869

or tell your secrets

to other people and stuff.

00:01:58,994 --> 00:01:59,995

Hey, yeah!

00:02:00,121 --> 00:02:02,081

Well, I can tell you anything,

huh?

00:02:02,206 --> 00:02:03,165

Well, let's see.

00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:04,250

Well, for one,

00:02:04,375 --> 00:02:06,418

I have what's called

a heshiated colon,

00:02:06,544 --> 00:02:08,629

which means I sometimes

can't control my sphincter.

00:02:08,754 --> 00:02:10,089

[ Snickers ]

Really?

00:02:10,214 --> 00:02:12,341

Nobody knows it,

but sometimes I poop my pants.

00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:14,009

So I have to wear a diaper

to school.

00:02:14,135 --> 00:02:15,469

[ Snickering ]

00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:16,846

You okay, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:02:16,971 --> 00:02:19,640

Yes. A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is fine.

Please go on.

00:02:19,765 --> 00:02:21,767

Well, I have to take medicine

for it every day.

00:02:21,892 --> 00:02:24,603

It's a little suppository

I have to put up my rectum.

00:02:24,728 --> 00:02:27,398

[ Snickers ] That --

That's very interesting.

00:02:27,523 --> 00:02:29,150

Tell A.W.E.S.O.M.-O more secrets.

00:02:29,275 --> 00:02:30,651

Oh, okay.

Let's see.

00:02:30,776 --> 00:02:31,986

Oh, my parents don't know,

00:02:32,111 --> 00:02:34,488

but sometimes I get picked on

by this one kid at school.

00:02:34,613 --> 00:02:35,656

His name is Eric Cartman,

00:02:35,781 --> 00:02:37,825

and he always tries to

play jokes on me and stuff.

00:02:37,950 --> 00:02:39,410

- Oh? Really?

- Yeah!

00:02:39,535 --> 00:02:41,579

One time he made me think

a meteor had hit the earth

00:02:41,704 --> 00:02:44,373

and convinced me to stay down in

a bomb shelter for three days.

00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,083

[ Snickers ]

Wow. That sucks.

00:02:46,208 --> 00:02:46,917

Yeah.

00:02:47,042 --> 00:02:48,043

And then this other time,

00:02:48,169 --> 00:02:50,045

he pretended to be me

on the phone to my dad

00:02:50,171 --> 00:02:51,338

and called him a pussy.

00:02:51,463 --> 00:02:52,965

And so my dad came home

and beat me.

00:02:53,090 --> 00:02:53,883

Wow.

00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:56,093

Sounds like this Cartman kid

is pretty smart.

00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:58,304

No, he's not smart.

He's just an asshole.

00:02:58,429 --> 00:03:01,056

And he's never gonna play

a trick on me ever again!

00:03:01,182 --> 00:03:02,975

Really?

You think so?

00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:05,853

Well, guess what, Butters.

I have a surprise for you.

00:03:05,978 --> 00:03:07,521

Yeah, and he's never

gonna get me again,

00:03:07,646 --> 00:03:08,898

'cause what Cartman doesn't know

00:03:09,023 --> 00:03:11,525

is that I know

one of his secrets.

00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:12,610

What?

00:03:12,735 --> 00:03:14,695

When Cartman is playing

all alone in his backyard,

00:03:14,820 --> 00:03:16,572

he likes to dress up

like Britney Spears

00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:17,740

and pretend he's her.

00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:19,992

He sings and dances around

with a life-size cutout

00:03:20,117 --> 00:03:21,285

of Justin Timberlake.

00:03:22,494 --> 00:03:23,704

You saw that?

00:03:23,829 --> 00:03:26,624

Yeah!

And I videotaped him doing it!

00:03:26,749 --> 00:03:27,625

Nunh-unh.

00:03:27,750 --> 00:03:29,210

I've got the whole thing

on tape --

00:03:29,335 --> 00:03:31,837

even him making out with

the Justin Timberlake cutout.

00:03:31,962 --> 00:03:33,130

- No way.

- Yeah!

00:03:33,255 --> 00:03:34,965

And if Cartman

ever messes with me again,

00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:36,926

I'm gonna show that video

to everybody.

00:03:37,051 --> 00:03:38,677

Then I'll have my revenge,

boy howdy!

00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:42,473

Um, where is this videotape,

Butters?

00:03:42,598 --> 00:03:44,683

Huh? Oh, I don't know.

It's around here somewhere.

00:03:44,808 --> 00:03:46,560

Hey, so what do you want to do

now, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:03:46,685 --> 00:03:50,147

Uh, Butters, maybe you should

give A.W.E.S.O.M.-O the videotape.

00:03:50,272 --> 00:03:50,940

How come?

00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:54,360

Well, because A.W.E.S.O.M.-O can,

like, back it up for you

00:03:54,485 --> 00:03:55,903

and make copies and stuff.

00:03:56,028 --> 00:03:57,196

I am A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:03:57,321 --> 00:03:58,697

Oh, that's all right, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

Come on!

00:03:58,822 --> 00:04:00,908

I have a lot of things

to teach you!

00:04:01,951 --> 00:04:03,369

Oh, son of a bitch.

00:04:03,494 --> 00:04:06,288

[ Tune to Harry Nilsson's

"Best Friend" plays ]

00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:09,291

BUTTERS: ♪ Hey, there, have you

heard about my robot friend? ♪

00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:12,461

♪ He's metal and small

and doesn't judge me at all ♪

00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:15,256

♪ He's a cyber-wired

bundle of joy ♪

00:04:15,381 --> 00:04:19,009

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:04:19,134 --> 00:04:22,179

♪ I like to dip and daddle

with my robot friend ♪

00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:25,307

♪ He's smart as can be

and emotion-free ♪

00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:27,768

♪ And he's computed his way

to my heart ♪

00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:30,980

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:04:31,105 --> 00:04:34,275

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:37,403

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:04:37,528 --> 00:04:40,656

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:04:41,532 --> 00:04:42,825

Oh, that's so cute.

00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:45,286

Did you see Butters and his

friend Eric playing robot?

00:04:45,411 --> 00:04:47,579

Yes. Those boys

are quite imaginative.

00:04:47,705 --> 00:04:49,873

Leave it to them to find

a fun way to do the dishes.

00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:51,792

That's great, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

00:04:51,917 --> 00:04:53,752

You can carry all my laundry

in one trip!

00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:55,087

Uh, Butters, it's getting late.

00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:56,755

You should be getting ready

for bed soon.

00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:57,756

Okay, Mom.

00:04:57,881 --> 00:04:59,258

Well, come on, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

Bedtime.

00:04:59,383 --> 00:05:01,427

Oh, is your little robot friend

staying the night?

00:05:01,552 --> 00:05:03,971

Well, of course he is.

He's my robot, ain't he?

00:05:04,096 --> 00:05:05,931

That's okay with your mom,

Mr. Robot?

00:05:06,056 --> 00:05:07,599

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O does not have a mom.

00:05:07,725 --> 00:05:09,601

Yep. Don't you know

nothin' about robots?

00:05:09,727 --> 00:05:12,604

Come on, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

You can put my laundry away.

00:05:12,730 --> 00:05:13,939

Oh, that's just adorable!

00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:15,733

It's good to see Butters

finally have a friend

00:05:15,858 --> 00:05:17,276

that wants to stay over.

00:05:18,193 --> 00:05:19,570

♪ I love to brush my teeth ♪

00:05:19,695 --> 00:05:21,113

♪ In the morning and at night ♪

00:05:21,238 --> 00:05:24,074

[ Whispering ] Ugh. Jesus

Christ. I can't go on like this.

00:05:24,199 --> 00:05:25,951

[ Robotic voice ]

Butters, remember when you said

00:05:26,076 --> 00:05:28,829

you had a video of Eric Cartman

dressed like Britney Spears?

00:05:28,954 --> 00:05:30,289

Oh.

Yeah?

00:05:30,414 --> 00:05:32,124

I would like to see

what he looks like

00:05:32,249 --> 00:05:33,917

so I can beat him up for you.

00:05:34,043 --> 00:05:35,294

May I see the video?

00:05:35,419 --> 00:05:36,879

Aw, you don't need to do that,

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:05:37,004 --> 00:05:39,381

Hey, I got to put in my

suppository. Can you help me?

00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:40,758

What?

00:05:40,883 --> 00:05:42,301

Remember I said

I had to put that

00:05:42,426 --> 00:05:43,886

medicinal suppository

in my anus?

00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:46,138

It'll be so much easier

having you do it from now on.

00:05:46,263 --> 00:05:47,681

Um...actually...

00:05:47,806 --> 00:05:49,975

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O was not programmed

for that function.

00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:52,061

Aw, it's real easy.

I'll show you.

00:05:52,186 --> 00:05:54,646

You just take this little thingy

out of the plastic paper.

00:05:54,772 --> 00:05:56,523

And then I'll --

I'll pull down my pants.

00:05:56,648 --> 00:05:58,859

And just slide it

up in my anus there.

00:05:59,568 --> 00:06:00,486

No way.

00:06:00,611 --> 00:06:02,154

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

I thought you were programmed

00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,198

to do whatever I tell you.

00:06:04,323 --> 00:06:05,699

Weak.

00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:07,701

Yeah.

That -- That's pretty good.

00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:09,244

Get it up there good and deep.

00:06:09,370 --> 00:06:10,287

Lame.

00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:12,998

BUTTERS: All right, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

Time for us to get some sleep.

00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:15,334

Hey, you want me to teach you

some bedtime songs?

00:06:15,459 --> 00:06:17,044

♪ If you leave me now ♪

00:06:17,169 --> 00:06:19,213

♪ You take away

the biggest part of me ♪

00:06:19,338 --> 00:06:20,547

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh -- ♪

00:06:20,672 --> 00:06:24,051

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O must rest his CPU.

System overloading.

00:06:24,176 --> 00:06:25,844

Oh.

Oh, all right, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:06:25,969 --> 00:06:29,807

Let's get us some shut-eye --

or whatever robots have.

00:06:29,932 --> 00:06:32,559

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

00:06:36,313 --> 00:06:38,774

[ Rooster crows ]

00:06:40,818 --> 00:06:43,195

[ Dramatic music plays ]

00:06:45,364 --> 00:06:47,324

[ Whispering ] Where is it?!

Where is it?!

00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:49,118

- A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

- Ah!

00:06:49,243 --> 00:06:51,120

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, what the Sam heck

are you doing?

00:06:51,245 --> 00:06:55,374

Um, A-A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is reorganizing

your stuff for you.

00:06:55,499 --> 00:06:56,875

Oh, cheese geez Louise!

00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,253

My mom is gonna be awful sore

when she sees this mess!

00:06:59,378 --> 00:07:01,213

Now, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

that is a bad robot!

00:07:01,338 --> 00:07:03,841

You can't do no chores for me

unless I tell you to do them.

00:07:03,966 --> 00:07:04,925

You got it?

00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:06,510

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O understands.

00:07:06,635 --> 00:07:08,554

I'm gonna have to give you

a spankin', A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

00:07:08,679 --> 00:07:10,264

so that you learn better.

00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:15,144

And just know, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, that I

did it because I love you.

00:07:15,269 --> 00:07:17,896

Okay. Come on.

Let's go make some breakfast.

00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:20,691

[ Normal voice ] God damn it.

I have to find that videotape!

00:07:23,527 --> 00:07:25,195

Look at that, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:28,365

I drew a picture of us

playing in a field together.

00:07:28,490 --> 00:07:29,575

I'll be right back.

00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:31,368

I'm gonna go get

some Sunny Delight.

00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:33,203

I would like

some Sunny Delight, too.

00:07:33,328 --> 00:07:35,289

[ Chuckles ]

Don't be silly, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:07:35,414 --> 00:07:36,999

Robots don't need to drink

nothin'.

00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:38,000

[ Laughs ]

00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:39,042

[ Doorbell rings ]

00:07:39,168 --> 00:07:41,211

Oh!

Go answer the door, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:07:41,336 --> 00:07:43,755

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O will answer the door.

00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:47,634

What the hell are you doing,

fat-ass?

00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:49,261

Dude, are you still pretending

to be a robot?

00:07:49,386 --> 00:07:50,220

Shh!

00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:52,264

I just need to, uh,

make Butters think I'm a robot

00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:53,432

for a little while longer.

00:07:54,016 --> 00:07:54,975

Why?

00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:56,518

Because I need to, all right?!

00:07:56,643 --> 00:07:57,853

I've got something planned

00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:59,438

that's, uh, going to be

really sweet.

00:07:59,563 --> 00:08:00,814

Just play along, okay?

00:08:00,939 --> 00:08:02,274

Why?

00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:05,152

- Kyle, God damn it. Will you --

- Who's at the door, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:08:07,529 --> 00:08:10,324

[ Robotic voice ] Three boys

named Stan, Kyle, and Kenny.

00:08:10,449 --> 00:08:13,118

Oh, hey, fellas!

I see you've met my robot.

00:08:13,243 --> 00:08:14,578

Uh, yeah, Butters.

He's real cool.

00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:15,704

He sure is!

00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,206

We do everything together.

00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:19,958

Last night,

we even had a slumber party.

00:08:20,542 --> 00:08:21,335

Weak.

00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:23,170

He can do anything

I command him to.

00:08:23,295 --> 00:08:24,880

He's real smart.

Watch this.

00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:27,799

Hey, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, will you go get

my friends some Sunny Delight?

00:08:27,925 --> 00:08:29,551

Yes.

Of course.

00:08:31,261 --> 00:08:32,221

Oh, wait.

00:08:32,346 --> 00:08:34,473

Hey, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

I'd also like some celery sticks

00:08:34,598 --> 00:08:35,641

chopped up two inches long

00:08:35,766 --> 00:08:38,268

with peanut butter and raisins

on top.

00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:41,063

Suck my balls, Kyle.

00:08:41,605 --> 00:08:44,233

He's made in Japan!

00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:45,859

Yes, it has just been a delight

00:08:45,984 --> 00:08:47,694

having your son over,

Mrs. Cartman.

00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:49,988

He and Butters are really

getting along great.

00:08:50,113 --> 00:08:51,990

Oh, I'm so glad to hear it,

Mrs. Stotch.

00:08:52,115 --> 00:08:54,493

Eric has been having

some emotional problems lately.

00:08:54,618 --> 00:08:55,786

Well, the reason I'm calling

00:08:55,911 --> 00:08:57,371

is that Butters

is supposed to go see

00:08:57,496 --> 00:08:59,206

his Aunt Nellie in Los Angeles

this weekend.

00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:00,999

The boys are getting along

so well

00:09:01,124 --> 00:09:03,919

that we were thinking of

inviting Eric to go along.

00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:05,837

Oh.

Well, I'm not sure.

00:09:05,963 --> 00:09:08,173

Actually, Eric is still

supposed to be grounded

00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:10,884

for trying to exterminate

the Jews two weeks ago.

00:09:11,009 --> 00:09:13,178

Excuse me?

I didn't catch that.

00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:15,097

Oh, but I suppose

it would be good for him.

00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:16,223

Yes.

Of course he can go.

00:09:16,348 --> 00:09:17,641

I'll bring

some of his clothes over.

00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:19,935

Oh, wonderful!

The boys will be so excited.

00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:22,354

Maybe he put that videotape

in here somewhere.

00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:23,730

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, what are you doing?

00:09:23,855 --> 00:09:25,566

My friends are waiting

for their beverages.

00:09:25,691 --> 00:09:26,817

Chop-chop!

00:09:26,942 --> 00:09:28,485

Hey, guys!

Great news!

00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:29,695

It's all been arranged --

00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:31,363

You two are both going

to Los Angeles

00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:33,031

to visit Butters' Aunt Nellie!

00:09:33,156 --> 00:09:36,076

Oh, boy! My robot gets to come

with me to see Aunt Nellie?!

00:09:36,201 --> 00:09:36,910

What?

00:09:37,035 --> 00:09:38,161

Oh, boy, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

00:09:38,287 --> 00:09:40,414

We're gonna have

the best time ever!

00:09:40,539 --> 00:09:41,957

Lame.

00:09:46,461 --> 00:09:47,629

Hey, Nellie.

00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:49,798

Look what I found

scrampin' around the airport.

00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:50,882

Hi, Aunt Nellie!

00:09:51,008 --> 00:09:52,759

There's my little nephew!

00:09:52,884 --> 00:09:54,928

- How was your flight?

- It was long.

00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:56,805

We had a three-hour delay

departing Denver,

00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:57,848

but we're here!

00:09:57,973 --> 00:09:59,099

Didn't you bring any bags?

00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:01,059

Well, sure, but my robot

is bringing them in.

00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:02,227

Your robot?

00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:04,396

Butters' new friend

is a little strange.

00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:07,649

He -- He really takes

playing robot seriously.

00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,152

[ Grunting ]

00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:11,403

There he is!

00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:13,113

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O,

this is my Aunt Nellie.

00:10:13,238 --> 00:10:15,115

Hello!

It's nice to have you here!

00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:17,618

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O must dispense

oil waste.

00:10:17,743 --> 00:10:19,411

Where is the nearest toilet,

please?

00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:21,580

Oh, right through there,

Mr. Robot.

00:10:21,705 --> 00:10:23,540

Thank you.

00:10:23,665 --> 00:10:26,293

I don't think he took

the costume off the entire trip.

00:10:26,418 --> 00:10:28,128

Did you want to get

right to sightseeing,

00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:30,130

or are you boys hungry

after such a long flight?

00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:31,673

Naw.

I ate on the plane.

00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:34,051

And A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is a robot,

so he don't need to eat.

00:10:34,176 --> 00:10:35,302

Right.

00:10:37,471 --> 00:10:39,556

[ Gasping, panting ]

00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:42,893

Oh! Oh!

00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:46,938

[ Moaning ]

00:10:48,190 --> 00:10:49,816

- [ Knock on door ]

- BUTTERS: A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:51,193

Uh -- Uh -- A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is coming.

00:10:51,318 --> 00:10:54,196

Come on, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

We're gonna go a-sightseein'!

00:10:54,321 --> 00:10:55,364

[ Groans ]

00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:58,075

[ Tune to "Best Friend" plays ]

00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:01,328

BUTTERS: ♪ I'm hanging out

in L.A. with my robot friend ♪

00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:04,539

♪ We're havin' such fun

in the hot, hot sun ♪

00:11:04,665 --> 00:11:05,874

♪ We're two of a kind ♪

00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:10,045

♪ That's me

and my robot friend ♪

00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:13,340

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:11:13,465 --> 00:11:15,550

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:11:15,676 --> 00:11:17,844

Can you believe we're at a real,

live movie studio, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:11:17,969 --> 00:11:19,638

Aren't we having the best time?

00:11:19,763 --> 00:11:20,764

Butters, wouldn't you like

00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,641

to have some time away

from A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:11:22,766 --> 00:11:24,226

We could meet up later, perhaps.

00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:26,770

Hey, look over there, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

The film-studio commissary.

00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:28,230

That's where all them

rich movie producers

00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:30,399

that come up with Hollywood

blockbusters have their lunch.

00:11:30,524 --> 00:11:31,692

Neat-o, huh?

00:11:32,317 --> 00:11:33,276

Damn it, Mitch,

00:11:33,402 --> 00:11:35,862

how come our movie studio

can't come up with any winners?

00:11:35,987 --> 00:11:38,490

- I mean, we're smart, right?

- We're really smart.

00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:40,909

We need an idea for a movie

that's a home run --

00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:43,870

a feel-good romp

for the whole family.

00:11:43,995 --> 00:11:45,956

Hey, what's that over there?

00:11:46,081 --> 00:11:48,291

Wow! That's a really neat little

robot you have, little boy.

00:11:48,417 --> 00:11:49,418

What's he do?

00:11:49,543 --> 00:11:51,712

Well, he can do anything!

Watch this.

00:11:51,837 --> 00:11:54,297

Hey, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, who's gonna win

the Super Bowl next year?

00:11:54,423 --> 00:11:56,091

The New Orleans Saints.

00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:58,343

[ Laughter ]

00:11:58,468 --> 00:12:00,637

Hey, Mr. Robot, how much wood

would a woodchuck chuck

00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:02,431

if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:03,515

17.

00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:06,727

[ Laughter ]

00:12:06,852 --> 00:12:09,438

Mitch, are you thinking

what I'm thinking?

00:12:09,563 --> 00:12:10,480

Yeah.

00:12:10,605 --> 00:12:12,190

Maybe that robot

can be programmed

00:12:12,315 --> 00:12:14,443

to come up with movie ideas!

00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:16,486

Exactly.

00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:18,155

Gentlemen, this little boy

was kind enough

00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:21,074

to let us show you his robot --

the A.W.E.S.O.M.-O 4000.

00:12:21,199 --> 00:12:23,034

I've already seen

what it can do.

00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:26,204

Uh, excuse me, sir,

but, uh, that's not a robot.

00:12:26,329 --> 00:12:27,706

It's not?

00:12:27,831 --> 00:12:29,541

No.

It clearly has bipedal movement.

00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:32,085

So the correct term is

computerized automatron.

00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:34,212

- Oh, very nice, Mitch.

- You are the smart one.

00:12:34,337 --> 00:12:36,882

Well, regardless,

I believe maybe this automatron

00:12:37,007 --> 00:12:39,384

can help us come up with

new movie ideas.

00:12:39,509 --> 00:12:42,637

How can a robot come up with

better ideas for movies than us?

00:12:42,763 --> 00:12:43,638

Watch this.

00:12:43,764 --> 00:12:47,017

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O, given the current

trends of the moviegoing public,

00:12:47,142 --> 00:12:48,769

can you come up with an idea

for a movie

00:12:48,894 --> 00:12:51,772

that will break

$100 million box office?

00:12:51,897 --> 00:12:54,566

Um...okay.

How about this?

00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:58,779

Adam Sandler is, like,

in love with some girl.

00:12:58,904 --> 00:13:00,739

But then it turns out

that the girl

00:13:00,864 --> 00:13:04,117

is actually a golden retriever

or something.

00:13:05,619 --> 00:13:07,120

Oh, perfect!

00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:08,538

We'll call it "Puppy Love"!

00:13:08,663 --> 00:13:10,415

Give us another movie idea,

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

00:13:10,540 --> 00:13:11,625

- Yeah!

- Let's hear it!

00:13:11,750 --> 00:13:13,251

- Yeah! We want to hear them!

- Come on! Come on!

00:13:13,376 --> 00:13:14,377

Okay.

How about this?

00:13:14,503 --> 00:13:17,756

A-Adam Sandler inherits

like a billion dollars.

00:13:17,881 --> 00:13:22,761

But first he has to, like,

become a boxer or something.

00:13:22,886 --> 00:13:24,304

Yes!

It's flawless!

00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:26,431

"Punch-Drunk Billionaire"!

00:13:27,057 --> 00:13:29,518

Boy, Los Angeles is great,

huh, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:31,937

Can you believe those guys

paid us $100 apiece

00:13:32,062 --> 00:13:33,647

for those movie ideas?

00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:35,982

You should split that money

with A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:37,692

After all,

they were A.W.E.S.O.M.-O's ideas.

00:13:37,818 --> 00:13:38,902

[ Laughing ]

Oh, right!

00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:40,654

What are you gonna do

with money, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O --

00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:42,322

buy some robot pants?

00:13:42,447 --> 00:13:44,950

No, we've got each other, and

that's all we need, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:13:45,075 --> 00:13:46,159

I'm gonna send this money

00:13:46,284 --> 00:13:48,036

to needy kids

in Third World countries.

00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:50,121

[ Groans ]

00:13:50,247 --> 00:13:51,414

Y-You okay, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:13:51,540 --> 00:13:53,792

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O needs to rest!

Feeling faint!

00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:55,168

You go ahead and relax,

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:13:55,293 --> 00:13:57,921

We've got another full day

of pitching movies tomorrow.

00:13:58,046 --> 00:14:00,924

[ Dramatic music plays ]

00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:03,009

Gentlemen, ladies,

00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:05,846

we all know that we live

in a time of uncertainty.

00:14:05,971 --> 00:14:08,056

The risk of an attack

on American soil

00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:09,391

is higher than ever.

00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:12,769

Now I believe we might be able

to curb that risk.

00:14:12,894 --> 00:14:17,023

Two days ago, our intelligence

department came across this.

00:14:17,148 --> 00:14:18,233

[ Beeping ]

00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,151

The A.W.E.S.O.M.-O 4000.

00:14:20,277 --> 00:14:22,362

It is currently being used

by Catamount Pictures

00:14:22,487 --> 00:14:24,030

to develop ideas for movies.

00:14:24,155 --> 00:14:25,740

Our sources say

that in just one week,

00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:29,369

it has come up with

over 1,000 movie ideas,

00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:31,705

800 of which feature

Adam Sandler.

00:14:31,830 --> 00:14:32,831

- Oh, my God.

- That's amazing.

00:14:32,956 --> 00:14:33,748

Adam Sandler.

00:14:33,874 --> 00:14:34,875

That's incredible!

00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,085

You're thinking

the robot could be used

00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,879

to come up with

anti-Islamic movies?

00:14:39,004 --> 00:14:39,379

No.

00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,339

If we got our hands

on that robot,

00:14:41,464 --> 00:14:45,886

we could reprogram it

and turn it into a weapon.

00:14:46,011 --> 00:14:48,013

Yes. That might be

the best thing to do.

00:14:48,138 --> 00:14:49,681

Uh-huh. I don't see

how we have a choice.

00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:50,724

Hold on a second.

00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:52,475

If that robot is designed

for entertainment,

00:14:52,601 --> 00:14:54,644

then turning it into a weapon

is unethical.

00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:55,687

Unethical?

00:14:55,812 --> 00:14:58,565

Let me explain something to you,

Mr. Scientist.

00:14:58,690 --> 00:15:00,650

We understand that the robot

is from Japan.

00:15:00,775 --> 00:15:03,236

That means that the Japanese

have more of them.

00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:05,864

And if the Japanese fabricates

one of them into a weapon

00:15:05,989 --> 00:15:07,073

before we do...

00:15:07,198 --> 00:15:09,618

Jesus. It would be Pearl Harbor

all over again.

00:15:09,743 --> 00:15:11,912

But worse -- with robots.

00:15:12,037 --> 00:15:13,455

I'm sorry.

I must protest.

00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:16,207

We -- We have no data suggesting

the Japanese have developed

00:15:16,333 --> 00:15:18,001

a robot

with offensive capability.

00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:20,837

You're paid to think,

Mr. Scientist!

00:15:20,962 --> 00:15:23,131

National security is our job.

00:15:26,343 --> 00:15:29,095

Gentlemen, we're going

to Los Angeles.

00:15:29,220 --> 00:15:32,140

I want that robot.

00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:34,434

Yeah, me and my robot

00:15:34,559 --> 00:15:36,436

are still over at

the movie studio, Aunt Nellie.

00:15:36,561 --> 00:15:38,688

We're makin' all kinds

of money for the poor!

00:15:38,813 --> 00:15:42,859

[ Wearily ]

Movie idea number 2,305 --

00:15:42,984 --> 00:15:45,862

Adam Sandler is trapped

on an island

00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:48,823

and falls in love

with a coconut.

00:15:48,949 --> 00:15:49,991

Great, A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

Great.

00:15:50,116 --> 00:15:51,034

Guys, take a break.

00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:52,786

I need a minute alone

with A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:15:52,911 --> 00:15:55,372

[ Indistinct conversations ]

00:15:55,956 --> 00:15:58,458

You are an incredible robot,

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O.

00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,919

I was just wondering...

00:16:01,044 --> 00:16:04,255

are you by chance

a pleasure model?

00:16:04,839 --> 00:16:05,715

What?

00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:09,636

Well, have you been programmed

to satisfy...

00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:11,972

the urges of humans?

00:16:12,097 --> 00:16:14,182

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O does not understand.

00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:16,559

Let me show you what I mean.

00:16:16,685 --> 00:16:18,520

Yeah, we're having a great time,

Aunt Nellie.

00:16:18,645 --> 00:16:20,480

These movie-studio guys

are real nice.

00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:21,523

CARTMAN:

Lame!

00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:22,941

Yeah, we're making

a bunch more money.

00:16:23,066 --> 00:16:24,651

I can't believe it either.

00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:27,779

Not cool!

Totally lame!

00:16:27,904 --> 00:16:29,114

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:16:29,239 --> 00:16:30,198

I got to go, Aunt Nellie.

00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:32,742

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O is having

some kind of malfunction.

00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:35,120

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

Hey, where'd you go?

00:16:38,540 --> 00:16:41,042

- [ Groans ]

- [ Electricity crackling ]

00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:42,043

[ Grunts ]

00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:43,712

[ Dramatic music plays ]

00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:45,213

Let's go!

Move! Move!

00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:46,256

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O?

00:16:46,381 --> 00:16:47,632

Hey!

What are you doing with him?!

00:16:51,845 --> 00:16:53,096

That's my robot!

00:16:53,221 --> 00:16:55,557

[ Engine revs, tires screech ]

00:16:56,558 --> 00:16:59,936

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O-O-O-O!

00:17:00,979 --> 00:17:03,231

[ Dramatic music plays ]

00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:05,442

[ Whirring, clicks ]

00:17:08,570 --> 00:17:10,321

Are those arm and leg locks

secure?

00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:11,906

- Secure, sir.

- Good.

00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:13,324

I don't want that robot mobile

00:17:13,450 --> 00:17:15,118

until I know

what it's capable of.

00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,244

All right.

Power it on.

00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:17,829

[ Whirring ]

00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:21,875

[ Normal voice ]

Wha-whoa-wha-whoa-- Oh!

00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:23,835

- What the hell?

- What's going on?

00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:26,504

It...powered itself back on.

00:17:28,339 --> 00:17:30,592

Stand by.

Be ready to destroy it.

00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,052

[ Gun cocks ]

00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:35,013

Where the hell am I?

Hey! Why can't I move?!

00:17:35,138 --> 00:17:36,306

Are your systems stable?

00:17:36,431 --> 00:17:37,974

Run a systems check on your CPU.

00:17:38,099 --> 00:17:39,476

The fuck are you talking about,

dude?

00:17:39,601 --> 00:17:43,188

I-I'm sorry, robot, but they

want me to reprogram you.

00:17:43,313 --> 00:17:45,231

I'm not a robot, dumb-ass!

I'm alive!

00:17:45,356 --> 00:17:46,274

What did you say?

00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:48,651

I said I'm a real person,

ass-wipe!

00:17:49,652 --> 00:17:51,863

Oh, my God.

00:17:51,988 --> 00:17:53,031

What's happening?

00:17:53,156 --> 00:17:56,242

The robot --

It thinks it's alive.

00:17:56,367 --> 00:17:58,661

It's developed consciousness.

00:17:58,787 --> 00:18:00,497

What?

How can that be?

00:18:00,622 --> 00:18:02,582

Must be a malfunction

of its hexagraphical IMS

00:18:02,707 --> 00:18:04,334

or the interlaced B.V. system.

00:18:04,459 --> 00:18:07,670

Speak in a language we can

understand, Mr. Scientist.

00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:10,423

Your robot doesn't know

it's a robot!

00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:12,217

God damn it,

get me down from here.

00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:16,179

Who made you, robot?

00:18:16,304 --> 00:18:18,389

I'm not a robot.

I'm a human!

00:18:18,515 --> 00:18:20,058

Jesus.

The scientist is right.

00:18:20,183 --> 00:18:22,727

But who would have programmed it

to think it was human?

00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:23,770

The movie studio?

00:18:23,895 --> 00:18:26,064

Look, retards,

my name is Eric Cartman!

00:18:26,189 --> 00:18:28,233

I live with my mom

in South Park, Colorado.

00:18:28,358 --> 00:18:30,485

Dear Christ.

They gave it memories, too.

00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:31,528

Sure.

Why not?

00:18:31,653 --> 00:18:33,571

Program the memories

of some eight-year-old boy

00:18:33,696 --> 00:18:36,366

who doesn't exist, and make

the robot think he's real.

00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:38,118

Makes for a lot better movies.

00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:41,663

I'm not reprogramming a robot

that's developed consciousness.

00:18:41,788 --> 00:18:44,082

Do I have to remind you

of your position?!

00:18:44,207 --> 00:18:48,294

Don't forget you have a duty

to your country, Mr. Scientist!

00:18:48,419 --> 00:18:51,756

I want that robot's memories

and consciousness erased

00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:53,466

so we can take it back

to Washington.

00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:54,717

Got it?!

00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:57,887

Damn you all to hell.

00:18:58,012 --> 00:19:01,391

[ Slow piano music plays ]

00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:03,601

BUTTERS: [ Voice breaking ]

♪ Hey, there, did you know ♪

00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:06,646

♪ I had a robot friend? ♪

00:19:06,771 --> 00:19:09,232

♪ We used to laugh and play ♪

00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:12,152

♪ But someone took him away ♪

00:19:12,277 --> 00:19:17,365

♪ He was my 10-gigahertz

old pal ♪

00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:21,286

♪ My robot friend ♪

00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:23,788

Hey, wait a minute.

00:19:25,790 --> 00:19:28,293

Well, that's the van that --

Oh, my God!

00:19:28,418 --> 00:19:29,335

[ Whirring ]

00:19:29,460 --> 00:19:32,547

God damn it, stop!

I'm real! I'm real!

00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:35,133

It'll all be over soon, robot!

00:19:35,258 --> 00:19:36,926

[ Dramatic music plays ]

00:19:37,051 --> 00:19:38,511

[ Grunts ]

00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:41,472

Hang on. I'm getting you

out of here, robot.

00:19:41,598 --> 00:19:43,433

Oh, it's about friggin' time,

jackass!

00:19:43,558 --> 00:19:45,518

What the hell are you doing?!

00:19:46,561 --> 00:19:48,813

I-I'm saving a conscious being.

00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:51,399

If you want to kill it,

you'll have to go through me!

00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:54,110

Fine.

Kill that son of a bitch.

00:19:54,235 --> 00:19:55,486

No!

Look, God damn it.

00:19:55,612 --> 00:19:58,114

Now I can show you stupid

assholes who I really am.

00:19:58,239 --> 00:20:00,116

A.W.E.S.O.M.-O!

00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:03,244

[ Robotic voice ]

I am the A.W.E.S.O.M.-O 4000.

00:20:04,078 --> 00:20:05,538

[ Grunts ]

00:20:05,663 --> 00:20:07,207

No!

No! Please!

00:20:07,332 --> 00:20:09,709

Don't kill him!

He's my best friend!

00:20:09,834 --> 00:20:11,961

He's my best friend

in the whole world!

00:20:12,086 --> 00:20:15,048

He's my...

[ Sobs ]

00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:19,219

[ Weakly ]

There. You see?

00:20:19,344 --> 00:20:21,930

You want to tell me

this isn't humanity?

00:20:22,055 --> 00:20:25,183

Who's to judge what makes

something human, anyway?

00:20:25,308 --> 00:20:27,393

Does this make me human?

00:20:27,518 --> 00:20:28,978

Or this?

00:20:29,103 --> 00:20:30,521

Or these?

00:20:30,647 --> 00:20:31,731

[ Grunts ]

00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:36,819

Perhaps...there is consciousness

in this robot.

00:20:36,945 --> 00:20:39,239

Maybe we as a society

need to realize

00:20:39,364 --> 00:20:42,784

that artificial intelligence

is intelligence all the same

00:20:42,909 --> 00:20:45,703

and we can learn

from the robots.

00:20:45,828 --> 00:20:47,497

I think maybe one day

we can all --

00:20:47,622 --> 00:20:49,332

[ Farts ]

00:20:49,457 --> 00:20:52,252

Wait a minute.

Did -- Did that robot just fart?

00:20:52,377 --> 00:20:54,295

Hey, robots don't fart.

00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:56,631

Uh, now ending fart sequence.

00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:58,299

Oh, and it -- it smells, too!

00:20:58,424 --> 00:20:59,926

Smell sequence initiated.

00:21:00,051 --> 00:21:03,179

A robot with smelly farts?

That doesn't make any sense.

00:21:03,304 --> 00:21:05,139

Hang on a second here!

00:21:05,265 --> 00:21:07,267

[All gasp ]

00:21:07,392 --> 00:21:09,435

- [ Laughter ]

- [ Up-tempo music playing ]

00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:11,396

♪ Would you like to touch

my body? ♪

00:21:11,521 --> 00:21:13,147

♪ Come on and touch my body ♪

00:21:13,273 --> 00:21:14,983

♪ Ooh, my hot body ♪

00:21:15,108 --> 00:21:16,776

♪ Don't you like my hot body? ♪

00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:18,653

♪ Come on and touch my titties ♪

00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:20,655

♪ I've got such nice,

ripe titties ♪

00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:22,615

♪ Come on, Justin,

touch my body ♪

00:21:22,740 --> 00:21:24,450

Ooh, Justin.

Yeah.

00:21:24,575 --> 00:21:26,160

♪ Touch my body, you and me ♪

00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:28,454

♪ Check out my nice, hard body ♪

00:21:28,579 --> 00:21:30,498

♪ Come on, my body ♪

00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:33,209

Wow, kid.

You're a little faggot.

00:21:33,334 --> 00:21:34,836

Lame.