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Рождество в Канаде
It's Christmas in Canada
Сезон: 07Серия: 15
Описание
Накануне Рождества появляются настоящие родители Айка, забирающие его обратно в Канаду. Кайл с друзьями отправляется вслед за ними, чтобы поговорить с новым премьер-министром этой страны и вернуть Айка.
Субтитры
- 00:00:08,926 --> 00:00:12,346 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time ♪
- 00:00:12,471 --> 00:00:14,098 ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
- 00:00:14,223 --> 00:00:15,599 ♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪
- 00:00:15,725 --> 00:00:18,894 ♪ Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪
- 00:00:19,020 --> 00:00:20,730 ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
- 00:00:20,855 --> 00:00:22,356 ♪ People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor!" ♪
- 00:00:22,481 --> 00:00:25,735 ♪ Heading on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
- 00:00:25,860 --> 00:00:28,904 Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmhmhm rm!
- 00:00:29,030 --> 00:00:33,159 ♪ Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine ♪
- 00:00:36,996 --> 00:00:39,373 ♪ Hanukkah, Hanukkah ♪
- 00:00:39,498 --> 00:00:41,375 ♪ Sivivon, sov, sov ♪
- 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:42,626 I got to go tinkle. - ♪ Sov, sov, sov ♪
- 00:00:42,752 --> 00:00:43,711 No, Ike. Shh! - ♪ Sov, sov, sov ♪
- 00:00:43,836 --> 00:00:46,505 ♪ Ma nayim vi-tov ♪
- 00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:49,216 We thank God for our blessings this Hanukkah.
- 00:00:49,341 --> 00:00:52,178 Our little family is so loving and perfect,
- 00:00:52,303 --> 00:00:54,388 and nothing will ever tear us apart.
- 00:00:56,015 --> 00:00:57,683 I'll get it.
- 00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:01,103 Gerald Broflovski?
- 00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:02,063 Yes.
- 00:01:02,188 --> 00:01:04,565 My name is Harry Gints, and this is my wife, Elise.
- 00:01:04,690 --> 00:01:06,192 We're from Canada.
- 00:01:06,317 --> 00:01:07,651 Yes. I can tell.
- 00:01:07,777 --> 00:01:10,029 My wife and I had a child a few years back,
- 00:01:10,154 --> 00:01:11,989 and we weren't ready to have a child,
- 00:01:12,114 --> 00:01:13,532 so we put him up for adoption.
- 00:01:13,657 --> 00:01:15,034 We were told that you might be the --
- 00:01:15,159 --> 00:01:17,870 Peter! Oh, God, Harry! It's our son!
- 00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:20,039 Peter, it's Mommy.
- 00:01:20,164 --> 00:01:22,083 Gerald, what the hell is going on?
- 00:01:22,208 --> 00:01:24,251 Uh, I'm not sure.
- 00:01:24,376 --> 00:01:26,087 It was a tough time for us.
- 00:01:26,212 --> 00:01:27,755 It was a tough time for all of Canada.
- 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:30,508 The whole country was devastated by the Cola Wars.
- 00:01:30,633 --> 00:01:32,593 It just seemed we couldn't take care of a baby.
- 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:35,054 So we put him up for adoption, but as the years passed,
- 00:01:35,179 --> 00:01:37,556 I-I just felt an emptiness in my heart.
- 00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:39,725 Oh, it's so good to see him!
- 00:01:39,850 --> 00:01:42,603 Well, we wish you all the best, Mr. And Mrs. Gints.
- 00:01:42,728 --> 00:01:45,481 But to be honest, I think it would be best for Ike
- 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:47,650 if you didn't come around again.
- 00:01:47,775 --> 00:01:49,401 I don't think you understand.
- 00:01:49,527 --> 00:01:51,070 We didn't come to visit Peter.
- 00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:52,696 We came to take him back.
- 00:01:52,822 --> 00:01:53,781 What?
- 00:01:53,906 --> 00:01:56,075 We want to take Peter home to Canada.
- 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:57,243 Are you crazy?!
- 00:01:57,368 --> 00:01:58,869 Look, you gave Ike up.
- 00:01:58,994 --> 00:02:00,663 You can't just change your mind!
- 00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:02,289 Changing your mind is a Canadian custom
- 00:02:02,414 --> 00:02:03,457 that we hold quite dear.
- 00:02:03,582 --> 00:02:05,584 And besides, the new Canadian prime minister
- 00:02:05,709 --> 00:02:07,711 has issued a decree that all adopted Canadians
- 00:02:07,837 --> 00:02:09,421 must be returned home.
- 00:02:09,547 --> 00:02:11,382 The new Canadian prime minister?
- 00:02:11,507 --> 00:02:13,425 Look, Ike is our son now!
- 00:02:13,551 --> 00:02:14,927 He doesn't belong here.
- 00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:17,012 He belongs in Canada with his own kind.
- 00:02:17,138 --> 00:02:18,472 I think you'd better leave.
- 00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:20,141 Please, don't make this any harder for Peter.
- 00:02:20,266 --> 00:02:21,517 Harder for Peter?!
- 00:02:21,642 --> 00:02:22,810 You two just blow in here
- 00:02:22,935 --> 00:02:24,645 and say you're gonna haul him back to Canada,
- 00:02:24,770 --> 00:02:26,480 and <i>we 're</i> being hard on Peter?!
- 00:02:26,605 --> 00:02:27,523 We're prepared to go to court.
- 00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:28,941 We had hoped it wouldn't come to that.
- 00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:31,235 Well, you bet your ass it'll come to that!
- 00:02:33,237 --> 00:02:35,447 I'm sorry to say that my hands are tied.
- 00:02:35,573 --> 00:02:36,907 The new prime minister of Canada
- 00:02:37,032 --> 00:02:39,160 has authority this court cannot override.
- 00:02:39,285 --> 00:02:41,954 By Canadian law, I must award custody of the child
- 00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,372 to his birth parents.
- 00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:45,249 Yes! - Yes! Yes!
- 00:02:45,374 --> 00:02:46,000 No!
- 00:02:46,125 --> 00:02:48,252 Ike's not my little brother anymore?
- 00:02:48,377 --> 00:02:49,628 Gerald, do something!
- 00:02:49,753 --> 00:02:51,297 There's nothing I can do.
- 00:02:53,007 --> 00:02:55,342 Goodbye, Ike.
- 00:02:55,467 --> 00:02:58,095 You...be a good boy, huh?
- 00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:01,682 You -- You remember all the things we taught you.
- 00:03:03,809 --> 00:03:06,687 Ike...you'll always be my little brother, okay?
- 00:03:06,812 --> 00:03:08,522 Come on, Peter. We should get going.
- 00:03:08,647 --> 00:03:10,482 No.
- 00:03:10,608 --> 00:03:12,109 Peter, you must come with Mommy and Daddy.
- 00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:14,195 No, no, no, no, no!
- 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:16,405 I have some chocolate.
- 00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,157 Chocolate!
- 00:03:19,909 --> 00:03:21,493 We're going to take good care of him.
- 00:03:21,619 --> 00:03:22,828 You'd better.
- 00:03:34,215 --> 00:03:37,051 Dad? Can't we talk to this new Canadian prime minister?
- 00:03:37,176 --> 00:03:38,719 If he knew the situation, he might --
- 00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:41,639 Oh, Kyle, appealing to the prime minister of Canada
- 00:03:41,764 --> 00:03:45,476 would take time and money we don't have.
- 00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:50,272 Dude, look at that.
- 00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:53,317 The Sprinkle Time Make Your Own Marshmallow Factory.
- 00:03:53,442 --> 00:03:55,569 I'm definitely asking for that for Christmas.
- 00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:57,655 I'm gonna tell my parents to get me that John Elway doll
- 00:03:57,780 --> 00:04:00,324 with the karate-chop action.
- 00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:02,243 Guys. Guys, I need your help.
- 00:04:02,368 --> 00:04:03,285 Sure, dude.
- 00:04:03,410 --> 00:04:04,995 It's been a week since Ike's been gone,
- 00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:06,580 and every day my parents seem worse.
- 00:04:06,705 --> 00:04:07,998 I have to try to go to Canada
- 00:04:08,123 --> 00:04:09,917 and speak with the new Canadian prime minister.
- 00:04:10,042 --> 00:04:11,126 But I can't do it alone.
- 00:04:11,252 --> 00:04:13,420 We can't go to Canada, dumb-ass! It's Christmas!
- 00:04:13,545 --> 00:04:16,090 Yeah. What if we miss out on some great Christmas adventure?
- 00:04:16,215 --> 00:04:17,800 Please, you guys. You don't understand.
- 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,176 My family is devastated.
- 00:04:19,301 --> 00:04:21,095 My mom just walks around the house like a zombie,
- 00:04:21,220 --> 00:04:22,846 and my dad can't stop crying.
- 00:04:22,972 --> 00:04:24,598 Well, I didn't want to say anything, Kyle,
- 00:04:24,723 --> 00:04:26,433 but I think maybe this is what your family gets
- 00:04:26,558 --> 00:04:28,185 for being Jewish at Christmastime.
- 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:29,103 Dude, Cartman.
- 00:04:29,228 --> 00:04:31,981 I'm just saying maybe Jesus is having a little revenge.
- 00:04:32,106 --> 00:04:34,275 I found the number of a really cheap airline to Canada.
- 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,693 If we go as soon as possible --
- 00:04:35,818 --> 00:04:37,820 Dude, we just can't up and go to Canada.
- 00:04:37,945 --> 00:04:39,488 They're about to light the Christmas tree.
- 00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:42,074 Maybe you can get your brother back some other way.
- 00:04:45,536 --> 00:04:47,288 Kyle, I just want you to know,
- 00:04:47,413 --> 00:04:48,956 if it were any other time of the year,
- 00:04:49,081 --> 00:04:51,083 I still wouldn't help you.
- 00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:56,338 Three! Two! One!
- 00:04:59,216 --> 00:05:00,926 As we celebrate this glorious time,
- 00:05:01,051 --> 00:05:03,012 we can't forget those families who are suffering.
- 00:05:03,137 --> 00:05:05,431 As many of you know, the Broflovski family
- 00:05:05,556 --> 00:05:07,725 has recently had their child torn away from them.
- 00:05:07,850 --> 00:05:11,186 As a community, we must do all we can to ease their pain.
- 00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:13,397 Are there any suggestions how we might help?
- 00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:18,569 How about we get rid of all the Mexicans?
- 00:05:19,945 --> 00:05:21,280 Mr. Garrison, every Christmas
- 00:05:21,405 --> 00:05:23,032 you suggest we get rid of all the Mexicans,
- 00:05:23,157 --> 00:05:25,075 and every Christmas we tell you no.
- 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:26,368 Rats!
- 00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:28,996 The Broflovskis need money to appeal their case
- 00:05:29,121 --> 00:05:30,497 to the new Canadian prime minister.
- 00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:33,000 What if this Christmas, instead of buying presents,
- 00:05:33,125 --> 00:05:36,128 we all use that money to give to the Broflovskis?
- 00:05:36,253 --> 00:05:37,713 Ha! Yeah, right!
- 00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:40,090 Like our parents aren't gonna buy us presents for Christmas.
- 00:05:40,215 --> 00:05:42,468 That's a great idea, Chef. - What?
- 00:05:42,593 --> 00:05:44,678 Yeah. Who needs more stuff, anyway?
- 00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:47,598 This Christmas we can do something that really matters!
- 00:05:47,723 --> 00:05:49,016 Dad, don't get carried away.
- 00:05:49,141 --> 00:05:50,017 Then it's settled.
- 00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:51,685 This year, we'll give all our Christmas money
- 00:05:51,810 --> 00:05:54,188 to the Broflovskis in hopes that they may someday
- 00:05:54,313 --> 00:05:55,856 have their child returned to them.
- 00:05:57,524 --> 00:06:00,027 No. No. This can't be happening!
- 00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:07,785 You fucking asshole!
- 00:06:07,910 --> 00:06:09,953 This is all your fault! - What?
- 00:06:10,079 --> 00:06:12,623 Everyone's gonna be charitable and give money to your family
- 00:06:12,748 --> 00:06:14,375 instead of buying Christmas presents!
- 00:06:14,500 --> 00:06:16,877 You fucking Jews ruined Christmas again!
- 00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:18,545 Aah! - Whoa. Whoa. Cartman.
- 00:06:18,670 --> 00:06:20,714 It wasn't enough for you people to kill Jesus!
- 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:22,925 Now you have to kill Christmas, too, huh?!
- 00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:24,927 Cartman, calm down! - Is that true?
- 00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:27,346 It's true, dude. Christmas is ruined.
- 00:06:27,471 --> 00:06:29,098 This is it, Kyle. You and me.
- 00:06:29,223 --> 00:06:30,974 We're throwing down right now.
- 00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:33,268 I'm sorry, you guys, but there is something we can do.
- 00:06:33,394 --> 00:06:35,979 We can go to Canada and see the prime minister like I said.
- 00:06:36,105 --> 00:06:37,773 If we can change <i>his</i> mind before Christmas,
- 00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:39,858 then your parents won't have to give my family money.
- 00:06:39,983 --> 00:06:41,527 You really think if we go to Canada,
- 00:06:41,652 --> 00:06:42,778 we might still get presents?
- 00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:43,862 It's worth a shot.
- 00:06:43,987 --> 00:06:45,781 Come on, you guys. We can do this.
- 00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:46,782 Oh, all right.
- 00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,826 But we'd better not miss out on any great Christmas adventures.
- 00:06:48,951 --> 00:06:50,828 We'll get back in time for a Christmas adventure.
- 00:06:50,953 --> 00:06:52,663 Fine, but if it doesn't work,
- 00:06:52,788 --> 00:06:54,248 you and me are gonna have it out, Kyle.
- 00:06:54,373 --> 00:06:55,958 Once and for all.
- 00:06:59,545 --> 00:07:01,463 No business.
- 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:06,301 Christmastime come and nobody want to eat Chinese food.
- 00:07:07,344 --> 00:07:09,930 Looks like I might as well close.
- 00:07:11,974 --> 00:07:15,477 Oh, boy! Some business! Finally!
- 00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:17,938 Hello! Chitty Wok! Take order, please!
- 00:07:18,063 --> 00:07:19,314 Oh. I must have the wrong number.
- 00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:20,941 We were trying to reach City Airlines.
- 00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:23,068 Oh. Oh, yes. Just a moment, please.
- 00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:26,530 Hello. Chitty Airlines.
- 00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:27,990 Can I help you take order, please?
- 00:07:28,115 --> 00:07:30,701 Uh, we need to go to Canada as soon as possible.
- 00:07:30,826 --> 00:07:33,579 Ooh, Canada. Okay. That's pretty far.
- 00:07:33,704 --> 00:07:35,956 Gonna cost a lot of money. Let's see.
- 00:07:36,081 --> 00:07:37,833 How many people? - Four.
- 00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,919 Okay. Four people, Canada, cost a lot of money.
- 00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:44,673 Gonna be about 6,500 dorrah.
- 00:07:45,299 --> 00:07:46,967 How about 50 dorrah?
- 00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:49,136 50 dorrah?!
- 00:07:49,261 --> 00:07:52,598 You flying to Canada! Cost at least 3,000 dorrah!
- 00:07:52,723 --> 00:07:54,433 55 dorrah.
- 00:07:54,558 --> 00:07:57,478 Hey! Stop wasting my time with 55 dorrah.
- 00:07:57,603 --> 00:08:01,523 No way I take my plane to Canada for less than 1,000 dorrah!
- 00:08:01,648 --> 00:08:03,650 Okay. 60 dorrah.
- 00:08:03,775 --> 00:08:06,403 62 dorrah. - Okay.
- 00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:08,155 Okay. Meet me Park County Airfield.
- 00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:10,616 Yellow Cessna. Tail number 432G.
- 00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:11,700 Got it!
- 00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,537 Never try to barter with a Chinese man.
- 00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:20,209 We have exactly 52 hours before Christmas.
- 00:08:20,334 --> 00:08:22,169 That means we have to be back in 28 hours
- 00:08:22,294 --> 00:08:24,838 to still give our parents 24 hours to buy us presents.
- 00:08:24,963 --> 00:08:26,256 Synchronize watches on my mark.
- 00:08:26,381 --> 00:08:27,257 Mark.
- 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,552 Hello! Welcome Chitty Airline!
- 00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:33,347 Oh, no. No, no, no, no. I am not flying in that thing.
- 00:08:33,472 --> 00:08:34,348 Mrph.
- 00:08:34,473 --> 00:08:36,475 Why not? - Mrph rmhmhm rm!
- 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:38,644 You're not gonna die, Kenny! Don't be stupid!
- 00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:39,645 You guys go get Ike.
- 00:08:39,770 --> 00:08:41,605 Kenny and I will stay here and watch the fort.
- 00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:42,648 No. You're both coming.
- 00:08:42,773 --> 00:08:44,233 Do you care about Christmas or not?
- 00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:45,651 Of course I care about Christmas!
- 00:08:45,776 --> 00:08:47,319 Oh, Christ on a stick!
- 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,990 Oh, dude, it smells like kung pao chicken in here.
- 00:08:52,115 --> 00:08:53,909 Okay. Welcome aboard Chitty Airline.
- 00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:55,536 This is your captain speaking.
- 00:08:55,661 --> 00:08:57,162 Looking about two-hour flight.
- 00:08:57,287 --> 00:08:59,081 I'll be turning on the seat belt sign now.
- 00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:00,541 If your seats <i>had</i> seat belts,
- 00:09:00,666 --> 00:09:02,334 this is the time you would fasten them.
- 00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:06,046 Please sit back, relax, and enjoy your Chitty flight.
- 00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:15,013 All right! We're going to Canada!
- 00:09:15,138 --> 00:09:16,682 Weak.
- 00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:33,907 Hey. Turn off the light.
- 00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:36,243 Whoa. Wait! Oh. Oh!
- 00:09:36,368 --> 00:09:37,953 What's going on?
- 00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:40,914 Hello from the cockpit. This is your captain speaking.
- 00:09:41,039 --> 00:09:43,333 As you can see, it appears that we are going down.
- 00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:45,877 Now would be a good time to reflect on your life
- 00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:48,046 and pray to whatever deity you believe in.
- 00:09:48,171 --> 00:09:49,881 Thank you for flying Chitty Airlines.
- 00:09:50,007 --> 00:09:51,383 We know you have a choice in airlines,
- 00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,468 and it looks like you made the wrong one.
- 00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:55,887 Hey! Where the hell are you going?!
- 00:09:57,389 --> 00:10:00,309 Do something, Kyle! - I'm trying!
- 00:10:00,434 --> 00:10:03,061 Look out! - Mrphhhh!
- 00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:14,656 You guys.
- 00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:17,117 I don't think we're in America anymore.
- 00:10:20,203 --> 00:10:23,707 Excuse me! Uh, is this an invasion?
- 00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:25,459 No.
- 00:10:25,584 --> 00:10:27,461 Oh, thank heavens! It's okay.
- 00:10:27,586 --> 00:10:28,920 Everyone, it's not an invasion!
- 00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,799 I was sure when that plane fell from the sky
- 00:10:32,924 --> 00:10:33,967 that we had an invader!
- 00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:35,594 Hey, we're in Canada!
- 00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:37,220 Well, of course you are!
- 00:10:37,346 --> 00:10:39,556 And Canada, friends, welcomes you!
- 00:10:40,724 --> 00:10:42,184 ♪ Welcome, friends, to Canada ♪
- 00:10:42,309 --> 00:10:43,894 ♪ Canada, friends, loves you ♪
- 00:10:44,019 --> 00:10:45,520 ♪ We're just like any other country ♪
- 00:10:45,646 --> 00:10:46,938 ♪ Without the big to-do ♪
- 00:10:47,064 --> 00:10:48,649 We greet thee with pleasure.
- 00:10:48,774 --> 00:10:50,359 But one question, if we may.
- 00:10:50,484 --> 00:10:54,071 What brings you folks to Canada? Why are you here today?
- 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:58,325 Uh, my adopted brother got taken back here to Canada.
- 00:10:58,450 --> 00:11:00,869 So we want to talk to the new Canadian prime minister
- 00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,204 about getting him back.
- 00:11:02,329 --> 00:11:03,872 ♪ His brother's here somewhere ♪
- 00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,374 ♪ The question is, is where? ♪
- 00:11:05,499 --> 00:11:07,209 ♪ He must talk to the new prime minister here ♪
- 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,627 ♪ To get his brother home back there ♪
- 00:11:08,752 --> 00:11:10,420 Oh, Jesus Christ.
- 00:11:10,545 --> 00:11:12,714 Hey! What the hell is going on?!
- 00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:15,384 It's Scott!
- 00:11:15,509 --> 00:11:17,344 Aah! Get away!
- 00:11:17,469 --> 00:11:19,596 Who damaged our beloved Canadian land?
- 00:11:19,721 --> 00:11:21,932 Who's that? - That's Scott. He's a dick!
- 00:11:22,974 --> 00:11:25,727 Aha! Americans! I should have known!
- 00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:27,187 You think you're the police of the world!
- 00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:28,271 You think you own Canada!
- 00:11:28,397 --> 00:11:30,774 Well, you aren't welcome here. Get out now!
- 00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,943 Oh, no, you don't, Scott. Leave these boys alone.
- 00:11:33,068 --> 00:11:34,778 This isn't over, you American scum.
- 00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:36,780 I swear to God, you'll rue this day!
- 00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:40,409 God! What a dick!
- 00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:42,411 Look, we don't have a lot of time here, okay?
- 00:11:42,536 --> 00:11:44,579 Can you just tell us where the new prime minister is?
- 00:11:44,705 --> 00:11:46,873 The new prime minister doesn't live in this part of Canada.
- 00:11:46,998 --> 00:11:48,041 He's in Ottawa.
- 00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:52,462 So, how do we get to Ottawa? - Oh, that's easy.
- 00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:54,047 You just have to follow the road.
- 00:11:54,172 --> 00:11:55,173 Which road?
- 00:11:55,298 --> 00:11:58,135 This is Canada. We only have one road.
- 00:11:58,260 --> 00:12:00,137 ♪ Follow the only road ♪
- 00:12:00,262 --> 00:12:01,930 ♪ Follow the only road ♪
- 00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:03,598 ♪ To go anywhere in Canada ♪
- 00:12:03,724 --> 00:12:05,308 ♪ You just follow the only road ♪
- 00:12:05,434 --> 00:12:07,185 ♪ There's only one road in Canada ♪
- 00:12:07,310 --> 00:12:08,937 ♪ We call it the road, the only road ♪
- 00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:12,065 ♪ Hip-hip hooray! Let's hear it for our road ♪
- 00:12:12,190 --> 00:12:14,818 ♪ It's paved and wide and up to code ♪
- 00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:15,652 All right, dude.
- 00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:17,028 Let's get the hell out of here. - Word.
- 00:12:17,154 --> 00:12:18,613 ♪ You're off to see the prime minister ♪
- 00:12:18,739 --> 00:12:20,574 ♪ The prime minister of Canada ♪
- 00:12:20,699 --> 00:12:21,825 Goodbye, friends!
- 00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:23,618 Good luck with the new prime minister!
- 00:12:23,744 --> 00:12:26,037 And remember to watch out for Scott. He's a dick!
- 00:12:26,163 --> 00:12:27,038 Goodbye! - So long!
- 00:12:27,164 --> 00:12:29,374 See you! - Watch out for Scott!
- 00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:32,836 20 hours until Christmas.
- 00:12:32,961 --> 00:12:36,089 Our parents still have time to buy us presents if we hurry.
- 00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:38,842 Ahoy there, travelers! - Who are you?
- 00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:42,304 I am Rick, the proud Canadian Mountie.
- 00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:47,017 I thought Mounties were supposed to ride horses.
- 00:12:47,726 --> 00:12:49,352 Yes. Yes, we are.
- 00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:52,230 But our funding has been cut, and now we're forced to ride...
- 00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:56,276 We're in a rush to see the new prime minister.
- 00:12:56,401 --> 00:12:58,361 You're going to see the new prime minister?
- 00:12:58,487 --> 00:13:00,197 Oh, I would so like to meet him myself.
- 00:13:00,322 --> 00:13:02,532 It's his strange new laws that took our horses away.
- 00:13:02,657 --> 00:13:03,950 Perhaps I will go with you.
- 00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:05,535 That's okay. We'd rather go by ourselves.
- 00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,204 Follow me this way!
- 00:13:07,329 --> 00:13:08,663 ♪ We're going to see the prime minister ♪
- 00:13:08,789 --> 00:13:10,874 ♪ The prime minister of Canada ♪
- 00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:14,544 Power-hungry Americans. I'll fix you!
- 00:13:17,464 --> 00:13:20,300 Oh, Jesus. 18 hours. We're running out of time.
- 00:13:20,425 --> 00:13:21,676 All right, boys. Prepare yourselves.
- 00:13:21,802 --> 00:13:23,678 We're about to enter French Canada.
- 00:13:23,804 --> 00:13:25,222 French Canada?
- 00:13:25,347 --> 00:13:28,058 ♪ There's no Canada like French Canada ♪
- 00:13:28,183 --> 00:13:30,310 ♪ It's the best Canada in the land ♪
- 00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:32,854 ♪ The other Canada is hardly Canada ♪
- 00:13:32,979 --> 00:13:34,856 ♪ If you lived here for a day, you'd understand ♪
- 00:13:34,981 --> 00:13:38,735 Ha ha ha! Welcome to French Canada!
- 00:13:38,860 --> 00:13:40,821 We have everything your heart could desire.
- 00:13:40,946 --> 00:13:44,032 Trapezes, trampolines, and lots and lots of cheese.
- 00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:46,243 Would you like a mustache?
- 00:13:46,368 --> 00:13:47,202 Just stay calm, boys.
- 00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,079 French Canadians are a little odd.
- 00:13:49,204 --> 00:13:51,665 Uh, we're just passing through to see the new prime minister.
- 00:13:51,790 --> 00:13:54,543 Well, first you must answer that phone.
- 00:13:54,668 --> 00:13:56,670 Ring, ring. Ring, ring.
- 00:13:56,795 --> 00:13:58,380 We don't have time for this.
- 00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:00,173 You cannot pass through French Canada
- 00:14:00,298 --> 00:14:02,050 unless you take that phone call!
- 00:14:02,175 --> 00:14:03,885 Ring, ring. Ring, ring.
- 00:14:05,929 --> 00:14:06,888 Hello.
- 00:14:07,013 --> 00:14:09,641 Hello! If you are going to see the new prime minister,
- 00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:11,101 then I want to go with you.
- 00:14:11,226 --> 00:14:12,310 He has passed a new law
- 00:14:12,435 --> 00:14:14,855 forbidding us French Canadians to drink wine!
- 00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:16,773 How can the French not drink wine?
- 00:14:16,898 --> 00:14:17,774 Travesty!
- 00:14:17,899 --> 00:14:19,317 Okay. You can come with us.
- 00:14:19,442 --> 00:14:22,571 Ho ho! Very good! Let us make haste!
- 00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:25,323 ♪ There's no Canada like French Canada ♪
- 00:14:25,448 --> 00:14:27,868 ♪ It's the best Canada in the land ♪
- 00:14:27,993 --> 00:14:30,287 ♪ And the other Canada is a bullshit Canada ♪
- 00:14:30,412 --> 00:14:33,123 ♪ If you lived here for a day, you'd understand ♪
- 00:14:33,248 --> 00:14:35,667 I think you'd understand.
- 00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:37,460 You understand.
- 00:14:43,300 --> 00:14:46,386 Oh, my! This certainly is a desolate place.
- 00:14:46,511 --> 00:14:48,889 It reminds me of death and fear.
- 00:14:49,014 --> 00:14:51,725 How much further to Ottawa? Christmas is only 12 hours away!
- 00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:53,560 We must be very close now.
- 00:14:53,685 --> 00:14:55,353 Hey! What are you doing?
- 00:14:56,313 --> 00:14:57,981 Oh, no. It's Scott!
- 00:14:58,106 --> 00:14:59,858 What are you two doing helping these Americans?
- 00:14:59,983 --> 00:15:01,651 Don't you know America thinks it owns Canada
- 00:15:01,776 --> 00:15:03,069 along with the rest of the world?
- 00:15:03,194 --> 00:15:04,487 You're a dick, Scott!
- 00:15:04,613 --> 00:15:05,488 <i>You're</i> a dick!
- 00:15:05,614 --> 00:15:07,866 And by helping Americans, you're just as smelly as they are!
- 00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:09,242 Now I'm going to get you!
- 00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:10,452 Not so fast, Scott.
- 00:15:10,577 --> 00:15:11,661 Who the hell are you?
- 00:15:11,786 --> 00:15:13,121 I am Steve the Newfoundlander,
- 00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:14,831 and you're on Newfoundland property now.
- 00:15:14,956 --> 00:15:16,374 Get off before I have you arrested.
- 00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:18,877 Oh! This isn't over! Not by a long shot!
- 00:15:19,002 --> 00:15:21,630 I'll fix you! I'll fix all of you!
- 00:15:21,755 --> 00:15:23,465 Ooh. That was a close call.
- 00:15:23,590 --> 00:15:24,841 Thank you, kind Newfie.
- 00:15:24,966 --> 00:15:27,510 God damn it, we need to get to the new prime minister now!
- 00:15:27,636 --> 00:15:29,137 Oh, yeah? The prime minister, eh?
- 00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:30,931 He sure has screwed up things for Newfoundland.
- 00:15:31,056 --> 00:15:33,683 Life just hasn't been the same since he made sodomy illegal.
- 00:15:33,808 --> 00:15:34,851 Well, come with us!
- 00:15:34,976 --> 00:15:37,354 Maybe you can ask to him to take his sodomy ban away.
- 00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:39,064 Can we just get going, please?
- 00:15:39,189 --> 00:15:40,815 Yeah. Sure. Except there's just one problem.
- 00:15:40,941 --> 00:15:41,733 What?
- 00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,652 You folks is going the wrong way.
- 00:15:43,777 --> 00:15:46,321 What?! But I thought there was only one road in Canada!
- 00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,365 Yeah, and you all went the wrong direction on it.
- 00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:51,034 Oh, that's right! Ottawa is that way.
- 00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:54,120 Of course. Ottawa left, Newfoundland right.
- 00:15:54,245 --> 00:15:55,455 Oh, no!
- 00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:57,290 How could you be so stupid?!
- 00:15:57,415 --> 00:15:58,959 There's no way we can go all the way back!
- 00:15:59,084 --> 00:16:00,460 We'll never make it now!
- 00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:01,586 It's okay, boys.
- 00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:03,880 The power is inside us to get to Ottawa.
- 00:16:04,005 --> 00:16:05,590 We can wish ourselves there.
- 00:16:05,715 --> 00:16:07,801 Oh, yes. Let's wish ourselves there.
- 00:16:14,975 --> 00:16:17,185 Is it working? - Oh, God damn it!
- 00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,186 Well, I warned you, Kyle.
- 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:19,437 I told you if I missed Ch ristmas,
- 00:16:19,562 --> 00:16:20,522 we were gonna throw down.
- 00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:21,523 Well, it's on.
- 00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:23,692 We're gonna have it out right now!
- 00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:26,277 Of course, we could always take my boat, eh?
- 00:16:26,403 --> 00:16:29,781 Oh, yes! On the river, we could travel to Ottawa in no time!
- 00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:31,533 Well, come on!
- 00:16:32,534 --> 00:16:36,162 Okay. Next stop -- the new prime minister.
- 00:16:36,287 --> 00:16:38,081 Do you think we can still make it in time?
- 00:16:38,206 --> 00:16:41,501 We better, Kyle. Or you're dead.
- 00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:48,800 Here we are at the Parliament building.
- 00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:50,760 The prime minister is inside.
- 00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:53,221 Well, come on. Let's hurry! It's almost Christmas!
- 00:16:57,142 --> 00:16:58,601 Yes?
- 00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:00,395 We need to see the new prime minister.
- 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:01,771 Ha! Impossible!
- 00:17:01,896 --> 00:17:04,524 The new prime minister is not seeing anybody.
- 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:06,443 Oh, well. So much for that.
- 00:17:06,568 --> 00:17:07,444 We gave it our best,
- 00:17:07,569 --> 00:17:09,612 but I guess our best wasn't good enough, eh?
- 00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:10,697 No.
- 00:17:10,822 --> 00:17:12,198 No!
- 00:17:12,323 --> 00:17:13,616 Yes?
- 00:17:13,742 --> 00:17:15,869 Please, sir! I've traveled a long way to get here.
- 00:17:15,994 --> 00:17:17,454 He's the only person who can help me.
- 00:17:17,579 --> 00:17:19,289 The prime minister isn't here.
- 00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:21,249 He's in China on official business.
- 00:17:21,374 --> 00:17:24,252 So you might as well go home. Goodbye!
- 00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,212 Then that's it.
- 00:17:26,337 --> 00:17:28,798 I-I'm never going to get my brother back.
- 00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:32,635 And...I'm not going to get any Christmas presents.
- 00:17:32,761 --> 00:17:35,180 And I'm not gonna have a Christmas adventure.
- 00:17:35,305 --> 00:17:37,515 Mrph rmhmhm rm.
- 00:17:42,270 --> 00:17:44,856 Oh, please! Please stop crying!
- 00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:47,233 I'm gonna kill you, Kyle.
- 00:17:47,358 --> 00:17:49,194 All right. All right. I was lying!
- 00:17:49,319 --> 00:17:50,695 The prime minister <i>is</i> here.
- 00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:53,364 Really?! - Yes. Yes. Come in!
- 00:17:58,995 --> 00:18:02,707 I am the prime minister of Canada!
- 00:18:02,832 --> 00:18:04,626 What do you guys want?
- 00:18:06,086 --> 00:18:08,254 Sir, you recently passed a new law
- 00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:10,423 allowing parents who had given their children up for adoption
- 00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:11,800 to change their minds.
- 00:18:11,925 --> 00:18:14,010 - My little brother -- - Not so fast!
- 00:18:14,886 --> 00:18:16,721 Ike! - Kyle!
- 00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:19,140 Prime Minister, these are the child's Canadian parents.
- 00:18:19,265 --> 00:18:21,476 Their Canadian blood pumps through his veins.
- 00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:24,687 Would you send him to America with those war-hungry scum?
- 00:18:24,813 --> 00:18:25,897 Please, sir.
- 00:18:26,022 --> 00:18:28,274 I came because I don't think Ike belongs here.
- 00:18:28,399 --> 00:18:30,401 Family isn't about whose blood you have in you.
- 00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:32,237 Family is about the people who cared about you
- 00:18:32,362 --> 00:18:33,571 and took care of you.
- 00:18:33,696 --> 00:18:36,366 We're not the same blood, but I love my little brother.
- 00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:38,743 We've taken care of him because he needed us to.
- 00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:42,413 And that makes us more family than anything.
- 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,959 That was a great speech, guy.
- 00:18:46,084 --> 00:18:48,086 But the answer is no!
- 00:18:48,211 --> 00:18:51,923 All of my new laws will stay in effect forever!
- 00:18:52,048 --> 00:18:53,758 Ha ha! You lose, Americans!
- 00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:56,761 Then I suppose us Mounties will never get our horses.
- 00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:58,638 And we won't get our wine.
- 00:18:58,763 --> 00:19:00,515 And we can't perform sodomy, eh?
- 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,767 But <i>why</i> are you making such strange laws?
- 00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:04,811 I said go!
- 00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,649 Oh, my God! They killed Kenny!
- 00:19:09,774 --> 00:19:11,693 You...bastards.
- 00:19:11,818 --> 00:19:13,611 What -- What the hell is wrong with you?
- 00:19:13,736 --> 00:19:16,281 What kind of prime minister bases his decisions on hatred
- 00:19:16,406 --> 00:19:19,367 and takes away Mounties' horses and French people's wine?
- 00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,578 What the hell kind of prime minister are you, anyway?
- 00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:24,455 I am the prime minister of Canada!
- 00:19:24,581 --> 00:19:27,000 I can do whatever I...
- 00:19:27,917 --> 00:19:28,751 Uh-oh.
- 00:19:28,877 --> 00:19:31,045 Uh, don't mind that guy hiding in the spider hole.
- 00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:32,046 He's just my friend.
- 00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:33,423 What the hell?
- 00:19:33,548 --> 00:19:35,300 Hey, that looks like Saddam Hussein!
- 00:19:35,425 --> 00:19:38,011 Saddam Hussein? No! Relax, buddy.
- 00:19:38,136 --> 00:19:39,304 I'm not him.
- 00:19:39,429 --> 00:19:40,638 That explains everything.
- 00:19:40,763 --> 00:19:42,473 The new prime minister was Saddam Hussein,
- 00:19:42,599 --> 00:19:44,601 once again trying to take over our beloved Canada
- 00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:45,768 like he did before.
- 00:19:45,894 --> 00:19:47,020 Saddam Hussein?
- 00:19:47,145 --> 00:19:48,354 He was fooling us?
- 00:19:48,479 --> 00:19:49,397 Get him!
- 00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:52,192 Uh, don't shoot! I want to negotiate!
- 00:19:52,317 --> 00:19:53,359 Hey! Relax!
- 00:19:53,484 --> 00:19:54,485 Aah!
- 00:19:54,611 --> 00:19:55,486 Wait a minute!
- 00:19:55,612 --> 00:19:57,280 This means all the prime minister's new laws
- 00:19:57,405 --> 00:19:58,656 are null and void.
- 00:19:58,781 --> 00:20:00,200 We can have our horses back!
- 00:20:00,325 --> 00:20:01,826 And we can drink our wine!
- 00:20:01,951 --> 00:20:03,870 And I can sodomize me boys again.
- 00:20:03,995 --> 00:20:06,247 Young man, you must really care for Peter
- 00:20:06,372 --> 00:20:07,957 to have come all this way.
- 00:20:08,082 --> 00:20:10,210 Perhaps we were wrong to try and take Peter back.
- 00:20:10,335 --> 00:20:13,213 He doesn't belong here. He belongs with his family.
- 00:20:13,338 --> 00:20:17,383 Peter, would you like to go back to your home in Colorado?
- 00:20:24,349 --> 00:20:25,350 What is that?
- 00:20:25,475 --> 00:20:28,353 It's Christmas. We officially missed it.
- 00:20:28,478 --> 00:20:31,606 It's Christmas Day, and...I'm in Canada.
- 00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:33,566 Well, yeah. But I got my brother back.
- 00:20:33,691 --> 00:20:36,861 Yeah, you got your brother back, but I didn't get any presents!
- 00:20:36,986 --> 00:20:38,529 And what did I tell you, Kyle?!
- 00:20:38,655 --> 00:20:40,531 I told you if we didn't make it back in time for Christmas,
- 00:20:40,657 --> 00:20:41,866 I was gonna whoop your ass, didn't I?!
- 00:20:41,991 --> 00:20:42,700 Dude, come on.
- 00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,327 Now you're gonna get it, motherfucker.
- 00:20:44,452 --> 00:20:47,330 That's right. You and me, right now, we're having it out!
- 00:20:47,455 --> 00:20:49,749 Let's go! Come on! Come on!
- 00:20:59,842 --> 00:21:02,220 Mo-o-m!
- 00:21:02,345 --> 00:21:04,681 Mo-o-o-o-m!
- 00:21:04,806 --> 00:21:05,765 Hey, come on, boys!
- 00:21:05,890 --> 00:21:09,394 You can spend Christmas with us -- Canada style!
- 00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:14,315 ♪ Ding, dong, they caught Saddam ♪
- 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:15,984 ♪ Merry Christmas to the world ♪
- 00:21:16,109 --> 00:21:18,903 ♪ Ding, dong, the Americans caught Saddam ♪
- 00:21:19,487 --> 00:21:22,240 ♪ Now Canada is free for you and you and me ♪
- 00:21:22,365 --> 00:21:25,285 ♪ It's the best Christmas present we ever got ♪
- 00:21:25,410 --> 00:21:27,078 ♪ Canadian Christmas -- It's the best ♪
- 00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:28,830 ♪ We drink and dance and show our breasts ♪
- 00:21:28,955 --> 00:21:29,747 ♪ And celebrate ♪
- 00:21:29,872 --> 00:21:32,375 ♪ Saddam Hussein's been caught ♪
- 00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:33,751 Oh, well.
- 00:21:33,876 --> 00:21:36,796 Maybe we'll get to have a Christmas adventure next year.
- 00:00:08,926 --> 00:00:12,346 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time ♪
- 00:00:12,471 --> 00:00:14,098 ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
- 00:00:14,223 --> 00:00:15,599 ♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪
- 00:00:15,725 --> 00:00:18,894 ♪ Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪
- 00:00:19,020 --> 00:00:20,730 ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
- 00:00:20,855 --> 00:00:22,356 ♪ People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor!" ♪
- 00:00:22,481 --> 00:00:25,735 ♪ Heading on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
- 00:00:25,860 --> 00:00:28,904 Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmhmhm rm!
- 00:00:29,030 --> 00:00:33,159 ♪ Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine ♪
- 00:00:36,996 --> 00:00:39,373 ♪ Hanukkah, Hanukkah ♪
- 00:00:39,498 --> 00:00:41,375 ♪ Sivivon, sov, sov ♪
- 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:42,626 I got to go tinkle. - ♪ Sov, sov, sov ♪
- 00:00:42,752 --> 00:00:43,711 No, Ike. Shh! - ♪ Sov, sov, sov ♪
- 00:00:43,836 --> 00:00:46,505 ♪ Ma nayim vi-tov ♪
- 00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:49,216 We thank God for our blessings this Hanukkah.
- 00:00:49,341 --> 00:00:52,178 Our little family is so loving and perfect,
- 00:00:52,303 --> 00:00:54,388 and nothing will ever tear us apart.
- 00:00:54,513 --> 00:00:55,890 [ Doorbell rings ]
- 00:00:56,015 --> 00:00:57,683 I'll get it.
- 00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:01,103 Gerald Broflovski?
- 00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:02,063 Yes.
- 00:01:02,188 --> 00:01:04,565 My name is Harry Gints, and this is my wife, Elise.
- 00:01:04,690 --> 00:01:06,192 We're from Canada.
- 00:01:06,317 --> 00:01:07,651 Yes. I can tell.
- 00:01:07,777 --> 00:01:10,029 My wife and I had a child a few years back,
- 00:01:10,154 --> 00:01:11,989 and we weren't ready to have a child,
- 00:01:12,114 --> 00:01:13,532 so we put him up for adoption.
- 00:01:13,657 --> 00:01:15,034 We were told that you might be the --
- 00:01:15,159 --> 00:01:17,870 Peter! Oh, God, Harry! It's our son!
- 00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:20,039 Peter, it's Mommy.
- 00:01:20,164 --> 00:01:22,083 Gerald, what the hell is going on?
- 00:01:22,208 --> 00:01:24,251 Uh, I'm not sure.
- 00:01:24,376 --> 00:01:26,087 It was a tough time for us.
- 00:01:26,212 --> 00:01:27,755 It was a tough time for all of Canada.
- 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:30,508 The whole country was devastated by the Cola Wars.
- 00:01:30,633 --> 00:01:32,593 It just seemed we couldn't take care of a baby.
- 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:35,054 So we put him up for adoption, but as the years passed,
- 00:01:35,179 --> 00:01:37,556 I-I just felt an emptiness in my heart.
- 00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:39,725 Oh, it's so good to see him!
- 00:01:39,850 --> 00:01:42,603 Well, we wish you all the best, Mr. And Mrs. Gints.
- 00:01:42,728 --> 00:01:45,481 But to be honest, I think it would be best for Ike
- 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:47,650 if you didn't come around again.
- 00:01:47,775 --> 00:01:49,401 I don't think you understand.
- 00:01:49,527 --> 00:01:51,070 We didn't come to visit Peter.
- 00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:52,696 We came to take him back.
- 00:01:52,822 --> 00:01:53,781 What?
- 00:01:53,906 --> 00:01:56,075 We want to take Peter home to Canada.
- 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:57,243 Are you crazy?!
- 00:01:57,368 --> 00:01:58,869 Look, you gave Ike up.
- 00:01:58,994 --> 00:02:00,663 You can't just change your mind!
- 00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:02,289 Changing your mind is a Canadian custom
- 00:02:02,414 --> 00:02:03,457 that we hold quite dear.
- 00:02:03,582 --> 00:02:05,584 And besides, the new Canadian prime minister
- 00:02:05,709 --> 00:02:07,711 has issued a decree that all adopted Canadians
- 00:02:07,837 --> 00:02:09,421 must be returned home.
- 00:02:09,547 --> 00:02:11,382 The new Canadian prime minister?
- 00:02:11,507 --> 00:02:13,425 Look, Ike is our son now!
- 00:02:13,551 --> 00:02:14,927 He doesn't belong here.
- 00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:17,012 He belongs in Canada with his own kind.
- 00:02:17,138 --> 00:02:18,472 I think you'd better leave.
- 00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:20,141 Please, don't make this any harder for Peter.
- 00:02:20,266 --> 00:02:21,517 Harder for Peter?!
- 00:02:21,642 --> 00:02:22,810 You two just blow in here
- 00:02:22,935 --> 00:02:24,645 and say you're gonna haul him back to Canada,
- 00:02:24,770 --> 00:02:26,480 and <i>we 're</i> being hard on Peter?!
- 00:02:26,605 --> 00:02:27,523 We're prepared to go to court.
- 00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:28,941 We had hoped it wouldn't come to that.
- 00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:31,235 Well, you bet your ass it'll come to that!
- 00:02:33,237 --> 00:02:35,447 JUDGE: I'm sorry to say that my hands are tied.
- 00:02:35,573 --> 00:02:36,907 The new prime minister of Canada
- 00:02:37,032 --> 00:02:39,160 has authority this court cannot override.
- 00:02:39,285 --> 00:02:41,954 By Canadian law, I must award custody of the child
- 00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,372 to his birth parents.
- 00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:45,249 Yes! - Yes! Yes!
- 00:02:45,374 --> 00:02:46,000 No!
- 00:02:46,125 --> 00:02:48,252 Ike's not my little brother anymore?
- 00:02:48,377 --> 00:02:49,628 Gerald, do something!
- 00:02:49,753 --> 00:02:51,297 There's nothing I can do.
- 00:02:51,422 --> 00:02:52,882 [ Down-tempo music plays ]
- 00:02:53,007 --> 00:02:55,342 [ Sobbing ] - Goodbye, Ike.
- 00:02:55,467 --> 00:02:58,095 You...be a good boy, huh?
- 00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:01,682 You -- You remember all the things we taught you.
- 00:03:03,809 --> 00:03:06,687 Ike...you'll always be my little brother, okay?
- 00:03:06,812 --> 00:03:08,522 Come on, Peter. We should get going.
- 00:03:08,647 --> 00:03:10,482 No.
- 00:03:10,608 --> 00:03:12,109 Peter, you must come with Mommy and Daddy.
- 00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:14,195 No, no, no, no, no!
- 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:16,405 I have some chocolate.
- 00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,157 Chocolate!
- 00:03:19,909 --> 00:03:21,493 We're going to take good care of him.
- 00:03:21,619 --> 00:03:22,828 You'd better.
- 00:03:34,215 --> 00:03:37,051 Dad? Can't we talk to this new Canadian prime minister?
- 00:03:37,176 --> 00:03:38,719 If he knew the situation, he might --
- 00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:41,639 Oh, Kyle, appealing to the prime minister of Canada
- 00:03:41,764 --> 00:03:45,476 would take time and money we don't have.
- 00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:50,272 Dude, look at that.
- 00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:53,317 The Sprinkle Time Make Your Own Marshmallow Factory.
- 00:03:53,442 --> 00:03:55,569 I'm definitely asking for that for Christmas.
- 00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:57,655 I'm gonna tell my parents to get me that John Elway doll
- 00:03:57,780 --> 00:04:00,324 with the karate-chop action.
- 00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:02,243 Guys. Guys, I need your help.
- 00:04:02,368 --> 00:04:03,285 Sure, dude.
- 00:04:03,410 --> 00:04:04,995 It's been a week since Ike's been gone,
- 00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:06,580 and every day my parents seem worse.
- 00:04:06,705 --> 00:04:07,998 I have to try to go to Canada
- 00:04:08,123 --> 00:04:09,917 and speak with the new Canadian prime minister.
- 00:04:10,042 --> 00:04:11,126 But I can't do it alone.
- 00:04:11,252 --> 00:04:13,420 We can't go to Canada, dumb-ass! It's Christmas!
- 00:04:13,545 --> 00:04:16,090 Yeah. What if we miss out on some great Christmas adventure?
- 00:04:16,215 --> 00:04:17,800 Please, you guys. You don't understand.
- 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,176 My family is devastated.
- 00:04:19,301 --> 00:04:21,095 My mom just walks around the house like a zombie,
- 00:04:21,220 --> 00:04:22,846 and my dad can't stop crying.
- 00:04:22,972 --> 00:04:24,598 Well, I didn't want to say anything, Kyle,
- 00:04:24,723 --> 00:04:26,433 but I think maybe this is what your family gets
- 00:04:26,558 --> 00:04:28,185 for being Jewish at Christmastime.
- 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:29,103 Dude, Cartman.
- 00:04:29,228 --> 00:04:31,981 I'm just saying maybe Jesus is having a little revenge.
- 00:04:32,106 --> 00:04:34,275 I found the number of a really cheap airline to Canada.
- 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,693 If we go as soon as possible --
- 00:04:35,818 --> 00:04:37,820 Dude, we just can't up and go to Canada.
- 00:04:37,945 --> 00:04:39,488 They're about to light the Christmas tree.
- 00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:42,074 Maybe you can get your brother back some other way.
- 00:04:45,536 --> 00:04:47,288 Kyle, I just want you to know,
- 00:04:47,413 --> 00:04:48,956 if it were any other time of the year,
- 00:04:49,081 --> 00:04:51,083 I still wouldn't help you.
- 00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:56,338 ALL: Three! Two! One!
- 00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:59,091 [ Cheers and applause ]
- 00:04:59,216 --> 00:05:00,926 As we celebrate this glorious time,
- 00:05:01,051 --> 00:05:03,012 we can't forget those families who are suffering.
- 00:05:03,137 --> 00:05:05,431 As many of you know, the Broflovski family
- 00:05:05,556 --> 00:05:07,725 has recently had their child torn away from them.
- 00:05:07,850 --> 00:05:11,186 As a community, we must do all we can to ease their pain.
- 00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:13,397 Are there any suggestions how we might help?
- 00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:18,569 How about we get rid of all the Mexicans?
- 00:05:19,945 --> 00:05:21,280 Mr. Garrison, every Christmas
- 00:05:21,405 --> 00:05:23,032 you suggest we get rid of all the Mexicans,
- 00:05:23,157 --> 00:05:25,075 and every Christmas we tell you no.
- 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:26,368 Rats!
- 00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:28,996 The Broflovskis need money to appeal their case
- 00:05:29,121 --> 00:05:30,497 to the new Canadian prime minister.
- 00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:33,000 What if this Christmas, instead of buying presents,
- 00:05:33,125 --> 00:05:36,128 we all use that money to give to the Broflovskis?
- 00:05:36,253 --> 00:05:37,713 Ha! Yeah, right!
- 00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:40,090 Like our parents aren't gonna buy us presents for Christmas.
- 00:05:40,215 --> 00:05:42,468 That's a great idea, Chef. - What?
- 00:05:42,593 --> 00:05:44,678 Yeah. Who needs more stuff, anyway?
- 00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:47,598 This Christmas we can do something that really matters!
- 00:05:47,723 --> 00:05:49,016 Dad, don't get carried away.
- 00:05:49,141 --> 00:05:50,017 Then it's settled.
- 00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:51,685 This year, we'll give all our Christmas money
- 00:05:51,810 --> 00:05:54,188 to the Broflovskis in hopes that they may someday
- 00:05:54,313 --> 00:05:55,856 have their child returned to them.
- 00:05:55,981 --> 00:05:57,399 [ Crowd cheering ]
- 00:05:57,524 --> 00:06:00,027 No. No. This can't be happening!
- 00:06:01,195 --> 00:06:04,406 [ Crying ]
- 00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:06,116 [ Down-tempo music plays ]
- 00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:07,785 You fucking asshole!
- 00:06:07,910 --> 00:06:09,953 This is all your fault! - What?
- 00:06:10,079 --> 00:06:12,623 Everyone's gonna be charitable and give money to your family
- 00:06:12,748 --> 00:06:14,375 instead of buying Christmas presents!
- 00:06:14,500 --> 00:06:16,877 You fucking Jews ruined Christmas again!
- 00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:18,545 Aah! - Whoa. Whoa. Cartman.
- 00:06:18,670 --> 00:06:20,714 It wasn't enough for you people to kill Jesus!
- 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:22,925 Now you have to kill Christmas, too, huh?!
- 00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:24,927 Cartman, calm down! - Is that true?
- 00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:27,346 It's true, dude. Christmas is ruined.
- 00:06:27,471 --> 00:06:29,098 This is it, Kyle. You and me.
- 00:06:29,223 --> 00:06:30,974 We're throwing down right now.
- 00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:33,268 I'm sorry, you guys, but there is something we can do.
- 00:06:33,394 --> 00:06:35,979 We can go to Canada and see the prime minister like I said.
- 00:06:36,105 --> 00:06:37,773 If we can change <i>his</i> mind before Christmas,
- 00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:39,858 then your parents won't have to give my family money.
- 00:06:39,983 --> 00:06:41,527 You really think if we go to Canada,
- 00:06:41,652 --> 00:06:42,778 we might still get presents?
- 00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:43,862 It's worth a shot.
- 00:06:43,987 --> 00:06:45,781 Come on, you guys. We can do this.
- 00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:46,782 Oh, all right.
- 00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,826 But we'd better not miss out on any great Christmas adventures.
- 00:06:48,951 --> 00:06:50,828 We'll get back in time for a Christmas adventure.
- 00:06:50,953 --> 00:06:52,663 Fine, but if it doesn't work,
- 00:06:52,788 --> 00:06:54,248 you and me are gonna have it out, Kyle.
- 00:06:54,373 --> 00:06:55,958 Once and for all.
- 00:06:56,083 --> 00:06:59,420 [ "Greensleeves" plays ]
- 00:06:59,545 --> 00:07:01,463 No business.
- 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:06,301 Christmastime come and nobody want to eat Chinese food.
- 00:07:07,344 --> 00:07:09,930 Looks like I might as well close.
- 00:07:10,055 --> 00:07:11,849 [ Telephone rings ]
- 00:07:11,974 --> 00:07:15,477 Oh, boy! Some business! Finally!
- 00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:17,938 Hello! Chitty Wok! Take order, please!
- 00:07:18,063 --> 00:07:19,314 Oh. I must have the wrong number.
- 00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:20,941 We were trying to reach City Airlines.
- 00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:23,068 Oh. Oh, yes. Just a moment, please.
- 00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:26,530 Hello. Chitty Airlines.
- 00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:27,990 Can I help you take order, please?
- 00:07:28,115 --> 00:07:30,701 Uh, we need to go to Canada as soon as possible.
- 00:07:30,826 --> 00:07:33,579 Ooh, Canada. Okay. That's pretty far.
- 00:07:33,704 --> 00:07:35,956 Gonna cost a lot of money. Let's see.
- 00:07:36,081 --> 00:07:37,833 How many people? - Four.
- 00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,919 Okay. Four people, Canada, cost a lot of money.
- 00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:44,673 Gonna be about 6,500 dorrah.
- 00:07:45,299 --> 00:07:46,967 How about 50 dorrah?
- 00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:49,136 50 dorrah?!
- 00:07:49,261 --> 00:07:52,598 You flying to Canada! Cost at least 3,000 dorrah!
- 00:07:52,723 --> 00:07:54,433 55 dorrah.
- 00:07:54,558 --> 00:07:57,478 Hey! Stop wasting my time with 55 dorrah.
- 00:07:57,603 --> 00:08:01,523 No way I take my plane to Canada for less than 1,000 dorrah!
- 00:08:01,648 --> 00:08:03,650 Okay. 60 dorrah.
- 00:08:03,775 --> 00:08:06,403 62 dorrah. - Okay.
- 00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:08,155 Okay. Meet me Park County Airfield.
- 00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:10,616 Yellow Cessna. Tail number 432G.
- 00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:11,700 Got it!
- 00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,035 [ Giggles ]
- 00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,537 Never try to barter with a Chinese man.
- 00:08:15,662 --> 00:08:17,372 [ Mid-tempo music plays ]
- 00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:20,209 We have exactly 52 hours before Christmas.
- 00:08:20,334 --> 00:08:22,169 That means we have to be back in 28 hours
- 00:08:22,294 --> 00:08:24,838 to still give our parents 24 hours to buy us presents.
- 00:08:24,963 --> 00:08:26,256 Synchronize watches on my mark.
- 00:08:26,381 --> 00:08:27,257 Mark.
- 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,552 Hello! Welcome Chitty Airline!
- 00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:33,347 Oh, no. No, no, no, no. I am not flying in that thing.
- 00:08:33,472 --> 00:08:34,348 Mrph.
- 00:08:34,473 --> 00:08:36,475 Why not? - Mrph rmhmhm rm!
- 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:38,644 You're not gonna die, Kenny! Don't be stupid!
- 00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:39,645 You guys go get Ike.
- 00:08:39,770 --> 00:08:41,605 Kenny and I will stay here and watch the fort.
- 00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:42,648 No. You're both coming.
- 00:08:42,773 --> 00:08:44,233 Do you care about Christmas or not?
- 00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:45,651 Of course I care about Christmas!
- 00:08:45,776 --> 00:08:47,319 Oh, Christ on a stick!
- 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,990 Oh, dude, it smells like kung pao chicken in here.
- 00:08:52,115 --> 00:08:53,909 Okay. Welcome aboard Chitty Airline.
- 00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:55,536 This is your captain speaking.
- 00:08:55,661 --> 00:08:57,162 Looking about two-hour flight.
- 00:08:57,287 --> 00:08:59,081 I'll be turning on the seat belt sign now.
- 00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:00,541 If your seats <i>had</i> seat belts,
- 00:09:00,666 --> 00:09:02,334 this is the time you would fasten them.
- 00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:06,046 Please sit back, relax, and enjoy your Chitty flight.
- 00:09:06,171 --> 00:09:09,049 [ Mid-tempo music plays ]
- 00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:15,013 KYLE: All right! We're going to Canada!
- 00:09:15,138 --> 00:09:16,682 CARTMAN: Weak.
- 00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:20,102 [ Engine humming ]
- 00:09:29,403 --> 00:09:31,905 [ Dramatic music plays ] - [ Engine sputters ]
- 00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:33,907 Hey. Turn off the light.
- 00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:36,243 Whoa. Wait! Oh. Oh!
- 00:09:36,368 --> 00:09:37,953 What's going on?
- 00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:40,914 Hello from the cockpit. This is your captain speaking.
- 00:09:41,039 --> 00:09:43,333 As you can see, it appears that we are going down.
- 00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:45,877 Now would be a good time to reflect on your life
- 00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:48,046 and pray to whatever deity you believe in.
- 00:09:48,171 --> 00:09:49,881 Thank you for flying Chitty Airlines.
- 00:09:50,007 --> 00:09:51,383 We know you have a choice in airlines,
- 00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,468 and it looks like you made the wrong one.
- 00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:55,887 Hey! Where the hell are you going?!
- 00:09:57,389 --> 00:10:00,309 Do something, Kyle! - I'm trying!
- 00:10:00,434 --> 00:10:03,061 Look out! - Mrphhhh!
- 00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:09,109 [ Birds chirping ]
- 00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:14,656 You guys.
- 00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:17,117 I don't think we're in America anymore.
- 00:10:20,203 --> 00:10:23,707 Excuse me! Uh, is this an invasion?
- 00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:25,459 No.
- 00:10:25,584 --> 00:10:27,461 Oh, thank heavens! It's okay.
- 00:10:27,586 --> 00:10:28,920 Everyone, it's not an invasion!
- 00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:30,964 [ Indistinct shouting ]
- 00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,799 I was sure when that plane fell from the sky
- 00:10:32,924 --> 00:10:33,967 that we had an invader!
- 00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:35,594 Hey, we're in Canada!
- 00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:37,220 Well, of course you are!
- 00:10:37,346 --> 00:10:39,556 And Canada, friends, welcomes you!
- 00:10:40,724 --> 00:10:42,184 ♪ Welcome, friends, to Canada ♪
- 00:10:42,309 --> 00:10:43,894 ♪ Canada, friends, loves you ♪
- 00:10:44,019 --> 00:10:45,520 ♪ We're just like any other country ♪
- 00:10:45,646 --> 00:10:46,938 ♪ Without the big to-do ♪
- 00:10:47,064 --> 00:10:48,649 We greet thee with pleasure.
- 00:10:48,774 --> 00:10:50,359 But one question, if we may.
- 00:10:50,484 --> 00:10:54,071 What brings you folks to Canada? Why are you here today?
- 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:58,325 Uh, my adopted brother got taken back here to Canada.
- 00:10:58,450 --> 00:11:00,869 So we want to talk to the new Canadian prime minister
- 00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,204 about getting him back.
- 00:11:02,329 --> 00:11:03,872 ♪ His brother's here somewhere ♪
- 00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,374 ♪ The question is, is where? ♪
- 00:11:05,499 --> 00:11:07,209 ♪ He must talk to the new prime minister here ♪
- 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,627 ♪ To get his brother home back there ♪
- 00:11:08,752 --> 00:11:10,420 Oh, Jesus Christ.
- 00:11:10,545 --> 00:11:12,714 Hey! What the hell is going on?!
- 00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:15,384 It's Scott! - [ Crowd screaming ]
- 00:11:15,509 --> 00:11:17,344 Aah! Get away!
- 00:11:17,469 --> 00:11:19,596 Who damaged our beloved Canadian land?
- 00:11:19,721 --> 00:11:21,932 Who's that? - That's Scott. He's a dick!
- 00:11:22,974 --> 00:11:25,727 Aha! Americans! I should have known!
- 00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:27,187 You think you're the police of the world!
- 00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:28,271 You think you own Canada!
- 00:11:28,397 --> 00:11:30,774 Well, you aren't welcome here. Get out now!
- 00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,943 Oh, no, you don't, Scott. Leave these boys alone.
- 00:11:33,068 --> 00:11:34,778 This isn't over, you American scum.
- 00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:36,780 I swear to God, you'll rue this day!
- 00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:40,409 God! What a dick!
- 00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:42,411 Look, we don't have a lot of time here, okay?
- 00:11:42,536 --> 00:11:44,579 Can you just tell us where the new prime minister is?
- 00:11:44,705 --> 00:11:46,873 The new prime minister doesn't live in this part of Canada.
- 00:11:46,998 --> 00:11:48,041 He's in Ottawa.
- 00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:50,210 [ Indistinct conversations ]
- 00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:52,462 So, how do we get to Ottawa? - Oh, that's easy.
- 00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:54,047 You just have to follow the road.
- 00:11:54,172 --> 00:11:55,173 Which road?
- 00:11:55,298 --> 00:11:58,135 This is Canada. We only have one road.
- 00:11:58,260 --> 00:12:00,137 ♪ Follow the only road ♪
- 00:12:00,262 --> 00:12:01,930 ♪ Follow the only road ♪
- 00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:03,598 ♪ To go anywhere in Canada ♪
- 00:12:03,724 --> 00:12:05,308 ♪ You just follow the only road ♪
- 00:12:05,434 --> 00:12:07,185 ♪ There's only one road in Canada ♪
- 00:12:07,310 --> 00:12:08,937 ♪ We call it the road, the only road ♪
- 00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:12,065 ♪ Hip-hip hooray! Let's hear it for our road ♪
- 00:12:12,190 --> 00:12:14,818 ♪ It's paved and wide and up to code ♪
- 00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:15,652 All right, dude.
- 00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:17,028 Let's get the hell out of here. - Word.
- 00:12:17,154 --> 00:12:18,613 ♪ You're off to see the prime minister ♪
- 00:12:18,739 --> 00:12:20,574 ♪ The prime minister of Canada ♪
- 00:12:20,699 --> 00:12:21,825 Goodbye, friends!
- 00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:23,618 Good luck with the new prime minister!
- 00:12:23,744 --> 00:12:26,037 And remember to watch out for Scott. He's a dick!
- 00:12:26,163 --> 00:12:27,038 Goodbye! - So long!
- 00:12:27,164 --> 00:12:29,374 See you! - Watch out for Scott!
- 00:12:29,499 --> 00:12:31,042 [ Birds chirping ]
- 00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:32,836 20 hours until Christmas.
- 00:12:32,961 --> 00:12:36,089 Our parents still have time to buy us presents if we hurry.
- 00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:38,842 Ahoy there, travelers! - Who are you?
- 00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:42,304 I am Rick, the proud Canadian Mountie.
- 00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:44,431 [ Bleating ]
- 00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:47,017 I thought Mounties were supposed to ride horses.
- 00:12:47,726 --> 00:12:49,352 Yes. Yes, we are.
- 00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:52,230 But our funding has been cut, and now we're forced to ride...
- 00:12:52,355 --> 00:12:54,149 [ Bleats ]
- 00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:56,276 We're in a rush to see the new prime minister.
- 00:12:56,401 --> 00:12:58,361 [ Gasps ] You're going to see the new prime minister?
- 00:12:58,487 --> 00:13:00,197 Oh, I would so like to meet him myself.
- 00:13:00,322 --> 00:13:02,532 It's his strange new laws that took our horses away.
- 00:13:02,657 --> 00:13:03,950 Perhaps I will go with you.
- 00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:05,535 That's okay. We'd rather go by ourselves.
- 00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,204 Follow me this way!
- 00:13:07,329 --> 00:13:08,663 ♪ We're going to see the prime minister ♪
- 00:13:08,789 --> 00:13:10,874 ♪ The prime minister of Canada ♪
- 00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:14,544 Power-hungry Americans. I'll fix you!
- 00:13:17,464 --> 00:13:20,300 Oh, Jesus. 18 hours. We're running out of time.
- 00:13:20,425 --> 00:13:21,676 All right, boys. Prepare yourselves.
- 00:13:21,802 --> 00:13:23,678 We're about to enter French Canada.
- 00:13:23,804 --> 00:13:25,222 French Canada?
- 00:13:25,347 --> 00:13:28,058 ♪ There's no Canada like French Canada ♪
- 00:13:28,183 --> 00:13:30,310 ♪ It's the best Canada in the land ♪
- 00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:32,854 ♪ The other Canada is hardly Canada ♪
- 00:13:32,979 --> 00:13:34,856 ♪ If you lived here for a day, you'd understand ♪
- 00:13:34,981 --> 00:13:38,735 Ha ha ha! Welcome to French Canada!
- 00:13:38,860 --> 00:13:40,821 We have everything your heart could desire.
- 00:13:40,946 --> 00:13:44,032 Trapezes, trampolines, and lots and lots of cheese.
- 00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:46,243 Would you like a mustache?
- 00:13:46,368 --> 00:13:47,202 Just stay calm, boys.
- 00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,079 French Canadians are a little odd.
- 00:13:49,204 --> 00:13:51,665 Uh, we're just passing through to see the new prime minister.
- 00:13:51,790 --> 00:13:54,543 Well, first you must answer that phone.
- 00:13:54,668 --> 00:13:56,670 Ring, ring. Ring, ring.
- 00:13:56,795 --> 00:13:58,380 We don't have time for this.
- 00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:00,173 You cannot pass through French Canada
- 00:14:00,298 --> 00:14:02,050 unless you take that phone call!
- 00:14:02,175 --> 00:14:03,885 Ring, ring. Ring, ring.
- 00:14:05,929 --> 00:14:06,888 Hello.
- 00:14:07,013 --> 00:14:09,641 Hello! If you are going to see the new prime minister,
- 00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:11,101 then I want to go with you.
- 00:14:11,226 --> 00:14:12,310 He has passed a new law
- 00:14:12,435 --> 00:14:14,855 forbidding us French Canadians to drink wine!
- 00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:16,773 How can the French not drink wine?
- 00:14:16,898 --> 00:14:17,774 Travesty!
- 00:14:17,899 --> 00:14:19,317 Okay. You can come with us.
- 00:14:19,442 --> 00:14:22,571 Ho ho! Very good! Let us make haste!
- 00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:25,323 ♪ There's no Canada like French Canada ♪
- 00:14:25,448 --> 00:14:27,868 ♪ It's the best Canada in the land ♪
- 00:14:27,993 --> 00:14:30,287 ♪ And the other Canada is a bullshit Canada ♪
- 00:14:30,412 --> 00:14:33,123 ♪ If you lived here for a day, you'd understand ♪
- 00:14:33,248 --> 00:14:35,667 I think you'd understand.
- 00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:37,460 You understand.
- 00:14:43,300 --> 00:14:46,386 Oh, my! This certainly is a desolate place.
- 00:14:46,511 --> 00:14:48,889 It reminds me of death and fear.
- 00:14:49,014 --> 00:14:51,725 How much further to Ottawa? Christmas is only 12 hours away!
- 00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:53,560 We must be very close now.
- 00:14:53,685 --> 00:14:55,353 Hey! What are you doing?
- 00:14:55,478 --> 00:14:56,187 [ Screams ]
- 00:14:56,313 --> 00:14:57,981 Oh, no. It's Scott!
- 00:14:58,106 --> 00:14:59,858 What are you two doing helping these Americans?
- 00:14:59,983 --> 00:15:01,651 Don't you know America thinks it owns Canada
- 00:15:01,776 --> 00:15:03,069 along with the rest of the world?
- 00:15:03,194 --> 00:15:04,487 You're a dick, Scott!
- 00:15:04,613 --> 00:15:05,488 <i>You're</i> a dick!
- 00:15:05,614 --> 00:15:07,866 And by helping Americans, you're just as smelly as they are!
- 00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:09,242 Now I'm going to get you!
- 00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:10,452 Not so fast, Scott.
- 00:15:10,577 --> 00:15:11,661 Who the hell are you?
- 00:15:11,786 --> 00:15:13,121 I am Steve the Newfoundlander,
- 00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:14,831 and you're on Newfoundland property now.
- 00:15:14,956 --> 00:15:16,374 Get off before I have you arrested.
- 00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:18,877 Oh! This isn't over! Not by a long shot!
- 00:15:19,002 --> 00:15:21,630 I'll fix you! I'll fix all of you!
- 00:15:21,755 --> 00:15:23,465 Ooh. That was a close call.
- 00:15:23,590 --> 00:15:24,841 Thank you, kind Newfie.
- 00:15:24,966 --> 00:15:27,510 God damn it, we need to get to the new prime minister now!
- 00:15:27,636 --> 00:15:29,137 Oh, yeah? The prime minister, eh?
- 00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:30,931 He sure has screwed up things for Newfoundland.
- 00:15:31,056 --> 00:15:33,683 Life just hasn't been the same since he made sodomy illegal.
- 00:15:33,808 --> 00:15:34,851 Well, come with us!
- 00:15:34,976 --> 00:15:37,354 Maybe you can ask to him to take his sodomy ban away.
- 00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:39,064 Can we just get going, please?
- 00:15:39,189 --> 00:15:40,815 Yeah. Sure. Except there's just one problem.
- 00:15:40,941 --> 00:15:41,733 What?
- 00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,652 You folks is going the wrong way.
- 00:15:43,777 --> 00:15:46,321 What?! But I thought there was only one road in Canada!
- 00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,365 Yeah, and you all went the wrong direction on it.
- 00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:51,034 Oh, that's right! Ottawa is that way.
- 00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:54,120 Of course. Ottawa left, Newfoundland right.
- 00:15:54,245 --> 00:15:55,455 Oh, no!
- 00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:57,290 How could you be so stupid?!
- 00:15:57,415 --> 00:15:58,959 There's no way we can go all the way back!
- 00:15:59,084 --> 00:16:00,460 We'll never make it now!
- 00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:01,586 It's okay, boys.
- 00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:03,880 The power is inside us to get to Ottawa.
- 00:16:04,005 --> 00:16:05,590 We can wish ourselves there.
- 00:16:05,715 --> 00:16:07,801 Oh, yes. Let's wish ourselves there.
- 00:16:07,926 --> 00:16:10,011 [ Harp plays ]
- 00:16:11,429 --> 00:16:13,974 [ Choir vocalizing ]
- 00:16:14,975 --> 00:16:17,185 Is it working? - Oh, God damn it!
- 00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,186 Well, I warned you, Kyle.
- 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:19,437 I told you if I missed Ch ristmas,
- 00:16:19,562 --> 00:16:20,522 we were gonna throw down.
- 00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:21,523 Well, it's on.
- 00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:23,692 We're gonna have it out right now!
- 00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:26,277 Of course, we could always take my boat, eh?
- 00:16:26,403 --> 00:16:29,781 Oh, yes! On the river, we could travel to Ottawa in no time!
- 00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:31,533 Well, come on!
- 00:16:32,534 --> 00:16:36,162 Okay. Next stop -- the new prime minister.
- 00:16:36,287 --> 00:16:38,081 Do you think we can still make it in time?
- 00:16:38,206 --> 00:16:41,501 We better, Kyle. Or you're dead.
- 00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:48,800 Here we are at the Parliament building.
- 00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:50,760 The prime minister is inside.
- 00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:53,221 Well, come on. Let's hurry! It's almost Christmas!
- 00:16:57,142 --> 00:16:58,601 Yes?
- 00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:00,395 We need to see the new prime minister.
- 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:01,771 Ha! Impossible!
- 00:17:01,896 --> 00:17:04,524 The new prime minister is not seeing anybody.
- 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:06,443 Oh, well. So much for that.
- 00:17:06,568 --> 00:17:07,444 We gave it our best,
- 00:17:07,569 --> 00:17:09,612 but I guess our best wasn't good enough, eh?
- 00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:10,697 No.
- 00:17:10,822 --> 00:17:12,198 No!
- 00:17:12,323 --> 00:17:13,616 Yes?
- 00:17:13,742 --> 00:17:15,869 Please, sir! I've traveled a long way to get here.
- 00:17:15,994 --> 00:17:17,454 He's the only person who can help me.
- 00:17:17,579 --> 00:17:19,289 The prime minister isn't here.
- 00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:21,249 He's in China on official business.
- 00:17:21,374 --> 00:17:24,252 So you might as well go home. Goodbye!
- 00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,212 Then that's it.
- 00:17:26,337 --> 00:17:28,798 I-I'm never going to get my brother back.
- 00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:32,635 And...I'm not going to get any Christmas presents.
- 00:17:32,761 --> 00:17:35,180 And I'm not gonna have a Christmas adventure.
- 00:17:35,305 --> 00:17:37,515 Mrph rmhmhm rm.
- 00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:39,642 [All crying ]
- 00:17:41,102 --> 00:17:42,145 [ Sobs ]
- 00:17:42,270 --> 00:17:44,856 Oh, please! Please stop crying!
- 00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:47,233 [ Crying ] I'm gonna kill you, Kyle.
- 00:17:47,358 --> 00:17:49,194 All right. All right. I was lying!
- 00:17:49,319 --> 00:17:50,695 The prime minister <i>is</i> here.
- 00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:53,364 Really?! - Yes. Yes. Come in!
- 00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:55,700 [ Fanfare plays ]
- 00:17:58,995 --> 00:18:02,707 I am the prime minister of Canada!
- 00:18:02,832 --> 00:18:04,626 What do you guys want?
- 00:18:06,086 --> 00:18:08,254 Sir, you recently passed a new law
- 00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:10,423 allowing parents who had given their children up for adoption
- 00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:11,800 to change their minds.
- 00:18:11,925 --> 00:18:14,010 My little brother -- - SCOTT: Not so fast!
- 00:18:14,886 --> 00:18:16,721 Ike! - Kyle!
- 00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:19,140 Prime Minister, these are the child's Canadian parents.
- 00:18:19,265 --> 00:18:21,476 Their Canadian blood pumps through his veins.
- 00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:24,687 Would you send him to America with those war-hungry scum?
- 00:18:24,813 --> 00:18:25,897 Please, sir.
- 00:18:26,022 --> 00:18:28,274 I came because I don't think Ike belongs here.
- 00:18:28,399 --> 00:18:30,401 Family isn't about whose blood you have in you.
- 00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:32,237 Family is about the people who cared about you
- 00:18:32,362 --> 00:18:33,571 and took care of you.
- 00:18:33,696 --> 00:18:36,366 We're not the same blood, but I love my little brother.
- 00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:38,743 We've taken care of him because he needed us to.
- 00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:42,413 And that makes us more family than anything.
- 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,959 That was a great speech, guy.
- 00:18:46,084 --> 00:18:48,086 But the answer is no!
- 00:18:48,211 --> 00:18:51,923 All of my new laws will stay in effect forever!
- 00:18:52,048 --> 00:18:53,758 Ha ha! You lose, Americans!
- 00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:56,761 Then I suppose us Mounties will never get our horses.
- 00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:58,638 And we won't get our wine.
- 00:18:58,763 --> 00:19:00,515 And we can't perform sodomy, eh?
- 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,767 But <i>why</i> are you making such strange laws?
- 00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:04,811 I said go!
- 00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,649 Oh, my God! They killed Kenny!
- 00:19:09,774 --> 00:19:11,693 You...bastards.
- 00:19:11,818 --> 00:19:13,611 What -- What the hell is wrong with you?
- 00:19:13,736 --> 00:19:16,281 What kind of prime minister bases his decisions on hatred
- 00:19:16,406 --> 00:19:19,367 and takes away Mounties' horses and French people's wine?
- 00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,578 What the hell kind of prime minister are you, anyway?
- 00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:24,455 I am the prime minister of Canada!
- 00:19:24,581 --> 00:19:27,000 I can do whatever I...
- 00:19:27,917 --> 00:19:28,751 Uh-oh.
- 00:19:28,877 --> 00:19:31,045 Uh, don't mind that guy hiding in the spider hole.
- 00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:32,046 He's just my friend.
- 00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:33,423 What the hell?
- 00:19:33,548 --> 00:19:35,300 Hey, that looks like Saddam Hussein!
- 00:19:35,425 --> 00:19:38,011 Saddam Hussein? No! Relax, buddy.
- 00:19:38,136 --> 00:19:39,304 I'm not him.
- 00:19:39,429 --> 00:19:40,638 That explains everything.
- 00:19:40,763 --> 00:19:42,473 The new prime minister was Saddam Hussein,
- 00:19:42,599 --> 00:19:44,601 once again trying to take over our beloved Canada
- 00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:45,768 like he did before.
- 00:19:45,894 --> 00:19:47,020 Saddam Hussein?
- 00:19:47,145 --> 00:19:48,354 He was fooling us?
- 00:19:48,479 --> 00:19:49,397 Get him!
- 00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:52,192 Uh, don't shoot! I want to negotiate!
- 00:19:52,317 --> 00:19:53,359 Hey! Relax!
- 00:19:53,484 --> 00:19:54,485 Aah!
- 00:19:54,611 --> 00:19:55,486 Wait a minute!
- 00:19:55,612 --> 00:19:57,280 This means all the prime minister's new laws
- 00:19:57,405 --> 00:19:58,656 are null and void.
- 00:19:58,781 --> 00:20:00,200 We can have our horses back!
- 00:20:00,325 --> 00:20:01,826 And we can drink our wine!
- 00:20:01,951 --> 00:20:03,870 And I can sodomize me boys again.
- 00:20:03,995 --> 00:20:06,247 Young man, you must really care for Peter
- 00:20:06,372 --> 00:20:07,957 to have come all this way.
- 00:20:08,082 --> 00:20:10,210 Perhaps we were wrong to try and take Peter back.
- 00:20:10,335 --> 00:20:13,213 He doesn't belong here. He belongs with his family.
- 00:20:13,338 --> 00:20:17,383 Peter, would you like to go back to your home in Colorado?
- 00:20:17,508 --> 00:20:20,261 [ Down-tempo music plays ]
- 00:20:21,429 --> 00:20:24,224 [ Beeping ]
- 00:20:24,349 --> 00:20:25,350 What is that?
- 00:20:25,475 --> 00:20:28,353 It's Christmas. We officially missed it.
- 00:20:28,478 --> 00:20:31,606 It's Christmas Day, and...I'm in Canada.
- 00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:33,566 Well, yeah. But I got my brother back.
- 00:20:33,691 --> 00:20:36,861 Yeah, you got your brother back, but I didn't get any presents!
- 00:20:36,986 --> 00:20:38,529 And what did I tell you, Kyle?!
- 00:20:38,655 --> 00:20:40,531 I told you if we didn't make it back in time for Christmas,
- 00:20:40,657 --> 00:20:41,866 I was gonna whoop your ass, didn't I?!
- 00:20:41,991 --> 00:20:42,700 Dude, come on.
- 00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,327 Now you're gonna get it, motherfucker.
- 00:20:44,452 --> 00:20:47,330 That's right. You and me, right now, we're having it out!
- 00:20:47,455 --> 00:20:49,749 Let's go! Come on! Come on!
- 00:20:51,793 --> 00:20:53,920 [ Wailing ]
- 00:20:59,842 --> 00:21:02,220 Mo-o-m!
- 00:21:02,345 --> 00:21:04,681 Mo-o-o-o-m!
- 00:21:04,806 --> 00:21:05,765 Hey, come on, boys!
- 00:21:05,890 --> 00:21:09,394 You can spend Christmas with us -- Canada style!
- 00:21:09,519 --> 00:21:12,146 [ Crowd cheering ]
- 00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:14,315 ♪ Ding, dong, they caught Saddam ♪
- 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:15,984 ♪ Merry Christmas to the world ♪
- 00:21:16,109 --> 00:21:18,903 ♪ Ding, dong, the Americans caught Saddam ♪
- 00:21:19,487 --> 00:21:22,240 ♪ Now Canada is free for you and you and me ♪
- 00:21:22,365 --> 00:21:25,285 ♪ It's the best Christmas present we ever got ♪
- 00:21:25,410 --> 00:21:27,078 ♪ Canadian Christmas -- It's the best ♪
- 00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:28,830 ♪ We drink and dance and show our breasts ♪
- 00:21:28,955 --> 00:21:29,747 ♪ And celebrate ♪
- 00:21:29,872 --> 00:21:32,375 ♪ Saddam Hussein's been caught ♪
- 00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:33,751 Oh, well.
- 00:21:33,876 --> 00:21:36,796 Maybe we'll get to have a Christmas adventure next year.
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