Сумасшедшие калеки

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♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪

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♪ Humble folks

without temptation ♪

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♪ Goin' down to South Park,

gonna leave my woes behind ♪

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♪ Ample parking day or night ♪

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♪ People spouting,

"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪

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♪ Heading on up to South Park,

gonna see if I can't unwind ♪

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Mrph rmhmhm rm!

Mrph rmhmhm rm!

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♪ Come on down to South Park

and meet some friends of mine ♪

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Ladies and gentlemen,

give it up for Jimmy!

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Thank you! Wow.

What a terrific audience.

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I know what most of you

are thinking.

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"Hey, that guy stole my shoes."

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Wow. What a great audience.

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And how about this

Michael Jackson guy, huh?

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I mean, come on.

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Wow.

What a great audience.

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Uh...l-lights, please?

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Hey, Jimmy.

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Butters, w-where is everybody?

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Oh, yeah.

Well, about that.

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Christopher Reeve came to town

to do some kind of show,

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and everyone went to see him.

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Christopher Reeve?

Christopher Reeve?!

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You know, Christopher Reeve,

the guy who played Superman.

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I know who he is!

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But why is everyone ditching

my comedy show to see him?!

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W-Well, because he got crippled,

but now he can move his finger.

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He is an inspiration to us all.

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That's why everyone ditched

on your show.

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So then how come you came?

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Well, because I said I would.

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Oh, I'm a dork, huh?

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And so without further ado,

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here's the most courageous,

most amazing man on the planet,

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Christopher Reeve.

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Thank you. Thank you.

Wow. What a great audience.

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I just flew into South Park.

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Used to be

I didn't need an airplane.

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As most of you know...

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I am a strong supporter

of stem-cell research.

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Say, fellas! Thanks a lot

for going to my c-comedy show!

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We didn't go

to your comedy show.

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I know that!

I was being f-f-f-facetious!

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Well, dude.

Christopher Reeve, dude.

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Ooh! Christopher Reeve!

Whoop-de-freakin'-do!

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Dude, that's not cool.

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You shouldn't make fun

of Christopher Reeve.

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Yeah, dude, not cool.

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Though it is controversial...

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...stem-cell research

is critical...

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...in the quest for helping...

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...the disabled.

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I put together a comedy show,

and I was crippled from birth!

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Uh, whoo. Guys, I think we'd

better stay out of this one.

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Yeah, this is starting to look

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like something we shouldn't be

any part of.

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Let's go play with trucks

or something.

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Can you believe this ass wipe,

Timmy?

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Timmy!

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Why is a celebrity

who became crippled

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more important than us that were

born that way, very much?

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Ugh, Timmy!

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In the coming days...

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I will prove to the world...

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that stem-cell research

is a miracle.

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Beep, beep, beep.

Move it, Kenny! Beep.

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Hey, there, fellas.

- Oh, hey, Jimmy, hey, Timmy.

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Timmy!

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Say, would you guys like

to join our club?

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Oh, I'm sorry.

You can't.

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You aren't crippled.

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What?

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To be in our club, not only

do you have to be c-crippled,

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but you have to have been born

that way.

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You know what that means?

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No butthole Superman ass wipe

Christopher Reeve.

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That's nice, guys. We're just

gonna stay out of this one.

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Hey, wait a minute!

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You guys can't just start a club

and tell me I can't be in it!

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Sorry, able-body.

You can't join.

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Can too!

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Hey, Timmy, how many able-bodied

people does it take

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to screw in a light bulb?

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One.

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You know what you call an

able-bodied guy on the doorstep?

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Whatever his name is.

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Oh, God damn it!

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Cartman, just stay out of it.

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But they say I can't be

in their club!

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Cartman, trust me. We don't want

any part in this one.

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Hello, Mr. McGillic--

Mr. McGillicuddy.

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Hello, boys.

What can I do for you?

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Timmy and I made a T-shirt

design for our new club.

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We just came up with a name

this morning.

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Uh, boys, I don't think

you want to wear these shirts.

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Why not?

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Well, because there

already is a group

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that calls themselves The Crips,

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and I don't think

they'd like it too much.

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There's already a Crips?!

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Well, sure, they're all over

Five Points area in Denver.

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You've never heard of them?

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No, we never have.

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Are they crippled from birth,

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or are they cripple wannabes

like Christopher Reeve?

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Ooh.

I am staying out of this one.

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Can you believe it, Timmy?

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There was a group for truly

crippled people like ourselves,

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and we didn't know it.

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Timmy!

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Come on. We got to take the bus

to Five Points in Denver.

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My guest tonight

is the brilliant star

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of stage and screen,

Mr. Christopher Reeve,

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who, with the help

of stem-cell research,

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is now able to move his arms.

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Thanks for having me on again,

Larry.

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All right, Chris.

The whole world is waiting.

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Why don't you show us what stem-

cell research has done for you?

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Amazing.

Isn't that amazing, folks?

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Now, Chris,

there are some people

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who say stem-cell research

is wrong,

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that taking cells from a fetus

is unethical.

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Well, it just proves

that the public

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needs to be educated...

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...about stem-cell research.

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See, the stem cells

from a fetus, like this one,

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can form into whatever cells

of the body are damaged.

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They are the most powerful thing

on the planet.

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And how does someone

like yourself

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make use of the stem cells,

Chris?

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Well, it's very simple.

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And now you can see

my arms have better movement.

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Wow. Wow.

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Excuse me, sir.

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We're looking for a group

of people called the Crips.

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You are?

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Do you know where they meet?

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We've already tried

the rec center and the library.

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The Crips hang out in that

old warehouse down there,

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but nobody goes in there.

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Oh, it's okay.

We're Crips ourselves.

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Come on, Tim-Tim.

- Timmy!

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Well, hello, everyone.

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I'm Jim Swanson,

and this is my friend Timmy.

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Timmy!

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T-T-Timmy.

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Well, let us tell you

a little bit about ourselves.

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Timmy and I are both true Crips,

born and raised.

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We're the only Crips

in South Park, where we live,

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and we would love to join your

fa-fa-fantastic Denver chapter.

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Is they for real, man?

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We just have one question

before we join your c-club.

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Do you think it's better

to be born a Crip

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or to become a Crip later

by accident?

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The only real Crips

is born Crips, dog.

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Yeah, you can't become a Crip

by accident, fool.

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I agree.

I mean, it's like, come on!

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Why do these people

who become Crips later in life

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think they're

such great p-potatoes?

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Timmy!

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Well, we're glad you see it

our way, fellas.

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So, can we join your g-group?

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A'ight, you want to thug

with the Five Point Crips?

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Bitches, all you got to do

is pop some punk-ass Bloods.

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Well, sure.

00:07:16,603 --> 00:07:18,480

Tim and I would love to pop

some p-punk-ass Bloods.

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We're terrific at it.

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Timmy?

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I don't know, Timmy.

Just play along.

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Uh, T-Timmy!

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So you saying you're down?

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Down like a clown,

Charlie Br--

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Down like a clown,

Charlie B-Brow...

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Down like a clown,

Charlie Bah...Bah...

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Down like a clown,

Charlie B-Brown.

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♪ Kickin' it with a nigga while

I have his wife for dinner ♪

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♪ Now the silly nigga

wants to fly ♪

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♪ Buster ♪

♪ But fightin' is for chumps ♪

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♪ Didn't you know? ♪

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♪ In the 9 Joe,

it's all about the 4-4 ♪

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♪ And can't stop it

when bad apples in the bunch ♪

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Say, Timmy, did you notice

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that all the crippled people

in that club are negroes?

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Timmy!

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That's an amazing coincidence.

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I mean, there's not one crippled

colored person in South P-Park.

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Hey, you kids.

00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:05,360

Well, hello, officers.

00:08:05,486 --> 00:08:07,738

What the hell do you think

you're doing?

00:08:07,863 --> 00:08:10,616

We're going to pop

some punk-ass B-Bloods.

00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:12,284

Timmy!

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♪ Stop it, dog,

with just one punch ♪

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♪ When niggas got funk ♪

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Look, Timmy.

There's a convenience store.

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That must be

what the fellas meant

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by pop some punk-ass Bloods.

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They want us to get them

some soda pop and treats.

00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,800

Oh.

Timmy.

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Let's buy them ginger ale

and marshmallows.

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Then they'll let us

in the club for sure.

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Oh shit!

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S-S-S-S-Sunday driver!

00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:51,907

Yo, yo, listen up y'all.

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Let me tell you

about my little G's,

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Roller and Four Legs here.

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They just smoked 13 Bloods

in one night.

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That ain't never been done

before.

00:09:01,458 --> 00:09:04,461

And they got us marshmallows

and ginger ale.

00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:05,921

Uh-huh.

That's right.

00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:08,257

So does that mean we can join

the c-club?

00:09:08,382 --> 00:09:12,052

You're not just in, you're

the baddest mofo Crips in town.

00:09:12,177 --> 00:09:13,637

Cipac, turn up the beat

00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:16,056

so we can celebrate

our new G's Five Points style!

00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:17,849

A'ight.

00:09:19,518 --> 00:09:22,104

Wow.

These guys really a re crippled.

00:09:24,106 --> 00:09:26,483

Timmy, I have a feeling

this is the start

00:09:26,608 --> 00:09:29,403

of something w-w-w-w-wonderful.

00:09:29,528 --> 00:09:31,238

Timmy!

00:09:37,536 --> 00:09:38,787

Thanks for the ride home,

fellas.

00:09:38,912 --> 00:09:40,205

We sure had a terrific time.

00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:42,082

All right.

Keep it real, though, dog.

00:09:42,207 --> 00:09:43,667

You dogs keep it real, too.

00:09:43,792 --> 00:09:45,836

♪ 'Cause some got the funk

for the funk of it ♪

00:09:45,961 --> 00:09:47,045

♪ Just want to funk with it ♪

00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:49,131

♪ But I'm the wrong one

to funk with ♪

00:09:49,256 --> 00:09:50,299

Timmy!

00:09:51,967 --> 00:09:53,427

Well, that sure was

a terrific time.

00:09:53,552 --> 00:09:54,553

Let's go all around tomorrow

00:09:54,678 --> 00:09:56,054

and show everyone

our new outfits, Timmy.

00:09:56,179 --> 00:09:57,889

Timmy!

00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:00,100

There you are, Jimmy!

00:10:00,225 --> 00:10:01,560

What up, Mazie?

Y-Yo, Pops.

00:10:01,685 --> 00:10:03,395

Jimmy, your mother was getting

worried about you.

00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:04,479

No need to worry about me.

00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:07,899

I'm cool like a fool

in a swimming p-p-p-pool.

00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:11,528

Tom, I'm standing out front

00:10:11,653 --> 00:10:14,615

of the stem-cell research

facility with terrific news.

00:10:14,740 --> 00:10:16,783

Christopher Reeve,

who was once paralyzed,

00:10:16,908 --> 00:10:18,994

claims that he can now stand.

00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,370

Thank you, everyone.

00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:23,457

To most people, this is

just an ordinary fetus.

00:10:23,582 --> 00:10:25,917

But to people like me,

it's hope.

00:10:38,639 --> 00:10:41,141

Oh, my God!

- What an inspiration.

00:10:41,266 --> 00:10:43,226

Tom, many celebrities

have spoken out

00:10:43,352 --> 00:10:45,145

in protest

of stem-cell research,

00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:48,815

but after seeing this,

how can they protest now?

00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,862

Stay clear, guys.

Stay clear.

00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:56,323

Yep.

I'm not seeing anything.

00:11:00,952 --> 00:11:02,746

Hey.

00:11:02,871 --> 00:11:04,581

Hey, I no want no trouble!

00:11:04,706 --> 00:11:07,584

Hello. We'd like two orders

of kung p-pao chicken, please.

00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:08,835

I don't want no trouble!

00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:10,712

You just take what you want

and leave!

00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:11,463

Timmy!

00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:14,257

Oh! Okay, okay!

I opening register.

00:11:14,383 --> 00:11:15,467

Timmy.

- What's that?

00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:16,885

Oh, and one medium lemonade,

please.

00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:17,719

Timmy.

00:11:17,844 --> 00:11:22,015

Here! Here 112 dollar!

It's all I have! Take!

00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:23,433

Huh?

00:11:23,558 --> 00:11:25,435

You take!

112 dollar!

00:11:26,770 --> 00:11:28,105

A-Are you sure?

00:11:28,230 --> 00:11:30,524

I no want no trouble.

Just take it and leave!

00:11:30,649 --> 00:11:33,318

Well, gee, that's really nice

of you, Mr. Chinese person.

00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,070

Look, Tim-Tim.

We got a cash prize.

00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:37,155

We must be the 100th customer

or something.

00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:40,534

Here! Here two order of kung pao

chicken and small ice tea!

00:11:40,659 --> 00:11:42,452

Actually,

it was a regular lemonade.

00:11:42,577 --> 00:11:43,912

I sorry!

00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:45,997

I sorry!

I no want no trouble.

00:11:46,123 --> 00:11:47,666

Here.

Lemonade.

00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:49,000

Now go!

Just go!

00:11:49,126 --> 00:11:50,919

Gee, thanks a lot.

See you next time.

00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:52,421

Timmy!

00:11:55,507 --> 00:11:59,928

Hello, police? I've just been

robbed by two gang members!

00:12:01,263 --> 00:12:04,599

Jimmy? Jimmy, could you come

into the kitchen, please?

00:12:04,725 --> 00:12:07,060

Yo, Mamsie.

What's up, Pops?

00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:08,061

H-Have a seat, Jim.

00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:09,855

Your mother and I need

to talk to you.

00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,950

Son, your mother and I

00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,910

have noticed a change

in your behavior.

00:12:24,035 --> 00:12:27,539

And we're worried that you

might be involved in a gang.

00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:29,499

A what?

Oh, you mean the fellas.

00:12:29,624 --> 00:12:31,126

Well, sure,

but I can't talk about the club

00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:33,003

on account

of it's s-super secret, dog.

00:12:33,128 --> 00:12:35,630

Then it's true!

Oh, Ryan, it's true!

00:12:35,756 --> 00:12:37,758

Why you be tripping, Mom?

00:12:37,883 --> 00:12:40,427

I mean, come on. I'm finally

a part of something, very much.

00:12:40,552 --> 00:12:42,971

Jimmy, those people you're

hanging out with are no good.

00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:45,015

Yo, don't be dissing my niggas,

dog.

00:12:45,140 --> 00:12:46,933

They're my f-friends.

00:12:47,058 --> 00:12:49,144

And what about

your stand-up comedy, Jim, huh?

00:12:49,269 --> 00:12:50,937

Are you just giving up on that,

too?

00:12:51,062 --> 00:12:52,814

Nobody cared

about my stand-up comedy!

00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:54,399

All that hard work

just to be outshined

00:12:54,524 --> 00:12:56,860

by C-Christopher Reeve

the super butthole!

00:12:56,985 --> 00:12:58,528

Jimmy, we've told you before.

00:12:58,653 --> 00:13:00,489

God made you the way he did

for a reason.

00:13:00,614 --> 00:13:01,490

Right, because you and Mom

00:13:01,615 --> 00:13:03,408

used to make fun

of crippled kids in high school.

00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:04,910

That's right --

You were sent here

00:13:05,035 --> 00:13:06,661

through the vengeful

and angry hand of God

00:13:06,787 --> 00:13:08,288

to teach your mother and I

a lesson.

00:13:08,413 --> 00:13:09,998

And that's a big responsibility,

Son.

00:13:10,123 --> 00:13:11,208

Look, my gang,

00:13:11,333 --> 00:13:13,293

which I can't talk about

because it's super secret,

00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:14,753

is the most important thing

to me now.

00:13:14,878 --> 00:13:15,837

And if you two don't like it,

00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:18,548

you can just pass the blunt

to the nigga on your left.

00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:25,806

Where's that delivery

of new fetuses?

00:13:25,931 --> 00:13:27,516

Feeling weak again.

00:13:27,641 --> 00:13:29,267

Here's the new shipment, sir.

00:13:29,392 --> 00:13:31,353

Hey!

00:13:35,065 --> 00:13:37,400

Hello there, Christopher.

00:13:37,526 --> 00:13:40,278

Well, well, Gene Hackman,

my old nemesis from the movies.

00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:41,488

How are you?

00:13:41,613 --> 00:13:43,240

I'm good.

And you?

00:13:43,365 --> 00:13:46,910

I am better with each passing

day; stronger and more agile.

00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:52,457

Christopher, I've come to ask

you to stop what you're doing.

00:13:53,208 --> 00:13:54,501

What?

00:13:54,626 --> 00:13:57,170

Using stem cells

is like playing god.

00:13:57,295 --> 00:13:59,214

You should leave nature alone.

00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,383

And go back to the way I was?

00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:03,426

Is that what you're saying,

Hackman?

00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:05,095

I'm saying

that sometimes you need

00:14:05,220 --> 00:14:07,514

to just live with the cards

you're dealt, Christopher.

00:14:07,639 --> 00:14:08,765

Stop calling me Christopher!

00:14:08,890 --> 00:14:11,226

That name no longer has meaning

to me!

00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,144

Christopher was someone

who lived in a wheelchair,

00:14:13,270 --> 00:14:15,188

always being pushed around

by others!

00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:17,816

The old Christopher Reeve

is dead!

00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:20,944

From now on, I am...

00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,697

Chris!

00:14:23,822 --> 00:14:27,158

♪ 65 b-bottles of beer

on the wall ♪

00:14:27,284 --> 00:14:27,826

♪ 65... ♪

00:14:30,745 --> 00:14:33,707

Payback time, motherfucker!

00:14:33,832 --> 00:14:36,251

J-Jesus Christ!

00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:41,131

Holy g-guacamole!

00:14:43,884 --> 00:14:45,802

Freakin' frijoles!

00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:52,559

Leapin' l-langosta.

00:14:52,684 --> 00:14:54,477

East Side Bloods!

00:14:58,023 --> 00:14:59,482

We're Detectives Hyde

and Richardson,

00:14:59,608 --> 00:15:01,067

from the Special Gang Unit

in Denver.

00:15:01,192 --> 00:15:03,361

Any word on who shot up me

and Timmy's houses, officers?

00:15:03,486 --> 00:15:06,448

Word on the street is it was

a retaliation hit by the Bloods.

00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:08,033

The B-Bloods?

00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:10,243

You know, smart-mouth --

your rival gang.

00:15:10,368 --> 00:15:11,745

The Bloods are at war

with the Crips.

00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:13,163

They kill each other

all the time.

00:15:13,288 --> 00:15:14,205

T-They do?

00:15:14,331 --> 00:15:16,207

Don't act like you don't know,

you little punk!

00:15:16,333 --> 00:15:17,751

The Crips and Bloods

hate each other,

00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:20,086

and if you stay in that gang,

you're gonna end up dead, too.

00:15:20,211 --> 00:15:21,880

But -- But why do they

hate each other?

00:15:22,005 --> 00:15:25,717

Look, kid, I used to be a Crip

myself, but I'm not anymore.

00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:28,178

Oh, so you used s-stem cells

like Christopher Reeve?

00:15:28,303 --> 00:15:29,137

Come on.

00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:31,097

The only way these kids

are gonna get out of their gang

00:15:31,222 --> 00:15:32,390

is to get killed.

00:15:33,892 --> 00:15:35,101

Sarah!

00:15:35,226 --> 00:15:36,102

Oh, boy, Timmy.

00:15:36,227 --> 00:15:37,395

We should have never started

a gang

00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:38,355

for people crippled from birth.

00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:39,814

Now they're at war

with the people

00:15:39,940 --> 00:15:41,066

who were crippled

in an accident.

00:15:41,191 --> 00:15:43,777

Boy, were we wrong.

- Timmy.

00:15:43,902 --> 00:15:45,904

Wow. W-We've got to do

something, Timmy.

00:15:46,029 --> 00:15:48,239

We've got to get the Crips

and Bloods to s-stop fighting.

00:15:48,365 --> 00:15:50,033

I bet if we could just

get them together.

00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:51,326

But how?

00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:54,496

W-Wait a minute! I've got it!

A lock-in at the rec center!

00:15:54,621 --> 00:15:55,497

We did it for our church once.

00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:57,332

All we do is rent out

the rec center overnight.

00:15:57,457 --> 00:15:58,833

They lock the doors

so nobody can leave,

00:15:58,959 --> 00:15:59,709

and everyone has the whole night

00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:01,336

to play in the swimming pool

and laugh and talk.

00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:02,253

Timmy!

00:16:02,379 --> 00:16:03,254

You get all the Crips you can

00:16:03,380 --> 00:16:04,673

to the rec center

tomorrow night, Timmy.

00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:06,132

I'll try to get

all the B-Bloods there.

00:16:06,257 --> 00:16:09,094

- Timmy!

- This is gonna be t-terrific!

00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,722

Tom, several years ago,

actor Christopher Reeve

00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:14,808

had a horrible accident

and was paralyzed.

00:16:14,933 --> 00:16:15,934

The irony, of course,

00:16:16,059 --> 00:16:18,853

was that the man who played

Superman could no longer walk.

00:16:18,979 --> 00:16:20,188

America watched in wonder

00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:22,857

as he managed to move one

of his fingers, then his arms.

00:16:22,983 --> 00:16:25,235

And now,

seen for the first time on HBC,

00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:28,655

Christopher Reeve is going to

lift a truck up over his head.

00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:36,913

Oh, what a fighter.

- That brave, brave man.

00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:38,915

He's an inspiration to us all.

00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:41,251

Tom, the irony

is even more irony-y,

00:16:41,376 --> 00:16:43,128

as it appears

that the stem cells

00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,755

have given Christopher Reeve

almost superhuman strength.

00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,966

Chris, that's enough.

00:16:48,091 --> 00:16:50,468

Hello, Gene.

So good to see you.

00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:51,469

You're cured, Chris.

00:16:51,594 --> 00:16:53,471

It's time to stop using

stem cells.

00:16:53,596 --> 00:16:55,432

Stem-cell research

has made me stronger

00:16:55,557 --> 00:16:56,599

than I ever thought possible!

00:16:56,725 --> 00:16:57,600

Why stop now?

00:16:57,726 --> 00:16:59,352

Uh, Tom,

apparently Gene Hackman,

00:16:59,477 --> 00:17:01,813

the man who played Superman's

enemy Lex Luthor in the movies,

00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:05,233

has now shown up as a celebrity

protester of stem-cell research.

00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,777

If that isn't ironic, Tom,

I don't know what is.

00:17:07,902 --> 00:17:09,654

They're affecting your mind,

Chris.

00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:13,241

If you won't stop using

stem cells, then we'll stop you.

00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:16,327

Stop me?

Stop me? Ha!

00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:24,711

You won't stop me, Hack Man!

00:17:29,007 --> 00:17:31,468

Tom, if irony were made

of strawberries,

00:17:31,593 --> 00:17:34,554

we'd all be drinking

a lot of smoothies right now.

00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:38,308

Come on in, everybody.

00:17:38,433 --> 00:17:41,478

Lots of s-surprises

and t-treats inside.

00:17:41,603 --> 00:17:44,355

Great to see you all.

What a terrific audience.

00:17:44,481 --> 00:17:47,233

You sure you got everything

you need, young man?

00:17:47,358 --> 00:17:48,943

We sure do.

Thanks, Mr. Appleb--by.

00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:50,487

Just remember to make sure

00:17:50,612 --> 00:17:52,739

the kids play safe

in the pool area.

00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:53,573

You bet.

00:17:53,698 --> 00:17:55,325

I'll be back at 7:00

to let you out.

00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:57,077

You kids have a good time.

00:17:57,202 --> 00:17:58,161

Oh, we will.

00:18:04,793 --> 00:18:07,128

The Bloods!

- Oh shit! It's a trap!

00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:09,089

Motherfuckin' Crips

trying to smoke us all out!

00:18:09,214 --> 00:18:11,049

What the hell is going on here?

00:18:11,174 --> 00:18:12,759

It's called a lock-in

at the rec center.

00:18:12,884 --> 00:18:14,427

We can use

all the rec-center facilities.

00:18:14,552 --> 00:18:16,137

We can play b-basketball,

go swimming,

00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:17,472

or just kick it

in the lounge area

00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:19,099

with some games and p-puzzles.

00:18:19,224 --> 00:18:20,183

Timmy!

00:18:20,308 --> 00:18:21,893

But nobody can leave

until 7:00 a.m.,

00:18:22,018 --> 00:18:23,186

so if you want

to have a good time,

00:18:23,311 --> 00:18:24,938

you're all just gonna have

to learn to get along.

00:18:33,530 --> 00:18:36,533

There's pizza.

00:18:36,658 --> 00:18:37,909

Tom, over five years ago,

00:18:38,034 --> 00:18:39,536

doctors told

actor Christopher Reeve

00:18:39,661 --> 00:18:41,162

that he would never walk again.

00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:42,872

But the resilient actor

fought back,

00:18:42,997 --> 00:18:44,165

struggled against all odds,

00:18:44,290 --> 00:18:47,377

and has now built

his very own legion of doom!

00:18:47,502 --> 00:18:50,296

The once immobile Mr. Reeve

says his new organization

00:18:50,421 --> 00:18:52,757

will be committed

to world domination and evil.

00:18:52,882 --> 00:18:55,260

What an inspirational story,

Tom.

00:18:55,385 --> 00:18:57,137

I have chosen each member

00:18:57,262 --> 00:18:59,097

of this elite group

of supervillains

00:18:59,222 --> 00:19:02,934

for their outstanding treachery,

their desire for world conquest,

00:19:03,059 --> 00:19:05,395

and their hatred

of all things good!

00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:08,273

And I've assembled this group

for one purpose --

00:19:08,398 --> 00:19:11,901

to once and for all find

a way to...

00:19:12,026 --> 00:19:14,070

get rid of Hack Man!

00:19:17,031 --> 00:19:20,243

Uh, how about domination

of the world?

00:19:20,368 --> 00:19:22,871

Yeah, or, uh,

death to the infidels?

00:19:22,996 --> 00:19:23,955

Silence!

00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:25,540

Our job is to see to it

00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:27,750

that Hack Man is put

out of commission.

00:19:27,876 --> 00:19:29,210

Oh, boy, General Disarray.

00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:31,546

Maybe we just ought to stay out

of this one.

00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,965

Not so fast, Chris!

00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:35,258

Hack Man!

00:19:35,383 --> 00:19:37,886

We just helped pass a ban

on stem-cell research.

00:19:38,011 --> 00:19:40,430

Your fetus-sucking days

are over.

00:19:40,555 --> 00:19:42,390

No.

No!

00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:44,058

And now we're going to put you

somewhere

00:19:44,184 --> 00:19:47,103

where you can never touch

another fetus again.

00:19:47,979 --> 00:19:50,773

You stupid mofos are dead!

- Make the first shot, punk!

00:19:50,899 --> 00:19:53,151

Hold it!

Don't you see?

00:19:53,276 --> 00:19:55,236

It doesn't matter

if we were crippled from birth

00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:56,654

or crippled in an accident.

00:19:56,779 --> 00:19:58,156

We're all brothers.

00:19:58,281 --> 00:20:00,575

Save it, fool!

Crips ain't our brothers!

00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,535

Look, we have the whole

rec center to ourselves.

00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:04,454

Can't we all just try

having some fun together?

00:20:04,579 --> 00:20:05,914

You talking crazy, dog.

00:20:06,039 --> 00:20:07,707

Yeah.

We ain't playing, sucker!

00:20:07,832 --> 00:20:09,083

Why don't we at least give it

a chance?

00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:11,002

I mean, come on.

00:20:12,503 --> 00:20:15,340

Wait a minute.

What did you say?

00:20:15,465 --> 00:20:17,634

I said, "I mean, come on."

00:20:19,177 --> 00:20:21,387

You know, maybe he's right.

00:20:21,512 --> 00:20:23,348

I mean, come on.

00:20:23,932 --> 00:20:24,974

Come on.

00:20:25,099 --> 00:20:28,394

I guess we could at least give

having fun together a try.

00:20:28,519 --> 00:20:29,729

It's like, come on.

00:20:29,854 --> 00:20:31,314

Yeah.

Come on.

00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:32,565

Yeah, that's right.

Come on.

00:20:32,690 --> 00:20:33,900

Come on.

- Come on.

00:20:34,025 --> 00:20:35,818

Yeah, come on.

- That's right. Come on.

00:20:35,944 --> 00:20:38,863

♪ P's and Q's are important

to avoid a squabble ♪

00:20:38,988 --> 00:20:41,491

♪ They break you off something,

break them something harder ♪

00:20:41,616 --> 00:20:44,702

♪ Make sure they ass understand

how you coming from, respect ♪

00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:46,120

Got to give you two dogs props

00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:47,956

for putting an end

to all this hate.

00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:49,999

I told you -- Lock-in

at the rec center always works.

00:20:50,124 --> 00:20:51,834

And, you know,

I've learned something, too.

00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:53,836

I was player-hating

C-Christopher butthole Reeve

00:20:53,962 --> 00:20:55,505

because he got more attention

than me.

00:20:55,630 --> 00:20:56,673

But just like y-you guys,

00:20:56,798 --> 00:20:59,259

I need to learn to control

my a-anger.

00:20:59,384 --> 00:21:00,385

Right on!

00:21:00,510 --> 00:21:03,054

Hey, little Roller,

try some of this chronic shit.

00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:04,264

Timmy!

00:21:05,682 --> 00:21:08,101

Well, I guess we all learned

that trying to get along

00:21:08,226 --> 00:21:10,186

is way better

than p-p-player hating.

00:21:10,311 --> 00:21:12,522

The gang wrote a song about it.

Why don't we listen in?

00:21:12,647 --> 00:21:15,191

♪ Used to be Crips and Bloods

didn't get along ♪

00:21:15,316 --> 00:21:17,735

♪ But now we're all a family,

so we wrote this song ♪

00:21:17,860 --> 00:21:20,154

♪ Na na na, Crips and Bloods ♪

00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:22,323

♪ Na na na, hope and love ♪

00:21:22,448 --> 00:21:24,867

♪ Na na na, friendly thugs ♪

00:21:25,743 --> 00:21:28,788

You haven't seen

the last of me, Hack Man!

00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:33,376

I will be ba-a-a-ck!

00:21:33,501 --> 00:21:35,670

Dude, I am so glad

we stayed out of that one.

00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:36,921

Me too.

00:00:12,054 --> 00:00:13,806

♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪

00:00:13,931 --> 00:00:15,599

♪ Humble folks

without temptation ♪

00:00:15,725 --> 00:00:18,602

♪ Goin' down to South Park,

gonna leave my woes behind ♪

00:00:18,728 --> 00:00:20,604

♪ Ample parking day or night ♪

00:00:20,730 --> 00:00:22,023

♪ People spouting,

"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪

00:00:22,148 --> 00:00:25,401

♪ Heading on up to South Park,

gonna see if I can't unwind ♪

00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:28,529

Mrph rmhmhm rm!

Mrph rmhmhm rm!

00:00:28,654 --> 00:00:33,159

♪ Come on down to South Park

and meet some friends of mine ♪

00:00:34,493 --> 00:00:36,328

[Drumroll,

up-tempo music plays]

00:00:36,454 --> 00:00:39,999

[Announcer]

Ladies and gentlemen,

give it up for Jimmy!

00:00:40,124 --> 00:00:42,501

Thank you! Wow.

What a terrific audience.

00:00:42,626 --> 00:00:43,794

I know what most of you

are thinking.

00:00:43,919 --> 00:00:47,381

"Hey, that guy stole my shoes."

00:00:47,506 --> 00:00:49,341

Wow. What a great audience.

00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:51,385

And how about this

Michael Jackson guy, huh?

00:00:51,510 --> 00:00:53,596

I mean, come on.

00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:55,139

Wow.

What a great audience.

00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:56,307

[Hands clapping]

00:00:56,432 --> 00:00:58,267

Uh...l-lights, please?

00:01:00,770 --> 00:01:02,605

Hey, Jimmy.

00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:04,607

Butters, w-where is everybody?

00:01:04,732 --> 00:01:06,734

Oh, yeah.

Well, about that.

00:01:06,859 --> 00:01:09,528

Christopher Reeve came to town

to do some kind of show,

00:01:09,653 --> 00:01:10,988

and everyone went to see him.

00:01:11,113 --> 00:01:13,574

Christopher Reeve?

Christopher Reeve?!

00:01:13,699 --> 00:01:15,451

You know, Christopher Reeve,

the guy who played Superman.

00:01:15,576 --> 00:01:16,535

I know who he is!

00:01:16,660 --> 00:01:18,996

But why is everyone ditching

my comedy show to see him?!

00:01:19,121 --> 00:01:22,083

W-Well, because he got crippled,

but now he can move his finger.

00:01:22,208 --> 00:01:23,793

He is an inspiration to us all.

00:01:23,918 --> 00:01:26,170

That's why everyone ditched

on your show.

00:01:26,295 --> 00:01:27,922

So then how come you came?

00:01:28,047 --> 00:01:31,050

Well, because I said I would.

00:01:31,175 --> 00:01:33,594

Oh, I'm a dork, huh?

00:01:34,970 --> 00:01:36,472

And so without further ado,

00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:39,475

here's the most courageous,

most amazing man on the planet,

00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:40,976

Christopher Reeve.

00:01:41,102 --> 00:01:42,978

[Cheers and applause]

00:01:43,104 --> 00:01:45,147

[Down-tempo music plays]

00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:48,609

Thank you. Thank you.

Wow. What a great audience.

00:01:48,734 --> 00:01:50,194

[Birds chirping]

00:01:50,319 --> 00:01:52,905

I just flew into South Park.

00:01:53,739 --> 00:01:56,075

Used to be

I didn't need an airplane.

00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:58,327

[Laughter]

00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:01,664

As most of you know...

00:02:01,789 --> 00:02:04,917

I am a strong supporter

of stem-cell research.

00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:08,087

Say, fellas! Thanks a lot

for going to my c-comedy show!

00:02:08,212 --> 00:02:09,630

We didn't go

to your comedy show.

00:02:09,755 --> 00:02:12,842

I know that!

I was being f-f-f-facetious!

00:02:12,967 --> 00:02:14,927

Well, dude.

Christopher Reeve, dude.

00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:17,138

Ooh! Christopher Reeve!

Whoop-de-freakin'-do!

00:02:17,263 --> 00:02:18,222

Dude, that's not cool.

00:02:18,347 --> 00:02:19,598

You shouldn't make fun

of Christopher Reeve.

00:02:19,723 --> 00:02:20,683

Yeah, dude, not cool.

00:02:20,808 --> 00:02:22,726

Though it is controversial...

00:02:22,852 --> 00:02:24,103

[Birds chirping]

00:02:24,228 --> 00:02:26,981

...stem-cell research

is critical...

00:02:28,190 --> 00:02:30,776

...in the quest for helping...

00:02:32,736 --> 00:02:33,696

...the disabled.

00:02:33,821 --> 00:02:36,574

I put together a comedy show,

and I was crippled from birth!

00:02:38,033 --> 00:02:40,286

Uh, whoo. Guys, I think we'd

better stay out of this one.

00:02:40,411 --> 00:02:41,328

Yeah, this is starting to look

00:02:41,453 --> 00:02:42,872

like something we shouldn't be

any part of.

00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:44,331

Let's go play with trucks

or something.

00:02:44,456 --> 00:02:46,542

Can you believe this ass wipe,

Timmy?

00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:47,543

Timmy!

00:02:47,668 --> 00:02:49,336

Why is a celebrity

who became crippled

00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:51,922

more important than us that were

born that way, very much?

00:02:52,047 --> 00:02:53,799

Ugh, Timmy!

00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:56,010

In the coming days...

00:02:56,135 --> 00:02:58,512

I will prove to the world...

00:02:58,637 --> 00:03:01,807

that stem-cell research

is a miracle.

00:03:01,932 --> 00:03:03,893

[Imitating engines revving]

00:03:04,018 --> 00:03:06,395

Beep, beep, beep.

Move it, Kenny! Beep.

00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,355

Hey, there, fellas.

- Oh, hey, Jimmy, hey, Timmy.

00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:09,440

Timmy!

00:03:09,565 --> 00:03:11,066

Say, would you guys like

to join our club?

00:03:11,192 --> 00:03:12,276

Oh, I'm sorry.

You can't.

00:03:12,401 --> 00:03:14,528

You aren't crippled.

[Laughs]

00:03:14,653 --> 00:03:15,779

What?

00:03:15,905 --> 00:03:18,199

To be in our club, not only

do you have to be c-crippled,

00:03:18,324 --> 00:03:19,867

but you have to have been born

that way.

00:03:19,992 --> 00:03:20,868

You know what that means?

00:03:20,993 --> 00:03:23,287

No butthole Superman ass wipe

Christopher Reeve.

00:03:23,412 --> 00:03:26,165

That's nice, guys. We're just

gonna stay out of this one.

00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,125

Hey, wait a minute!

00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:30,294

You guys can't just start a club

and tell me I can't be in it!

00:03:30,419 --> 00:03:32,046

Sorry, able-body.

You can't join.

00:03:32,171 --> 00:03:33,214

Can too!

00:03:33,339 --> 00:03:35,132

Hey, Timmy, how many able-bodied

people does it take

00:03:35,257 --> 00:03:36,300

to screw in a light bulb?

00:03:36,425 --> 00:03:37,509

One.

00:03:37,635 --> 00:03:39,220

[Laughter]

00:03:39,345 --> 00:03:42,181

You know what you call an

able-bodied guy on the doorstep?

00:03:42,306 --> 00:03:43,390

Whatever his name is.

00:03:43,515 --> 00:03:45,559

[Laughter]

00:03:45,684 --> 00:03:47,019

Oh, God damn it!

00:03:47,144 --> 00:03:48,062

Cartman, just stay out of it.

00:03:48,187 --> 00:03:49,563

But they say I can't be

in their club!

00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:51,523

Cartman, trust me. We don't want

any part in this one.

00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:56,987

Hello, Mr. McGillic--

Mr. McGillicuddy.

00:03:57,112 --> 00:03:58,906

Hello, boys.

What can I do for you?

00:03:59,031 --> 00:04:01,242

Timmy and I made a T-shirt

design for our new club.

00:04:01,367 --> 00:04:03,619

We just came up with a name

this morning.

00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:10,000

Uh, boys, I don't think

you want to wear these shirts.

00:04:10,125 --> 00:04:11,085

Why not?

00:04:11,210 --> 00:04:13,504

Well, because there

already is a group

00:04:13,629 --> 00:04:14,880

that calls themselves The Crips,

00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:16,799

and I don't think

they'd like it too much.

00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:19,468

There's already a Crips?!

00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:22,096

Well, sure, they're all over

Five Points area in Denver.

00:04:22,221 --> 00:04:23,305

You've never heard of them?

00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:24,473

No, we never have.

00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:25,516

Are they crippled from birth,

00:04:25,641 --> 00:04:28,102

or are they cripple wannabes

like Christopher Reeve?

00:04:29,186 --> 00:04:31,647

Ooh.

I am staying out of this one.

00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:33,649

Can you believe it, Timmy?

00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:36,110

There was a group for truly

crippled people like ourselves,

00:04:36,235 --> 00:04:37,111

and we didn't know it.

00:04:37,236 --> 00:04:38,195

Timmy!

00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:41,490

Come on. We got to take the bus

to Five Points in Denver.

00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:43,450

My guest tonight

is the brilliant star

00:04:43,575 --> 00:04:45,369

of stage and screen,

Mr. Christopher Reeve,

00:04:45,494 --> 00:04:47,371

who, with the help

of stem-cell research,

00:04:47,496 --> 00:04:49,164

is now able to move his arms.

00:04:49,290 --> 00:04:50,833

Thanks for having me on again,

Larry.

00:04:50,958 --> 00:04:52,501

All right, Chris.

The whole world is waiting.

00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:55,170

Why don't you show us what stem-

cell research has done for you?

00:04:56,964 --> 00:04:59,049

[Grunts]

00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:00,759

Amazing.

Isn't that amazing, folks?

00:05:00,884 --> 00:05:02,303

Now, Chris,

there are some people

00:05:02,428 --> 00:05:03,929

who say stem-cell research

is wrong,

00:05:04,054 --> 00:05:06,932

that taking cells from a fetus

is unethical.

00:05:07,057 --> 00:05:08,434

Well, it just proves

that the public

00:05:08,559 --> 00:05:10,477

needs to be educated...

00:05:11,770 --> 00:05:13,439

...about stem-cell research.

00:05:13,564 --> 00:05:16,442

See, the stem cells

from a fetus, like this one,

00:05:16,567 --> 00:05:19,153

can form into whatever cells

of the body are damaged.

00:05:19,278 --> 00:05:21,572

They are the most powerful thing

on the planet.

00:05:21,697 --> 00:05:23,073

And how does someone

like yourself

00:05:23,198 --> 00:05:24,616

make use of the stem cells,

Chris?

00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:26,952

Well, it's very simple.

00:05:29,246 --> 00:05:30,873

[Slurping]

00:05:38,130 --> 00:05:41,967

And now you can see

my arms have better movement.

00:05:42,092 --> 00:05:44,553

Wow. Wow.

00:05:44,678 --> 00:05:46,638

[Horn honks, gunshots]

00:05:46,764 --> 00:05:49,141

[Woman screaming,

siren wailing]

00:05:51,393 --> 00:05:52,686

Excuse me, sir.

00:05:52,811 --> 00:05:55,147

We're looking for a group

of people called the Crips.

00:05:55,272 --> 00:05:56,940

You are?

00:05:57,066 --> 00:05:58,525

Do you know where they meet?

00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:01,111

We've already tried

the rec center and the library.

00:06:01,236 --> 00:06:04,073

The Crips hang out in that

old warehouse down there,

00:06:04,198 --> 00:06:06,367

but nobody goes in there.

00:06:06,492 --> 00:06:08,118

Oh, it's okay.

We're Crips ourselves.

00:06:08,243 --> 00:06:10,662

Come on, Tim-Tim.

- Timmy!

00:06:10,788 --> 00:06:13,165

[Down-tempo hip-hop playing]

00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:20,214

Well, hello, everyone.

00:06:20,339 --> 00:06:21,965

[Needle scratches,

music stops]

00:06:22,091 --> 00:06:24,259

I'm Jim Swanson,

and this is my friend Timmy.

00:06:24,385 --> 00:06:25,344

Timmy!

00:06:27,513 --> 00:06:29,890

T-T-Timmy.

00:06:30,015 --> 00:06:32,267

Well, let us tell you

a little bit about ourselves.

00:06:32,393 --> 00:06:34,436

Timmy and I are both true Crips,

born and raised.

00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:36,522

We're the only Crips

in South Park, where we live,

00:06:36,647 --> 00:06:40,734

and we would love to join your

fa-fa-fantastic Denver chapter.

00:06:42,528 --> 00:06:44,405

Is they for real, man?

00:06:44,530 --> 00:06:46,949

We just have one question

before we join your c-club.

00:06:47,074 --> 00:06:48,909

Do you think it's better

to be born a Crip

00:06:49,034 --> 00:06:50,953

or to become a Crip later

by accident?

00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:53,997

The only real Crips

is born Crips, dog.

00:06:54,123 --> 00:06:57,292

Yeah, you can't become a Crip

by accident, fool.

00:06:57,418 --> 00:06:59,461

I agree.

I mean, it's like, come on!

00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:01,672

Why do these people

who become Crips later in life

00:07:01,797 --> 00:07:03,632

think they're

such great p-potatoes?

00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:04,675

Timmy!

00:07:05,968 --> 00:07:07,761

Well, we're glad you see it

our way, fellas.

00:07:07,886 --> 00:07:09,930

So, can we join your g-group?

00:07:10,055 --> 00:07:12,391

A'ight, you want to thug

with the Five Point Crips?

00:07:12,516 --> 00:07:15,102

Bitches, all you got to do

is pop some punk-ass Bloods.

00:07:15,727 --> 00:07:16,478

Well, sure.

00:07:16,603 --> 00:07:18,480

Tim and I would love to pop

some p-punk-ass Bloods.

00:07:18,605 --> 00:07:19,690

We're terrific at it.

00:07:19,815 --> 00:07:20,774

Timmy?

00:07:20,899 --> 00:07:22,818

I don't know, Timmy.

Just play along.

00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:24,319

Uh, T-Timmy!

00:07:24,445 --> 00:07:25,821

So you saying you're down?

00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:28,240

Down like a clown,

Charlie Br--

00:07:28,365 --> 00:07:30,742

Down like a clown,

Charlie B-Brow...

00:07:30,868 --> 00:07:34,413

Down like a clown,

Charlie Bah...Bah...

00:07:34,538 --> 00:07:35,998

Down like a clown,

Charlie B-Brown.

00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:37,124

[Mid-tempo hip-hop plays]

00:07:37,249 --> 00:07:39,626

♪ Kickin' it with a nigga while

I have his wife for dinner ♪

00:07:39,751 --> 00:07:42,045

♪ Now the silly nigga

wants to fly ♪

00:07:42,171 --> 00:07:43,297

♪ Buster ♪

♪ But fightin' is for chumps ♪

00:07:43,422 --> 00:07:44,631

♪ Didn't you know? ♪

00:07:44,756 --> 00:07:48,260

♪ In the 9 Joe,

it's all about the 4-4 ♪

00:07:48,385 --> 00:07:50,345

♪ And can't stop it

when bad apples in the bunch ♪

00:07:50,471 --> 00:07:51,680

Say, Timmy, did you notice

00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,724

that all the crippled people

in that club are negroes?

00:07:53,849 --> 00:07:54,683

Timmy!

00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:56,018

That's an amazing coincidence.

00:07:56,143 --> 00:07:58,770

I mean, there's not one crippled

colored person in South P-Park.

00:07:58,896 --> 00:08:01,023

[Police radio chatter]

00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:03,108

Hey, you kids.

00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:05,360

Well, hello, officers.

00:08:05,486 --> 00:08:07,738

What the hell do you think

you're doing?

00:08:07,863 --> 00:08:10,616

We're going to pop

some punk-ass B-Bloods.

00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:12,284

Timmy!

00:08:17,164 --> 00:08:18,957

♪ Stop it, dog,

with just one punch ♪

00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:19,958

♪ When niggas got funk ♪

00:08:20,083 --> 00:08:22,044

Look, Timmy.

There's a convenience store.

00:08:22,169 --> 00:08:23,420

That must be

what the fellas meant

00:08:23,545 --> 00:08:24,713

by pop some punk-ass Bloods.

00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:26,715

They want us to get them

some soda pop and treats.

00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,800

Oh.

Timmy.

00:08:28,926 --> 00:08:31,428

[Indistinct conversations]

00:08:31,553 --> 00:08:33,222

Let's buy them ginger ale

and marshmallows.

00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:35,224

Then they'll let us

in the club for sure.

00:08:37,059 --> 00:08:39,019

Oh shit!

[Tires screech]

00:08:39,144 --> 00:08:41,688

[Crowd screaming]

00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:47,903

S-S-S-S-Sunday driver!

00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,322

[ Indistinct conversations ]

00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:51,907

Yo, yo, listen up y'all.

00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:53,492

Let me tell you

about my little G's,

00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:54,618

Roller and Four Legs here.

00:08:54,743 --> 00:08:57,246

They just smoked 13 Bloods

in one night.

00:08:57,371 --> 00:08:59,289

[Crowd murmuring]

00:08:59,414 --> 00:09:01,333

That ain't never been done

before.

00:09:01,458 --> 00:09:04,461

And they got us marshmallows

and ginger ale.

00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:05,921

Uh-huh.

That's right.

00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:08,257

So does that mean we can join

the c-club?

00:09:08,382 --> 00:09:12,052

You're not just in, you're

the baddest mofo Crips in town.

00:09:12,177 --> 00:09:13,637

Cipac, turn up the beat

00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:16,056

so we can celebrate

our new G's Five Points style!

00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:17,849

A'ight.

00:09:19,518 --> 00:09:22,104

Wow.

These guys really a re crippled.

00:09:22,229 --> 00:09:23,981

[Hip-hop music plays,

indistinct conversations]

00:09:24,106 --> 00:09:26,483

Timmy, I have a feeling

this is the start

00:09:26,608 --> 00:09:29,403

of something w-w-w-w-wonderful.

00:09:29,528 --> 00:09:31,238

Timmy!

00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:35,867

[Mid-tempo hip-hop playing]

00:09:37,536 --> 00:09:38,787

Thanks for the ride home,

fellas.

00:09:38,912 --> 00:09:40,205

We sure had a terrific time.

00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:42,082

All right.

Keep it real, though, dog.

00:09:42,207 --> 00:09:43,667

You dogs keep it real, too.

00:09:43,792 --> 00:09:45,836

♪ 'Cause some got the funk

for the funk of it ♪

00:09:45,961 --> 00:09:47,045

♪ Just want to funk with it ♪

00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:49,131

♪ But I'm the wrong one

to funk with ♪

00:09:49,256 --> 00:09:50,299

Timmy!

00:09:51,967 --> 00:09:53,427

Well, that sure was

a terrific time.

00:09:53,552 --> 00:09:54,553

Let's go all around tomorrow

00:09:54,678 --> 00:09:56,054

and show everyone

our new outfits, Timmy.

00:09:56,179 --> 00:09:57,889

Timmy!

00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:00,100

There you are, Jimmy!

00:10:00,225 --> 00:10:01,560

What up, Mazie?

Y-Yo, Pops.

00:10:01,685 --> 00:10:03,395

Jimmy, your mother was getting

worried about you.

00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:04,479

No need to worry about me.

00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:07,899

I'm cool like a fool

in a swimming p-p-p-pool.

00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:11,528

Tom, I'm standing out front

00:10:11,653 --> 00:10:14,615

of the stem-cell research

facility with terrific news.

00:10:14,740 --> 00:10:16,783

Christopher Reeve,

who was once paralyzed,

00:10:16,908 --> 00:10:18,994

claims that he can now stand.

00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,370

Thank you, everyone.

00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:23,457

To most people, this is

just an ordinary fetus.

00:10:23,582 --> 00:10:25,917

But to people like me,

it's hope.

00:10:27,085 --> 00:10:29,504

[Slurping]

00:10:29,630 --> 00:10:32,633

[Crowd murmurs]

00:10:32,758 --> 00:10:35,927

[Drumroll,

triumphant music plays]

00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:38,513

[Crowd cheering]

00:10:38,639 --> 00:10:41,141

Oh, my God!

- What an inspiration.

00:10:41,266 --> 00:10:43,226

Tom, many celebrities

have spoken out

00:10:43,352 --> 00:10:45,145

in protest

of stem-cell research,

00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:48,815

but after seeing this,

how can they protest now?

00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:51,735

[Slurping]

00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,862

Stay clear, guys.

Stay clear.

00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:56,323

Yep.

I'm not seeing anything.

00:11:00,952 --> 00:11:02,746

Hey.

00:11:02,871 --> 00:11:04,581

Hey, I no want no trouble!

00:11:04,706 --> 00:11:07,584

Hello. We'd like two orders

of kung p-pao chicken, please.

00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:08,835

I don't want no trouble!

00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:10,712

You just take what you want

and leave!

00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:11,463

Timmy!

00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:14,257

Oh! Okay, okay!

I opening register.

00:11:14,383 --> 00:11:15,467

Timmy.

- What's that?

00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:16,885

Oh, and one medium lemonade,

please.

00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:17,719

Timmy.

00:11:17,844 --> 00:11:22,015

Here! Here 112 dollar!

It's all I have! Take!

00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:23,433

Huh?

00:11:23,558 --> 00:11:25,435

You take!

112 dollar!

00:11:26,770 --> 00:11:28,105

A-Are you sure?

00:11:28,230 --> 00:11:30,524

I no want no trouble.

Just take it and leave!

00:11:30,649 --> 00:11:33,318

Well, gee, that's really nice

of you, Mr. Chinese person.

00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,070

Look, Tim-Tim.

We got a cash prize.

00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:37,155

We must be the 100th customer

or something.

00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:40,534

Here! Here two order of kung pao

chicken and small ice tea!

00:11:40,659 --> 00:11:42,452

Actually,

it was a regular lemonade.

00:11:42,577 --> 00:11:43,912

[Screams]

I sorry!

00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:45,997

I sorry!

I no want no trouble.

00:11:46,123 --> 00:11:47,666

Here.

Lemonade.

00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:49,000

Now go!

Just go!

00:11:49,126 --> 00:11:50,919

Gee, thanks a lot.

See you next time.

00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:52,421

Timmy!

00:11:52,546 --> 00:11:54,214

[Bell jingles]

00:11:54,339 --> 00:11:55,382

[Telephone dialing]

00:11:55,507 --> 00:11:59,928

Hello, police? I've just been

robbed by two gang members!

00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:01,138

[Door opens, closes]

00:12:01,263 --> 00:12:04,599

Jimmy? Jimmy, could you come

into the kitchen, please?

00:12:04,725 --> 00:12:07,060

Yo, Mamsie.

What's up, Pops?

00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:08,061

H-Have a seat, Jim.

00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:09,855

Your mother and I need

to talk to you.

00:12:11,356 --> 00:12:13,400

[Grunting]

00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:16,194

[Slurps]

00:12:16,862 --> 00:12:20,115

[Breathing heavily]

00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,950

Son, your mother and I

00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,910

have noticed a change

in your behavior.

00:12:24,035 --> 00:12:27,539

And we're worried that you

might be involved in a gang.

00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:29,499

A what?

Oh, you mean the fellas.

00:12:29,624 --> 00:12:31,126

Well, sure,

but I can't talk about the club

00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:33,003

on account

of it's s-super secret, dog.

00:12:33,128 --> 00:12:35,630

Then it's true!

Oh, Ryan, it's true!

00:12:35,756 --> 00:12:37,758

[Sobs]

Why you be tripping, Mom?

00:12:37,883 --> 00:12:40,427

I mean, come on. I'm finally

a part of something, very much.

00:12:40,552 --> 00:12:42,971

Jimmy, those people you're

hanging out with are no good.

00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:45,015

Yo, don't be dissing my niggas,

dog.

00:12:45,140 --> 00:12:46,933

They're my f-friends.

00:12:47,058 --> 00:12:49,144

And what about

your stand-up comedy, Jim, huh?

00:12:49,269 --> 00:12:50,937

Are you just giving up on that,

too?

00:12:51,062 --> 00:12:52,814

Nobody cared

about my stand-up comedy!

00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:54,399

All that hard work

just to be outshined

00:12:54,524 --> 00:12:56,860

by C-Christopher Reeve

the super butthole!

00:12:56,985 --> 00:12:58,528

Jimmy, we've told you before.

00:12:58,653 --> 00:13:00,489

God made you the way he did

for a reason.

00:13:00,614 --> 00:13:01,490

Right, because you and Mom

00:13:01,615 --> 00:13:03,408

used to make fun

of crippled kids in high school.

00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:04,910

That's right --

You were sent here

00:13:05,035 --> 00:13:06,661

through the vengeful

and angry hand of God

00:13:06,787 --> 00:13:08,288

to teach your mother and I

a lesson.

00:13:08,413 --> 00:13:09,998

And that's a big responsibility,

Son.

00:13:10,123 --> 00:13:11,208

Look, my gang,

00:13:11,333 --> 00:13:13,293

which I can't talk about

because it's super secret,

00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:14,753

is the most important thing

to me now.

00:13:14,878 --> 00:13:15,837

And if you two don't like it,

00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:18,548

you can just pass the blunt

to the nigga on your left.

00:13:20,258 --> 00:13:23,094

[Sobbing]

00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:25,806

Where's that delivery

of new fetuses?

00:13:25,931 --> 00:13:27,516

Feeling weak again.

00:13:27,641 --> 00:13:29,267

Here's the new shipment, sir.

00:13:29,392 --> 00:13:31,353

Hey!

[ Grunting ]

00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:33,730

[ Slurping ]

00:13:35,065 --> 00:13:37,400

Hello there, Christopher.

00:13:37,526 --> 00:13:40,278

Well, well, Gene Hackman,

my old nemesis from the movies.

00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:41,488

How are you?

00:13:41,613 --> 00:13:43,240

I'm good.

And you?

00:13:43,365 --> 00:13:46,910

I am better with each passing

day; stronger and more agile.

00:13:47,035 --> 00:13:48,537

[Slurping]

00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:52,457

Christopher, I've come to ask

you to stop what you're doing.

00:13:53,208 --> 00:13:54,501

What?

00:13:54,626 --> 00:13:57,170

Using stem cells

is like playing god.

00:13:57,295 --> 00:13:59,214

You should leave nature alone.

00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,383

And go back to the way I was?

00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:03,426

Is that what you're saying,

Hackman?

00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:05,095

I'm saying

that sometimes you need

00:14:05,220 --> 00:14:07,514

to just live with the cards

you're dealt, Christopher.

00:14:07,639 --> 00:14:08,765

Stop calling me Christopher!

00:14:08,890 --> 00:14:11,226

That name no longer has meaning

to me!

00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,144

Christopher was someone

who lived in a wheelchair,

00:14:13,270 --> 00:14:15,188

always being pushed around

by others!

00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:17,816

The old Christopher Reeve

is dead!

00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:20,944

From now on, I am...

00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,697

Chris!

00:14:23,822 --> 00:14:27,158

♪ 65 b-bottles of beer

on the wall ♪

00:14:27,284 --> 00:14:27,826

♪ 65... ♪

00:14:27,951 --> 00:14:30,620

[Mid-tempo hip-hop playing]

00:14:30,745 --> 00:14:33,707

Payback time, motherfucker!

00:14:33,832 --> 00:14:36,251

J-Jesus Christ!

[Gunfire, glass shattering]

00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:41,131

Holy g-guacamole!

00:14:43,884 --> 00:14:45,802

Freakin' frijoles!

00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:52,559

Leapin' l-langosta.

[Glass breaks]

00:14:52,684 --> 00:14:54,477

East Side Bloods!

00:14:54,603 --> 00:14:55,854

[Tires screech]

00:14:55,979 --> 00:14:57,898

[Down-tempo music plays]

00:14:58,023 --> 00:14:59,482

We're Detectives Hyde

and Richardson,

00:14:59,608 --> 00:15:01,067

from the Special Gang Unit

in Denver.

00:15:01,192 --> 00:15:03,361

Any word on who shot up me

and Timmy's houses, officers?

00:15:03,486 --> 00:15:06,448

Word on the street is it was

a retaliation hit by the Bloods.

00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:08,033

The B-Bloods?

00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:10,243

You know, smart-mouth --

your rival gang.

00:15:10,368 --> 00:15:11,745

The Bloods are at war

with the Crips.

00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:13,163

They kill each other

all the time.

00:15:13,288 --> 00:15:14,205

T-They do?

00:15:14,331 --> 00:15:16,207

Don't act like you don't know,

you little punk!

00:15:16,333 --> 00:15:17,751

The Crips and Bloods

hate each other,

00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:20,086

and if you stay in that gang,

you're gonna end up dead, too.

00:15:20,211 --> 00:15:21,880

But -- But why do they

hate each other?

00:15:22,005 --> 00:15:25,717

Look, kid, I used to be a Crip

myself, but I'm not anymore.

00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:28,178

Oh, so you used s-stem cells

like Christopher Reeve?

00:15:28,303 --> 00:15:29,137

Come on.

00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:31,097

The only way these kids

are gonna get out of their gang

00:15:31,222 --> 00:15:32,390

is to get killed.

00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:33,767

[Sobbing]

00:15:33,892 --> 00:15:35,101

Sarah!

00:15:35,226 --> 00:15:36,102

Oh, boy, Timmy.

00:15:36,227 --> 00:15:37,395

We should have never started

a gang

00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:38,355

for people crippled from birth.

00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:39,814

Now they're at war

with the people

00:15:39,940 --> 00:15:41,066

who were crippled

in an accident.

00:15:41,191 --> 00:15:43,777

Boy, were we wrong.

- Timmy.

00:15:43,902 --> 00:15:45,904

Wow. W-We've got to do

something, Timmy.

00:15:46,029 --> 00:15:48,239

We've got to get the Crips

and Bloods to s-stop fighting.

00:15:48,365 --> 00:15:50,033

I bet if we could just

get them together.

00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:51,326

But how?

00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:54,496

W-Wait a minute! I've got it!

A lock-in at the rec center!

00:15:54,621 --> 00:15:55,497

We did it for our church once.

00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:57,332

All we do is rent out

the rec center overnight.

00:15:57,457 --> 00:15:58,833

They lock the doors

so nobody can leave,

00:15:58,959 --> 00:15:59,709

and everyone has the whole night

00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:01,336

to play in the swimming pool

and laugh and talk.

00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:02,253

Timmy!

00:16:02,379 --> 00:16:03,254

You get all the Crips you can

00:16:03,380 --> 00:16:04,673

to the rec center

tomorrow night, Timmy.

00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:06,132

I'll try to get

all the B-Bloods there.

00:16:06,257 --> 00:16:09,094

- Timmy!

- This is gonna be t-terrific!

00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,722

Tom, several years ago,

actor Christopher Reeve

00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:14,808

had a horrible accident

and was paralyzed.

00:16:14,933 --> 00:16:15,934

The irony, of course,

00:16:16,059 --> 00:16:18,853

was that the man who played

Superman could no longer walk.

00:16:18,979 --> 00:16:20,188

America watched in wonder

00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:22,857

as he managed to move one

of his fingers, then his arms.

00:16:22,983 --> 00:16:25,235

And now,

seen for the first time on HBC,

00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:28,655

Christopher Reeve is going to

lift a truck up over his head.

00:16:28,780 --> 00:16:30,907

[Dramatic music plays]

00:16:32,701 --> 00:16:34,285

[Cheers and applause]

00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:36,913

Oh, what a fighter.

- That brave, brave man.

00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:38,915

He's an inspiration to us all.

00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:41,251

Tom, the irony

is even more irony-y,

00:16:41,376 --> 00:16:43,128

as it appears

that the stem cells

00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,755

have given Christopher Reeve

almost superhuman strength.

00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,966

Chris, that's enough.

00:16:48,091 --> 00:16:50,468

Hello, Gene.

So good to see you.

00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:51,469

You're cured, Chris.

00:16:51,594 --> 00:16:53,471

It's time to stop using

stem cells.

00:16:53,596 --> 00:16:55,432

Stem-cell research

has made me stronger

00:16:55,557 --> 00:16:56,599

than I ever thought possible!

00:16:56,725 --> 00:16:57,600

Why stop now?

00:16:57,726 --> 00:16:59,352

Uh, Tom,

apparently Gene Hackman,

00:16:59,477 --> 00:17:01,813

the man who played Superman's

enemy Lex Luthor in the movies,

00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:05,233

has now shown up as a celebrity

protester of stem-cell research.

00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,777

If that isn't ironic, Tom,

I don't know what is.

00:17:07,902 --> 00:17:09,654

They're affecting your mind,

Chris.

00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:13,241

If you won't stop using

stem cells, then we'll stop you.

00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:16,327

Stop me?

Stop me? Ha!

00:17:16,453 --> 00:17:18,496

[Creaking]

00:17:18,621 --> 00:17:20,582

[Crowd screaming]

00:17:20,707 --> 00:17:22,250

[Dramatic music plays]

00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:24,711

You won't stop me, Hack Man!

00:17:24,836 --> 00:17:26,796

[Laughing]

00:17:29,007 --> 00:17:31,468

Tom, if irony were made

of strawberries,

00:17:31,593 --> 00:17:34,554

we'd all be drinking

a lot of smoothies right now.

00:17:35,305 --> 00:17:37,098

[Mid-tempo hip-hop playing]

00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:38,308

Come on in, everybody.

00:17:38,433 --> 00:17:41,478

Lots of s-surprises

and t-treats inside.

00:17:41,603 --> 00:17:44,355

Great to see you all.

What a terrific audience.

00:17:44,481 --> 00:17:47,233

You sure you got everything

you need, young man?

00:17:47,358 --> 00:17:48,943

We sure do.

Thanks, Mr. Appleb--by.

00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:50,487

Just remember to make sure

00:17:50,612 --> 00:17:52,739

the kids play safe

in the pool area.

00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:53,573

You bet.

00:17:53,698 --> 00:17:55,325

I'll be back at 7:00

to let you out.

00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:57,077

You kids have a good time.

00:17:57,202 --> 00:17:58,161

Oh, we will.

00:17:58,286 --> 00:18:00,163

[Keys jingling, latch locks]

00:18:00,288 --> 00:18:02,665

[Indistinct conversations]

00:18:02,791 --> 00:18:04,667

[Dramatic music plays]

00:18:04,793 --> 00:18:07,128

The Bloods!

- Oh shit! It's a trap!

00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:09,089

Motherfuckin' Crips

trying to smoke us all out!

00:18:09,214 --> 00:18:11,049

What the hell is going on here?

00:18:11,174 --> 00:18:12,759

It's called a lock-in

at the rec center.

00:18:12,884 --> 00:18:14,427

We can use

all the rec-center facilities.

00:18:14,552 --> 00:18:16,137

We can play b-basketball,

go swimming,

00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:17,472

or just kick it

in the lounge area

00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:19,099

with some games and p-puzzles.

00:18:19,224 --> 00:18:20,183

Timmy!

00:18:20,308 --> 00:18:21,893

But nobody can leave

until 7:00 a.m.,

00:18:22,018 --> 00:18:23,186

so if you want

to have a good time,

00:18:23,311 --> 00:18:24,938

you're all just gonna have

to learn to get along.

00:18:25,063 --> 00:18:27,982

[Guns cocking]

00:18:33,530 --> 00:18:36,533

[Singsong voice]

There's pizza.

00:18:36,658 --> 00:18:37,909

Tom, over five years ago,

00:18:38,034 --> 00:18:39,536

doctors told

actor Christopher Reeve

00:18:39,661 --> 00:18:41,162

that he would never walk again.

00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:42,872

But the resilient actor

fought back,

00:18:42,997 --> 00:18:44,165

struggled against all odds,

00:18:44,290 --> 00:18:47,377

and has now built

his very own legion of doom!

00:18:47,502 --> 00:18:50,296

The once immobile Mr. Reeve

says his new organization

00:18:50,421 --> 00:18:52,757

will be committed

to world domination and evil.

00:18:52,882 --> 00:18:55,260

What an inspirational story,

Tom.

00:18:55,385 --> 00:18:57,137

I have chosen each member

00:18:57,262 --> 00:18:59,097

of this elite group

of supervillains

00:18:59,222 --> 00:19:02,934

for their outstanding treachery,

their desire for world conquest,

00:19:03,059 --> 00:19:05,395

and their hatred

of all things good!

00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:08,273

And I've assembled this group

for one purpose --

00:19:08,398 --> 00:19:11,901

to once and for all find

a way to...

00:19:12,026 --> 00:19:14,070

get rid of Hack Man!

00:19:14,195 --> 00:19:16,447

[Laughs evilly]

00:19:17,031 --> 00:19:20,243

Uh, how about domination

of the world?

00:19:20,368 --> 00:19:22,871

Yeah, or, uh,

death to the infidels?

00:19:22,996 --> 00:19:23,955

Silence!

00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:25,540

Our job is to see to it

00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:27,750

that Hack Man is put

out of commission.

00:19:27,876 --> 00:19:29,210

Oh, boy, General Disarray.

00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:31,546

Maybe we just ought to stay out

of this one.

00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,965

Not so fast, Chris!

00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:35,258

Hack Man!

00:19:35,383 --> 00:19:37,886

We just helped pass a ban

on stem-cell research.

00:19:38,011 --> 00:19:40,430

Your fetus-sucking days

are over.

00:19:40,555 --> 00:19:42,390

No.

No!

00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:44,058

And now we're going to put you

somewhere

00:19:44,184 --> 00:19:47,103

where you can never touch

another fetus again.

00:19:47,979 --> 00:19:50,773

You stupid mofos are dead!

- Make the first shot, punk!

00:19:50,899 --> 00:19:53,151

Hold it!

Don't you see?

00:19:53,276 --> 00:19:55,236

It doesn't matter

if we were crippled from birth

00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:56,654

or crippled in an accident.

00:19:56,779 --> 00:19:58,156

We're all brothers.

00:19:58,281 --> 00:20:00,575

Save it, fool!

Crips ain't our brothers!

00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,535

Look, we have the whole

rec center to ourselves.

00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:04,454

Can't we all just try

having some fun together?

00:20:04,579 --> 00:20:05,914

You talking crazy, dog.

00:20:06,039 --> 00:20:07,707

Yeah.

We ain't playing, sucker!

00:20:07,832 --> 00:20:09,083

Why don't we at least give it

a chance?

00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:11,002

I mean, come on.

00:20:12,503 --> 00:20:15,340

Wait a minute.

What did you say?

00:20:15,465 --> 00:20:17,634

I said, "I mean, come on."

00:20:17,759 --> 00:20:19,052

[Down-tempo music plays]

00:20:19,177 --> 00:20:21,387

You know, maybe he's right.

00:20:21,512 --> 00:20:23,348

I mean, come on.

00:20:23,932 --> 00:20:24,974

Come on.

00:20:25,099 --> 00:20:28,394

I guess we could at least give

having fun together a try.

00:20:28,519 --> 00:20:29,729

It's like, come on.

00:20:29,854 --> 00:20:31,314

Yeah.

Come on.

00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:32,565

Yeah, that's right.

Come on.

00:20:32,690 --> 00:20:33,900

Come on.

- Come on.

00:20:34,025 --> 00:20:35,818

Yeah, come on.

- That's right. Come on.

00:20:35,944 --> 00:20:38,863

♪ P's and Q's are important

to avoid a squabble ♪

00:20:38,988 --> 00:20:41,491

♪ They break you off something,

break them something harder ♪

00:20:41,616 --> 00:20:44,702

♪ Make sure they ass understand

how you coming from, respect ♪

00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:46,120

Got to give you two dogs props

00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:47,956

for putting an end

to all this hate.

00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:49,999

I told you -- Lock-in

at the rec center always works.

00:20:50,124 --> 00:20:51,834

And, you know,

I've learned something, too.

00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:53,836

I was player-hating

C-Christopher butthole Reeve

00:20:53,962 --> 00:20:55,505

because he got more attention

than me.

00:20:55,630 --> 00:20:56,673

But just like y-you guys,

00:20:56,798 --> 00:20:59,259

I need to learn to control

my a-anger.

00:20:59,384 --> 00:21:00,385

Right on!

00:21:00,510 --> 00:21:03,054

Hey, little Roller,

try some of this chronic shit.

00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:04,264

Timmy!

00:21:04,389 --> 00:21:05,556

[ Inhales ]

00:21:05,682 --> 00:21:08,101

Well, I guess we all learned

that trying to get along

00:21:08,226 --> 00:21:10,186

is way better

than p-p-player hating.

00:21:10,311 --> 00:21:12,522

The gang wrote a song about it.

Why don't we listen in?

00:21:12,647 --> 00:21:15,191

♪ Used to be Crips and Bloods

didn't get along ♪

00:21:15,316 --> 00:21:17,735

♪ But now we're all a family,

so we wrote this song ♪

00:21:17,860 --> 00:21:20,154

♪ Na na na, Crips and Bloods ♪

00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:22,323

♪ Na na na, hope and love ♪

00:21:22,448 --> 00:21:24,867

♪ Na na na, friendly thugs ♪

00:21:25,743 --> 00:21:28,788

You haven't seen

the last of me, Hack Man!

00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:33,376

I will be ba-a-a-ck!

00:21:33,501 --> 00:21:35,670

Dude, I am so glad

we stayed out of that one.

00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:36,921

Me too.