Меха-Стрейзанд

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Did you like that episode,

South Park-eteers?

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You bet!

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Well, great, then you're

gonna love this next episode.

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It's our favorite episode.

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It's entitled

"Mecha-Streisand."

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In it, we follow

the real-life exploits

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of singer Barbra Streisand

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as she tries to take over

the world.

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You know, South Park-eteers,

a lot of our fans ask us,

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"Do you really hate

the celebrities you make fun of

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in 'South Park'?"

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And the answer is,

of course not.

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It's all just in good fun.

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Except when it comes

to Barbra Streisand.

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We hate her.

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And in fact,

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we're pretending

the Indian Companion

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is Barbra Streisand right now.

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That's why we're kicking her.

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Shut up, Barbra Streisand.

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Hooray!

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Well, time to sit back,

relax,

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and let's have

a rootin'-tootin',

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yippee-ti-yi-yo

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grandma-humpin' time with

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"Mecha-Streisand."

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Yee-haw!

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Hooray!

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♪ I'm going down

to South Park ♪

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♪ Gonna have

myself a time ♪

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♪ Friendly faces

everywhere ♪

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♪ Humble folks

without temptation ♪

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♪ Going down

to South Park ♪

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♪ Gonna leave my

woes behind ♪

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♪ Ample parking

day or night ♪

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♪ People spouting:

"Howdy neighbor." ♪

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♪ Headed on up

to South Park ♪

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♪ Gonna see if

I can't unwind ♪

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♪ So come on down

to South Park ♪

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♪ And meet some

friends of mine ♪

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And so, these ancient

arrowheads are buried

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deep down in the Earth's crust!

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We dig 'em up, polish 'em off

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and find over twelve new

arrowheads every month!

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Booorrrring.

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Eric, keep quiet!

I'm trying to sleep!

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Now, can anybody tell me who

left these arrowheads here?

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Isn't that your job?

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Well, yes, but I want to see

if you're learning anything.

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Oh.

- Okay, I tell you what.

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Why don't we all grab our

little anthropology pickaxes

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that were handed out

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and we'll dig for our very own

Indian Arrowheads!

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♪ Day is never finished ♪

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♪ Massa got me working ♪

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♪ Someday massa set me free ♪

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Dude, shut up, Cartman!

- Ooh, ooh!

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I think I found one!

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No, I found it.

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Oh, I do believe

I found it first.

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No, I did, Pip!

- Oh, dear.

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Well, guess we'll have to

Roshambo for it.

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What do you mean?

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Well, first I kick you in

the nuts as hard as I can.

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Then you kick me in the nuts

as hard as you can.

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And we keep going back and

forth until somebody falls.

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Last one standing gets

the arrowhead.

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Oh, my.

Well, I suppose if I must...

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Okay, ready? I'll go first.

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Well, I guess you win.

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I don't care, you can have

the stupid arrowhead.

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I don't want it.

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♪ Day is never finished ♪

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♪ Massa got me working ♪

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Oh, look, I found

another one.

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Aw, this is just a stupid

triangle!

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Whoa, check it out, dude.

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It's got little drawings

on it.

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What is it?

- I don't know.

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Whoa!

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That was cool!

- Hey, give me that back!

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You threw it away, Cartman.

It's mine now.

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We'll Roshambo for it.

- No way, fatty. It's mine.

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Anthropologist!

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How's it going, boys?

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I found a magic triangle

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and this greedy

son of a bitch took it from me!

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You threw it away, fatso!

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Let me see that.

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Why, this is Anastasi writing!

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My God, this must be

thousands of years old!

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Come on, let me kick you

in the nuts for it!

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And finally tonight,

a young boy

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from South Park, Colorado found

something very interesting

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during a field trip today.

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Here with a special report

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is a quadriplegic Swiss man

on a pony.

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Thanks Tom.

The little eight year old

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was very shocked indeed

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when he came across a very

ancient triangular object.

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Well, I was just digging

around, and I was all like,

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"Dude, I found this triangle."

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And my friends were all like,

"Dude," and I was all, "Dude."

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And I told him,

I said, "Kyle,

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I will kick you in the nuts."

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But he didn't give it

back to me.

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So I kicked him square

in the nuts...

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And he cried like

Nancy Kerrigan.

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You liar, Cartman!

- Screw you, triangle thief!

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And so, the little boy will

take his discovery home

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and perhaps donate it to

science...

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A little later.

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Back to you, Dave.

- Thanks, Tom.

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Those are some cute, cute kids.

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Except for that last one.

He's a little tubby.

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Hey!

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What are you gonna

do with it, dude?

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I'm gonna put it in my room,

where Cartman can't find it.

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Oh I'll find it,

don't worry!

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Goddammit! Gimme my triangle,

Kyle, seriously!

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You did throw it away,

Cartman.

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I was just setting it aside.

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Well, you might as well

let it go.

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Never! I'll get that triangle

if it's the last thing I do!

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♪ Gimme a little bit

of that pepper ♪

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♪ Gimme a little bit

of that salt ♪

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♪ Put it in the

skillet and cook it ♪

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Excuse me, sir.

- Can I help--hey.

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You're that movie

critic guy on TV.

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Leonard Maltin, yes.

- Well I'll be a teenage girl

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backstage at an

Aerosmith concert.

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Leonard Maltin in

my cafeteria!

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I'm Chef.

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I know who you are.

You must listen to me, Chef.

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We have precious little time.

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Have you seen Barbra Streisand

recently?

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Barbra Streisand?

You mean, like,

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THE Barbra Streisand?

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Have you seen her?!

- No.

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Not since "Yentl."

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Thank God.

Then I'm not too late.

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Too late for what?

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Chef, it is of the upmost

importance

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that you tell me where

those little boys

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from the news report on TV are.

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Why do you care?

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I have a button we can use

for his nose.

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What would you use a marble

sack for?

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Be careful where

you put that carrot.

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Kyle might steal it.

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I didn't steal anything.

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Stan, would you tell Kyle

that I'm not speaking with him?

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Good!

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What's that noise?

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Whoa!

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Aah! Aliens!

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Who is the boy I saw on

the news report tonight?

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Hello there, little boy.

Do you know who I am?

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No.

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Oh, I bet you do.

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♪ I'm going... ♪

- Aah! Stop that!

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♪ Where there's lucky

clovers in the sun... ♪

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Yeah, that sucks, dude.

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I'm Barbra Streisand!

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So?

- So...

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So I'm a very famous

and very important individual.

00:06:06,367 --> 00:06:07,743

Like John Elway important?

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What?!

- Do you know John Elway?

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No.

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Oh, so you're really famous

and important

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but you don't know John Elway.

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Look, little boy,

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I understand that you found a

neat little triangle near here.

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You know what I'm talking

about?

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Yeah...

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No, I found it.

He stole it.

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You threw it away, Cartman!

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I'm not talking to him,

because he's a dirty thief.

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Little boy, does the triangle

have a symbol of two snakes

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joined at the middle?

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Yeah, how'd you know?

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Okay, now this is

very important.

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Where is the Triangle

of Zinthar now?

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Triangle of Zinthar?

00:06:39,066 --> 00:06:40,651

Why do you want to know,

lady?

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I'm not talking to you,

you pissant little hick!

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Whoa, dude!

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Where is the Triangle,

damn it?!

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Aaagh!

00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:48,867

What seems to be

the problemo here?

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Problemo? There's no

problemo, Officer.

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I was just introducing myself

to these charming little boys.

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Nu-uh!

She was being a total bitch!

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Boys, shouldn't you

be in school?

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It's Saturday.

- No excuses!

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Move along, you little

troublemakers.

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Well?!

- Well what?

00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:12,558

You know who I am, don't you?

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Well, you ain't Fiona Apple.

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And if you ain't Fiona Apple,

I don't give a rat's ass

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Argh!

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Hoo! What a bitch!

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I guess he's not home,

Leonard Maltin.

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Damn! Then we must look

for them elsewhere.

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Now, come on, man!

What is this all about?

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If Barbara Streisand saw

the same news report I did,

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then those boys

are in grave danger.

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If you were Barbra Streisand,

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where would you be

right now?

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Hmm.

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No, no! I mean where would

she be staying?

00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:46,133

Oh, uh, well, I always heard

that Mrs. Streisand

00:07:46,258 --> 00:07:47,968

had her own $4 million

condominium

00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:49,219

up near the ski slope.

00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:50,721

Where?

- I don't know.

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I-it was just a rumor.

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Damn it, man,

where is your car?!

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He has it, Milo.

00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:01,523

That little bastard has

the Triangle.

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Are you sure?

- I'm sure!

00:08:03,650 --> 00:08:05,611

He knew about the symbol

of Krulock!

00:08:05,736 --> 00:08:07,154

Then why don't we go get it?

00:08:07,279 --> 00:08:08,947

A cop showed up.

He's a clever one.

00:08:09,072 --> 00:08:10,616

I can't blow everything now

that I'm this close.

00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:13,494

Everything must be handled

very carefully.

00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:20,000

How many years has it been,

Milo? 30? 40?

00:08:20,125 --> 00:08:23,921

For so long, I have waited

to find the other triangle.

00:08:24,046 --> 00:08:26,131

And now I am so close.

00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:29,134

The dawn of Zinthar

is close at hand!

00:09:00,958 --> 00:09:02,417

Cartman?

00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:04,211

You scared the crap

out of me, Ike!

00:09:04,336 --> 00:09:05,420

What the hell are you doing?!

00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:07,005

I'm trying to get my tri--

00:09:07,130 --> 00:09:08,131

wait a minute, I'm not

talking to you!

00:09:08,257 --> 00:09:09,633

Ike, will you tell Kyle

00:09:09,758 --> 00:09:11,176

that I was trying to get

my triangle back?

00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:16,306

Well, Ike, you can tell

Cartman that it's my triangle!

00:09:18,517 --> 00:09:20,852

Well you can tell Kyle he's a

dirty goddamn son of a bitch!!

00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:23,605

All right, all right!

00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:25,315

If it means that much to you,

take the stupid triangle!

00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,067

Huh?

- If it'll make you

00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:28,235

leave me alone, then just take

the damn thing.

00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:29,528

Here.

00:09:29,653 --> 00:09:31,530

There. Now get out of my house.

00:09:31,655 --> 00:09:33,615

And I hope you feel really,

really good about yourself.

00:09:34,950 --> 00:09:37,119

Hell yeah, I do.

I got the triangle.

00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:40,080

♪ I got the triangle,

I got the triangle ♪

00:09:40,205 --> 00:09:41,832

♪ You don't, you don't ♪

00:09:43,584 --> 00:09:45,919

Are you sure Barbra Streisand

has a condo up here?

00:09:46,044 --> 00:09:47,588

It was just a rumor.

00:09:47,713 --> 00:09:49,381

A lot of big celebrities

have mountain condos.

00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:51,091

Then we've got to keep

looking.

00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:52,634

All right, Leonard Maltin,

00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,052

this has gone far enough.

00:09:54,177 --> 00:09:55,679

I ain't driving another mile

00:09:55,804 --> 00:09:57,556

till you tell me what

this is all about.

00:09:57,681 --> 00:09:59,600

Haven't you ever been curious

about the insanity

00:09:59,725 --> 00:10:01,476

Barbra Streisand exhibits?

00:10:01,602 --> 00:10:04,605

Well, I always heard she was

kind of a bitch, but--

00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:06,106

More than a bitch, Chef!

00:10:06,231 --> 00:10:07,107

She's a calculating,

self-centered,

00:10:07,232 --> 00:10:08,942

egotistical bitch.

00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,902

She was born in a small town,

her mother was a jackal,

00:10:11,028 --> 00:10:12,946

and her father was

an insurance salesman.

00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:15,115

Ooh.

Insurance salesman?

00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:16,533

When she was five, she knew

that she wanted

00:10:16,658 --> 00:10:17,743

to be a famous singer.

00:10:17,868 --> 00:10:19,411

But by the time she was six,

00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:20,829

her ambitions became

to rule the universe.

00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:21,997

She learned of an ancient

diamond.

00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:23,498

The diamond of Pantheos.

00:10:23,624 --> 00:10:25,584

Okay, you know what?

Never mind.

00:10:25,709 --> 00:10:27,961

I don't need to know all this.

Forget I asked.

00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:29,630

Before she was seven,

the keepers of Pantheos

00:10:29,755 --> 00:10:30,756

learned of this insane little

girl's wish.

00:10:30,881 --> 00:10:32,466

The diamond was split up

00:10:32,591 --> 00:10:34,259

and buried at opposite ends

of the world.

00:10:34,384 --> 00:10:35,969

But then, during the shooting

of "My Fair Lady,"

00:10:36,094 --> 00:10:38,013

Barbra Streisand found

one of the triangles.

00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:40,682

And the other triangle is

the one that little Kyle has?

00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:42,601

Yes, Mr. Chef.

If Babs get ahold

00:10:42,726 --> 00:10:45,062

of that other triangle,

she will fulfill her prophecy

00:10:45,187 --> 00:10:48,649

and become the most threatening

thing ever known to mankind...

00:10:48,774 --> 00:10:50,150

Mecha-Streisand.

00:10:50,275 --> 00:10:51,818

Mecha-Streisand?

00:10:51,943 --> 00:10:54,029

Oh man, I don't know

what the hell that means,

00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:55,989

but it doesn't sound good.

00:10:56,114 --> 00:10:57,991

Man, the bus sure is late.

00:10:58,116 --> 00:11:00,661

Hmmm, I wonder what I should

do with my triangle,

00:11:00,786 --> 00:11:02,871

now that it is my triangle.

00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:05,248

Damn it, Cartman, I gave it

to you so you would shut up.

00:11:08,126 --> 00:11:10,504

Oh, hello there, little boys.

00:11:10,629 --> 00:11:11,963

How are you today?

00:11:12,089 --> 00:11:13,882

Fine.

- That is great.

00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:15,884

My name is Mrs. Jones.

00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:19,012

And I am a very friendly,

nice person.

00:11:19,137 --> 00:11:22,265

I hear that one of you found

my triangle.

00:11:22,391 --> 00:11:23,475

Your triangle?

00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:26,269

Yes. You see, that triangle

00:11:26,395 --> 00:11:28,855

is part of my

kidney dialysis machine.

00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:30,691

I'm so glad you found it,

00:11:30,816 --> 00:11:33,735

because without it, I was sure

to die within hours.

00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:35,529

Oh no, you don't!

Finders keepers!

00:11:35,654 --> 00:11:37,322

But I'll die!

00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:38,865

Well, I guess we'll have

to Roshambo for it.

00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:40,784

I'll kick you in the nuts

as hard as I can,

00:11:40,909 --> 00:11:42,703

then you kick me square in

the nuts as hard as you can.

00:11:42,828 --> 00:11:46,832

I want to give you a big

cash reward for finding it.

00:11:46,957 --> 00:11:49,710

It's worth a lot

of money to me.

00:11:49,835 --> 00:11:51,586

It is?

00:11:51,712 --> 00:11:53,463

Hey, no wonder that Barbara

Streisand lady wanted it!

00:11:53,588 --> 00:11:56,383

Oh, . Who is that?

00:11:56,508 --> 00:11:58,260

Oh, just this really,

really old lady

00:11:58,385 --> 00:11:59,970

who wishes she was

still only 45.

00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:03,557

Yeah, and you should have

seen her nose.

00:12:03,682 --> 00:12:05,225

It was big enough to land

stealth bombers on.

00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:10,147

Yeah, and talk about a bitch.

I haven't seen--

00:12:10,272 --> 00:12:11,523

Enough!

00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:13,358

Oh. Ha, ha.

00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:16,778

Anyway, if you'll come

with me in my car,

00:12:16,903 --> 00:12:19,614

I'll take you up to my

condo where I'll kill you--

00:12:19,740 --> 00:12:23,201

I mean, uh, give you money

for the triangle.

00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:25,245

Sweet! I'm gonna be rich!

00:12:25,370 --> 00:12:26,955

Bet you wish you wouldn't have

given me back that triangle

00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,957

now, huh, Kyle? Dumbass.

00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:31,042

Wait, isn't there some rule

about not getting into cars

00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:32,586

with strangers?

00:12:32,711 --> 00:12:34,212

No, not when money's

involved, stupid.

00:12:36,715 --> 00:12:38,633

And action.

00:12:38,759 --> 00:12:40,677

Rebecca, I'm a man.

00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:43,305

A man like any other with

dreams and emotions.

00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:46,141

And that's why I'll never put

a foreign object up my ass.

00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:47,642

Cut. Great. Print that.

00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:49,478

Excellent work, Sid.

Take five, guys.

00:12:49,603 --> 00:12:51,062

Let's set up for

the next shot.

00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:56,359

Hello.

- Ho?!

00:12:56,485 --> 00:12:58,028

You must hurry.

00:12:58,153 --> 00:12:59,696

A young man has found

the Triangle of Zinthar!

00:12:59,821 --> 00:13:01,615

Where?!

00:13:01,740 --> 00:13:03,700

A small, pissant, white-bread

mountain town in Colorado

00:13:03,825 --> 00:13:04,951

called South Park.

00:13:05,076 --> 00:13:06,661

Excellent.

00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:13,460

Soon, the Triangle of Zinthar

will be mine,

00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:17,756

and I will be the biggest,

most famous person ever!

00:13:17,881 --> 00:13:19,883

Let me go!

Seriously!

00:13:20,008 --> 00:13:21,218

Yeah, let us go!

00:13:21,343 --> 00:13:23,094

You fools have no idea

00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:24,971

the powers that you

are meddling with.

00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:29,601

I'll teach you to meddle

with my triangle!

00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:32,145

It's not my triangle!

00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:33,814

It's Kyle's!

- Hey!

00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:35,941

Don't try to pass it

back on me, fat-ass!

00:13:36,066 --> 00:13:38,860

Screw you, hippie!

00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:41,571

Where is the Triangle

of Zinthar?!

00:13:41,696 --> 00:13:43,281

I don't remember!

00:13:43,406 --> 00:13:45,242

Goddamn it, tell her!

I wanna go home!

00:13:45,367 --> 00:13:49,371

Maybe this will help

jar your memory.

00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:50,789

No! Don't!

00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:54,709

♪ There's a place for us... ♪

00:13:54,835 --> 00:13:57,587

Now do you remember?!

00:13:57,712 --> 00:14:01,258

Damn your black

heart, Barbra Streisand!

00:14:01,383 --> 00:14:03,426

I don't know how much more

I can take, dude!

00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:06,054

All right, you asked for it!

00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:10,058

♪ I'm gonna tell you now... ♪

00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:11,226

No!

00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,353

I don't know, man.

00:14:13,478 --> 00:14:16,106

Maybe Barbra Streisand doesn't

have a place up here after all.

00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:18,191

Looks like we'll have to go

to plan B.

00:14:18,316 --> 00:14:19,860

There's a plan B?

00:14:19,985 --> 00:14:22,070

Why the hell have we been

driving around all night

00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:24,114

and day for when

there's a plan B?

00:14:24,239 --> 00:14:26,241

Have you ever heard of

the band called 'The Cure'?

00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,201

Oh, come on.

00:14:28,326 --> 00:14:30,370

Don't tell me The Cure has

something to do with this too.

00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:32,831

No, no. Just the lead singer.

00:14:32,956 --> 00:14:34,499

Aah! Aah!

00:14:34,624 --> 00:14:37,252

Whoa! What's the matter,

Leonard Maltin?

00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:40,380

She's close! She's very

close! I can feel her.

00:14:40,505 --> 00:14:41,923

Where?

- She has the boys!

00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:43,592

T-they're in trouble!

00:14:43,717 --> 00:14:46,970

Oh, fudge!

- Keep going this way, hurry!

00:14:47,095 --> 00:14:50,682

♪ Happiness with you is like

happiness with... ♪

00:14:50,807 --> 00:14:53,059

Okay, okay!

00:14:53,184 --> 00:14:55,061

I'll tell you where

the triangle is!

00:14:55,186 --> 00:14:56,730

It's inside my shoe.

00:14:56,855 --> 00:14:58,398

Oh, for Christ's sake,

Cartman.

00:14:58,523 --> 00:15:00,358

When's the last time you

changed your socks?

00:15:00,483 --> 00:15:02,485

I suppose your socks smell

like the botanical gardens.

00:15:02,611 --> 00:15:05,947

Finally!

The triangle is mine!

00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:07,490

After centuries of waiting,

00:15:07,616 --> 00:15:11,494

I finally

have the Triangle of Zinthar!

00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:15,665

Now the Diamond of Pantheos

is complete!

00:15:19,044 --> 00:15:21,755

Sugoi! Kono hi wa!

00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:24,049

Atarashii hajimaru da!

00:15:24,174 --> 00:15:25,342

Ima kara!

00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:28,136

Atashi no namae wa!

00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,722

Whoa, dude!

00:15:33,224 --> 00:15:37,437

MECHA-BARBARA STREISAND DA!

00:15:42,067 --> 00:15:44,027

Dude, this is pretty

fucked up right here.

00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:48,657

Holy crap, Ned!

00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:50,951

That's the biggest goddamn

deer I've ever seen!

00:15:54,245 --> 00:15:55,997

And so just weeks after

00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:57,457

the devastating attack

of mutant genetic creatures,

00:15:57,582 --> 00:15:59,250

zombies, and Thanksgiving

turkeys,

00:15:59,376 --> 00:16:02,003

the town of South Park has

managed to rebuild itself

00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:03,588

once again b--

00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:07,968

Oh, goddamn it, not again.

00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:23,650

Mayor, Barbra Streisand is--

- I noticed.

00:16:23,775 --> 00:16:26,152

Call the National Guard!

00:16:26,277 --> 00:16:29,072

Oh, we'll get you, you bitch.

00:16:29,197 --> 00:16:33,118

And to think I actually watched

your HBO special!

00:16:34,953 --> 00:16:36,746

- Children!

- Chef!

00:16:36,871 --> 00:16:38,373

Oh, no, no!

00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:40,250

She has joined the two

triangles?

00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:42,043

Yeah, she stole my triangle!

00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:45,797

Get us down from here.

- I can't break these locks.

00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:47,924

Stand back, Chef.

00:16:48,049 --> 00:16:49,759

Marutang ray!

00:16:52,595 --> 00:16:53,972

Whoa, that was cool!

00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:55,598

I've got to go after

Mecha-Streisand.

00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:57,559

Chef, I need you to call

Robert Smith of The Cure

00:16:57,684 --> 00:17:00,353

at this number.

- Robert Smith? Sweet.

00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:03,565

Hello?

- Uh, yes.

00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:05,316

Is this Robert Smith

of The Cure?

00:17:05,442 --> 00:17:07,193

Yes, it is.

- This may sound kinda strange,

00:17:07,318 --> 00:17:10,113

but Leonard Maltin

asked me to call you.

00:17:10,238 --> 00:17:13,158

Oh, so Barbara Streisand's

found the other triangle, eh?

00:17:16,453 --> 00:17:19,039

All right, men. Give her

everything you've got.

00:17:26,463 --> 00:17:27,797

Get around side her, Ned!

00:17:27,922 --> 00:17:29,674

I can't get a shot in

from here!

00:17:29,799 --> 00:17:31,051

Okay.

00:17:32,844 --> 00:17:35,638

Ah, ah, I'm scared.

00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:45,899

It's no use!

00:17:46,024 --> 00:17:47,692

Our firepower has no effect!

00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:50,070

Oh, my God, it is you!

00:17:50,195 --> 00:17:53,364

Oh, I am such a huge fan,

Ms. Streisand!

00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:56,076

I never thought I'd live

to see you in person!

00:17:56,201 --> 00:17:57,327

KRAGHGHGH!

00:17:57,452 --> 00:17:59,037

I hate to ask this,

00:17:59,162 --> 00:18:00,538

but could I get an autograph?

00:18:00,663 --> 00:18:02,290

My sister would die!

00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,792

GRAGHGHGH!

00:18:06,544 --> 00:18:08,963

Oh thank you, Ms. Streisand!

00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:17,222

We're doomed!

Goodbye, Mr. Hat.

00:18:20,558 --> 00:18:21,810

Barbra!

00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:26,606

Kitte! Kitte! Churi-pu!

00:18:26,731 --> 00:18:30,985

♪ Leonard Maltin ♪

00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:37,909

Look out, children!

00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:42,664

Ahhhh!

00:18:49,129 --> 00:18:50,213

Oh, no!

00:18:53,925 --> 00:18:55,927

Oh, my God,

they killed Kenny!

00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:57,595

You bastards!

00:19:00,515 --> 00:19:01,683

What's going on here?

00:19:01,808 --> 00:19:03,226

Sidney Poitier?

00:19:03,351 --> 00:19:05,270

That's right.

I'm Sidney Poitier.

00:19:05,395 --> 00:19:07,772

Damn, man,

it's nice to meet you.

00:19:07,897 --> 00:19:10,775

The Sidney Poitier

in my hometown.

00:19:10,900 --> 00:19:13,486

Barbra Streisand has found

the Triangle of Zinthar?

00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:15,989

Yep, she's made the Diamond

of Pantheos, all right.

00:19:16,114 --> 00:19:17,991

Koora Koo-ra-suki!

00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:21,995

♪ Mega-Poitier... ♪

00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:29,752

Is that really necessary?

00:19:43,391 --> 00:19:44,726

It's over.

00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:46,144

She's too strong for them,

children.

00:19:46,269 --> 00:19:48,062

We'll have to leave town.

00:19:48,188 --> 00:19:49,522

Make it go away.

00:19:49,647 --> 00:19:51,274

I hate Barbra Streisand!

I hate her!

00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:52,901

My mom always said

there were no monsters,

00:19:53,026 --> 00:19:54,402

but there are,

aren't there, Chef?

00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:57,197

We have to say goodbye

to South Park.

00:19:57,322 --> 00:20:00,116

Oh, my God!

Help me!

00:20:03,203 --> 00:20:04,996

Am I too late?

- Who are you?

00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:06,581

Dude! That's Robert Smith

of The Cure!

00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:07,957

Sweet!

- Here, you boys

00:20:08,082 --> 00:20:09,250

hold this walkie.

00:20:09,375 --> 00:20:10,460

You can help me find her.

00:20:10,585 --> 00:20:11,920

You can try, Robert Smith,

00:20:12,045 --> 00:20:13,588

but that thing

just beat the crap

00:20:13,713 --> 00:20:15,590

out of Leonard Maltin

and Sidney Poitier!

00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:17,592

I have to try.

00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:20,303

I can't let Barbara Streisand

do this to the entire world.

00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:24,307

♪ Robert Smith, Robert Smith... ♪

00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:39,489

We must tell him that her

weak point is the nose.

00:20:39,614 --> 00:20:42,867

Robert Smith, hit her nose.

Use robot punch!

00:20:50,250 --> 00:20:51,459

The Diamond of Pantheos!

00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:53,002

She must be powerless now.

00:20:53,127 --> 00:20:55,046

Quickly, Robert Smith.

She's powerless!!

00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:59,175

♪ Robert Smith, Robert Smith... ♪

00:21:06,933 --> 00:21:08,268

He did it!

00:21:08,393 --> 00:21:10,645

No more

Barbra Streisand ever!

00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:12,647

Wow, Robert Smith

is the greatest person

00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:13,731

that ever lived.

00:21:13,856 --> 00:21:14,816

Our savior!

00:21:16,693 --> 00:21:19,404

Can I have my walkie-talkie

back now, please?

00:21:19,529 --> 00:21:22,073

No way. You gave it to us.

It's mine now.

00:21:22,198 --> 00:21:24,617

All right, I'll Roshambo you

for it.

00:21:24,742 --> 00:21:25,743

Ready?

- Huh?

00:21:29,414 --> 00:21:31,666

Hey, where's he going?

00:21:31,791 --> 00:21:33,334

Goodbye, Robert Smith!

00:21:33,459 --> 00:21:35,586

Thank you for your help.

Visit us again.

00:21:35,712 --> 00:21:38,256

"Disintegration" is the best

album ever!

00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:46,597

Well, what should we do with

the two triangles now?

00:21:46,723 --> 00:21:48,057

We've got to get rid of them.

00:21:48,182 --> 00:21:49,142

Nobody should have

the kind of power

00:21:49,267 --> 00:21:50,935

Barbra Streisand wanted.

00:21:51,060 --> 00:21:52,395

Well, at least I have this

sweet walkie-talkie

00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:53,646

Robert Smith gave me.

00:21:53,771 --> 00:21:54,856

No! That's my walkie-talkie!

00:21:54,981 --> 00:21:56,649

He gave it to me!

00:21:56,774 --> 00:21:58,484

Dammit, Cartman, don't you

ever learn anything?

00:21:58,609 --> 00:22:01,237

Come on, Stan, it's mine.

I'll Roshambo you for it.

00:22:01,362 --> 00:22:02,697

Go to hell, Cartman.

00:22:04,198 --> 00:22:05,950

Well, that whole experience

sure did suck.

00:22:06,075 --> 00:22:08,036

Yeah, I'm sure glad

that's over with.

00:22:08,161 --> 00:22:09,996

But you know, I've

learned something today.

00:22:10,121 --> 00:22:12,206

I've learned that people

who want power, a lot of power,

00:22:12,332 --> 00:22:13,666

always end up dead.

00:22:13,791 --> 00:22:15,668

Yeah.

- Yes, and I've

00:22:15,793 --> 00:22:16,878

something too.

00:22:17,003 --> 00:22:18,463

Robert Smith kicks ass.

00:22:20,506 --> 00:22:22,216

Oh, no! She's back!

00:22:22,342 --> 00:22:24,218

Oh, my God! Look!

00:22:27,221 --> 00:22:29,349

Aaah! Mecha-Ike!

00:00:03,754 --> 00:00:07,174

[flatulence]

[laughter]

00:00:07,299 --> 00:00:08,509

Did you like that episode,

South Park-eteers?

00:00:08,634 --> 00:00:10,469

children: You bet!

00:00:10,594 --> 00:00:11,929

Well, great, then you're

gonna love this next episode.

00:00:12,054 --> 00:00:13,389

It's our favorite episode.

00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:14,974

It's entitled

"Mecha-Streisand."

00:00:15,099 --> 00:00:17,351

In it, we follow

the real-life exploits

00:00:17,476 --> 00:00:18,811

of singer Barbra Streisand

00:00:18,936 --> 00:00:20,688

as she tries to take over

the world.

00:00:20,813 --> 00:00:22,940

You know, South Park-eteers,

a lot of our fans ask us,

00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:25,109

"Do you really hate

the celebrities you make fun of

00:00:25,234 --> 00:00:26,610

in 'South Park'?"

00:00:26,736 --> 00:00:28,446

And the answer is,

of course not.

00:00:28,571 --> 00:00:30,072

It's all just in good fun.

00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:32,241

Except when it comes

to Barbra Streisand.

00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:33,451

We hate her.

00:00:33,576 --> 00:00:34,910

[giggles] And in fact,

00:00:35,036 --> 00:00:36,412

we're pretending

the Indian Companion

00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:37,663

is Barbra Streisand right now.

00:00:37,788 --> 00:00:39,123

That's why we're kicking her.

00:00:39,248 --> 00:00:41,125

[laughs]

Shut up, Barbra Streisand.

00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:42,501

children: Hooray!

00:00:42,626 --> 00:00:43,961

Well, time to sit back,

relax,

00:00:44,086 --> 00:00:45,171

and let's have

a rootin'-tootin',

00:00:45,296 --> 00:00:46,422

yippee-ti-yi-yo

00:00:46,547 --> 00:00:48,257

grandma-humpin' time with

00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:49,425

"Mecha-Streisand."

00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:50,551

Yee-haw!

00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:53,971

[gunshot]

children: Hooray!

00:01:00,644 --> 00:01:03,981

[twangy music]

00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:05,483

♪ I'm going down

to South Park ♪

00:01:05,608 --> 00:01:07,485

♪ Gonna have

myself a time ♪

00:01:07,610 --> 00:01:09,195

all: ♪ Friendly faces

everywhere ♪

00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:10,738

♪ Humble folks

without temptation ♪

00:01:10,863 --> 00:01:12,198

♪ Going down

to South Park ♪

00:01:12,323 --> 00:01:14,033

♪ Gonna leave my

woes behind ♪

00:01:14,158 --> 00:01:15,743

♪ Ample parking

day or night ♪

00:01:15,868 --> 00:01:17,244

♪ People spouting:

"Howdy neighbor!" ♪

00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:18,746

♪ Headed on up

to South Park ♪

00:01:18,871 --> 00:01:20,498

♪ Gonna see if

I can't unwind ♪

00:01:20,623 --> 00:01:23,667

[singing indistinctly]

00:01:23,793 --> 00:01:25,169

♪ So come on down

to South Park ♪

00:01:25,294 --> 00:01:26,962

♪ And meet some

friends of mine ♪

00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:30,883

And so, these ancient

arrowheads are buried

00:01:31,008 --> 00:01:32,760

deep down in the Earth's crust!

00:01:32,885 --> 00:01:34,470

We dig 'em up, polish 'em off

00:01:34,595 --> 00:01:37,056

and find over twelve new

arrowheads every month!

00:01:37,181 --> 00:01:39,642

Booorrrring.

[laughter]

00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:42,686

Eric, keep quiet!

I'm trying to sleep!

00:01:42,812 --> 00:01:46,398

Now, can anybody tell me who

left these arrowheads here?

00:01:46,524 --> 00:01:48,400

Isn't that your job?

00:01:48,526 --> 00:01:50,820

Well, yes, but I want to see

if you're learning anything.

00:01:50,945 --> 00:01:53,030

Oh.

- Okay, I tell you what.

00:01:53,155 --> 00:01:55,574

Why don't we all grab our

little anthropology pickaxes

00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:57,368

that were handed out

00:01:57,493 --> 00:01:59,537

and we'll dig for our very own

Indian Arrowheads!

00:01:59,662 --> 00:02:01,747

[cheering]

00:02:03,124 --> 00:02:05,167

♪ Day is never finished ♪

00:02:05,292 --> 00:02:07,086

♪ Massa got me working ♪

00:02:07,211 --> 00:02:09,672

♪ Someday massa set me free ♪

00:02:09,797 --> 00:02:11,966

Dude, shut up, Cartman!

- Ooh, ooh!

00:02:12,091 --> 00:02:13,217

I think I found one!

00:02:13,342 --> 00:02:14,927

No, I found it.

00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:16,929

Oh, I do believe

I found it first.

00:02:17,054 --> 00:02:18,973

No, I did, Pip!

- Oh, dear.

00:02:19,098 --> 00:02:20,599

Well, guess we'll have to

Roshambo for it.

00:02:20,724 --> 00:02:22,518

What do you mean?

00:02:22,643 --> 00:02:25,396

Well, first I kick you in

the nuts as hard as I can.

00:02:25,521 --> 00:02:27,565

Then you kick me in the nuts

as hard as you can.

00:02:27,690 --> 00:02:29,775

And we keep going back and

forth until somebody falls.

00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:31,402

Last one standing gets

the arrowhead.

00:02:31,527 --> 00:02:34,572

Oh, my.

Well, I suppose if I must...

00:02:34,697 --> 00:02:36,323

Okay, ready? I'll go first.

00:02:36,448 --> 00:02:39,869

[yelps, coughs]

00:02:39,994 --> 00:02:41,287

[laughter]

00:02:41,412 --> 00:02:43,122

Well, I guess you win.

00:02:43,247 --> 00:02:44,540

I don't care, you can have

the stupid arrowhead.

00:02:44,665 --> 00:02:46,333

I don't want it.

00:02:48,294 --> 00:02:49,920

♪ Day is never finished ♪

00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:52,173

♪ Massa got me working ♪

00:02:52,298 --> 00:02:54,758

Oh, look, I found

another one.

00:02:56,010 --> 00:02:58,345

Aw, this is just a stupid

triangle!

00:02:58,470 --> 00:03:01,223

Whoa, check it out, dude.

00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:02,808

It's got little drawings

on it.

00:03:02,933 --> 00:03:04,476

What is it?

- I don't know.

00:03:04,602 --> 00:03:06,145

[shimmering tone]

Whoa!

00:03:06,270 --> 00:03:08,647

That was cool!

- Hey, give me that back!

00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:10,649

You threw it away, Cartman.

It's mine now.

00:03:10,774 --> 00:03:13,319

We'll Roshambo for it.

- No way, fatty. It's mine.

00:03:13,444 --> 00:03:14,862

Anthropologist!

00:03:14,987 --> 00:03:16,155

How's it going, boys?

00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:17,948

I found a magic triangle

00:03:18,073 --> 00:03:19,450

and this greedy

son of a bitch took it from me!

00:03:19,575 --> 00:03:20,784

You threw it away, fatso!

00:03:20,910 --> 00:03:22,036

Let me see that.

00:03:22,161 --> 00:03:23,996

Why, this is Anastasi writing!

00:03:24,121 --> 00:03:26,332

My God, this must be

thousands of years old!

00:03:26,457 --> 00:03:28,584

Come on, let me kick you

in the nuts for it!

00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:32,254

And finally tonight,

a young boy

00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:34,924

from South Park, Colorado found

something very interesting

00:03:35,049 --> 00:03:36,550

during a field trip today.

00:03:36,675 --> 00:03:38,135

Here with a special report

00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:40,262

is a quadriplegic Swiss man

on a pony.

00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:41,472

Thanks Tom.

The little eight year old

00:03:41,597 --> 00:03:43,390

was very shocked indeed

00:03:43,515 --> 00:03:45,726

when he came across a very

ancient triangular object.

00:03:45,851 --> 00:03:47,603

Well, I was just digging

around, and I was all like,

00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:49,688

"Dude, I found this triangle."

00:03:49,813 --> 00:03:51,565

And my friends were all like,

"Dude," and I was all, "Dude."

00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:53,192

And I told him,

I said, "Kyle,

00:03:53,317 --> 00:03:54,693

I will kick you in the nuts."

00:03:54,818 --> 00:03:56,237

But he didn't give it

back to me.

00:03:56,362 --> 00:03:57,696

So I kicked him square

in the nuts...

00:03:57,821 --> 00:03:59,531

And he cried like

Nancy Kerrigan.

00:03:59,657 --> 00:04:01,742

You liar, Cartman!

- Screw you, triangle thief!

00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:04,203

And so, the little boy will

take his discovery home

00:04:04,328 --> 00:04:05,871

and perhaps donate it to

science...

00:04:05,996 --> 00:04:07,331

A little later.

00:04:07,456 --> 00:04:08,624

Back to you, Dave.

- Thanks, Tom.

00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,292

Those are some cute, cute kids.

00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:11,919

Except for that last one.

He's a little tubby.

00:04:12,044 --> 00:04:13,420

Hey!

00:04:13,545 --> 00:04:15,422

What are you gonna

do with it, dude?

00:04:15,547 --> 00:04:17,174

I'm gonna put it in my room,

where Cartman can't find it.

00:04:17,299 --> 00:04:19,093

Oh I'll find it,

don't worry!

00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:23,222

Goddammit! Gimme my triangle,

Kyle, seriously!

00:04:23,347 --> 00:04:24,682

You did throw it away,

Cartman.

00:04:24,807 --> 00:04:26,141

I was just setting it aside.

00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:28,227

Well, you might as well

let it go.

00:04:28,352 --> 00:04:30,521

Never! I'll get that triangle

if it's the last thing I do!

00:04:30,646 --> 00:04:32,189

[dramatic musical flourish]

00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:33,857

♪ Gimme a little bit

of that pepper ♪

00:04:33,983 --> 00:04:35,526

♪ Gimme a little bit

of that salt ♪

00:04:35,651 --> 00:04:36,986

♪ Put it in the

skillet and cook it ♪

00:04:37,111 --> 00:04:38,737

Excuse me, sir.

- Can I help--hey.

00:04:38,862 --> 00:04:41,031

You're that movie

critic guy on TV.

00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:43,659

Leonard Maltin, yes.

- Well I'll be a teenage girl

00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:45,828

backstage at an

Aerosmith concert.

00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:48,247

Leonard Maltin in

my cafeteria!

00:04:48,372 --> 00:04:50,082

I'm Chef.

00:04:50,207 --> 00:04:51,834

I know who you are.

You must listen to me, Chef.

00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:53,377

We have precious little time.

00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:55,504

Have you seen Barbra Streisand

recently?

00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,172

Barbra Streisand?

You mean, like,

00:04:57,298 --> 00:04:58,716

THE Barbra Streisand?

00:04:58,841 --> 00:05:00,175

Have you seen her?!

- No.

00:05:00,301 --> 00:05:01,677

Not since "Yentl."

00:05:01,802 --> 00:05:03,387

Thank God.

Then I'm not too late.

00:05:03,512 --> 00:05:04,972

Too late for what?

00:05:05,097 --> 00:05:06,682

Chef, it is of the upmost

importance

00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:08,017

that you tell me where

those little boys

00:05:08,142 --> 00:05:09,476

from the news report on TV are.

00:05:09,601 --> 00:05:11,478

Why do you care?

00:05:13,230 --> 00:05:14,773

I have a button we can use

for his nose.

00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:17,151

[muffled speech]

00:05:17,276 --> 00:05:18,736

What would you use a marble

sack for?

00:05:18,861 --> 00:05:20,112

Be careful where

you put that carrot.

00:05:20,237 --> 00:05:21,322

Kyle might steal it.

00:05:21,447 --> 00:05:23,407

I didn't steal anything.

00:05:23,532 --> 00:05:25,701

Stan, would you tell Kyle

that I'm not speaking with him?

00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:27,119

Good!

00:05:27,244 --> 00:05:29,663

[whirring]

- What's that noise?

00:05:29,788 --> 00:05:31,081

Whoa!

00:05:31,206 --> 00:05:32,583

Aah! Aliens!

00:05:32,708 --> 00:05:35,836

[ominous music]

00:05:35,961 --> 00:05:39,465

♪♪

00:05:39,590 --> 00:05:42,843

Who is the boy I saw on

the news report tonight?

00:05:44,345 --> 00:05:46,472

Hello there, little boy.

Do you know who I am?

00:05:46,597 --> 00:05:47,639

No.

00:05:47,765 --> 00:05:49,475

Oh, I bet you do.

00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:53,145

♪ I'm going... ♪

- Aah! Stop that!

00:05:53,270 --> 00:05:56,565

♪ Where there's lucky

clovers in the sun... ♪

00:05:56,690 --> 00:05:57,858

Yeah, that sucks, dude.

00:05:57,983 --> 00:05:59,902

I'm Barbra Streisand!

00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:01,820

So?

- So...

00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:06,241

So I'm a very famous

and very important individual.

00:06:06,367 --> 00:06:07,743

Like John Elway important?

00:06:07,868 --> 00:06:09,411

What?!

- Do you know John Elway?

00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:11,121

No.

00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:12,498

Oh, so you're really famous

and important

00:06:12,623 --> 00:06:13,665

but you don't know John Elway.

00:06:13,791 --> 00:06:15,793

Look, little boy,

00:06:15,918 --> 00:06:18,629

I understand that you found a

neat little triangle near here.

00:06:18,754 --> 00:06:19,922

You know what I'm talking

about?

00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:21,256

Yeah...

00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:22,800

No, I found it.

He stole it.

00:06:22,925 --> 00:06:24,635

You threw it away, Cartman!

00:06:24,760 --> 00:06:26,678

I'm not talking to him,

because he's a dirty thief.

00:06:26,804 --> 00:06:29,223

Little boy, does the triangle

have a symbol of two snakes

00:06:29,348 --> 00:06:30,349

joined at the middle?

00:06:30,474 --> 00:06:31,934

Yeah, how'd you know?

00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:34,520

Okay, now this is

very important.

00:06:34,645 --> 00:06:37,481

Where is the Triangle

of Zinthar now?

00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:38,941

Triangle of Zinthar?

00:06:39,066 --> 00:06:40,651

Why do you want to know,

lady?

00:06:40,776 --> 00:06:42,152

I'm not talking to you,

you pissant little hick!

00:06:42,277 --> 00:06:43,529

Whoa, dude!

00:06:43,654 --> 00:06:45,114

Where is the Triangle,

damn it?!

00:06:45,239 --> 00:06:46,657

Aaagh!

00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:48,867

What seems to be

the problemo here?

00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:51,662

Problemo? There's no

problemo, Officer.

00:06:51,787 --> 00:06:54,915

I was just introducing myself

to these charming little boys.

00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:57,000

Nu-uh!

She was being a total bitch!

00:06:57,126 --> 00:06:59,461

Boys, shouldn't you

be in school?

00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:01,797

It's Saturday.

- No excuses!

00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:03,715

Move along, you little

troublemakers.

00:07:07,511 --> 00:07:10,472

Well?!

- Well what?

00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:12,558

You know who I am, don't you?

00:07:14,059 --> 00:07:15,769

Well, you ain't Fiona Apple.

00:07:15,894 --> 00:07:18,147

And if you ain't Fiona Apple,

I don't give a rat's ass

00:07:18,272 --> 00:07:19,481

Argh!

00:07:19,606 --> 00:07:21,108

Hoo! What a bitch!

00:07:21,233 --> 00:07:23,819

[twangy music]

00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:25,779

I guess he's not home,

Leonard Maltin.

00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:27,948

Damn! Then we must look

for them elsewhere.

00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:29,867

Now, come on, man!

What is this all about?

00:07:29,992 --> 00:07:32,327

If Barbara Streisand saw

the same news report I did,

00:07:32,453 --> 00:07:34,163

then those boys

are in grave danger.

00:07:34,288 --> 00:07:35,539

If you were Barbra Streisand,

00:07:35,664 --> 00:07:37,458

where would you be

right now?

00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:39,168

Hmm.

00:07:40,711 --> 00:07:42,754

No, no! I mean where would

she be staying?

00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:46,133

Oh, uh, well, I always heard

that Mrs. Streisand

00:07:46,258 --> 00:07:47,968

had her own $4 million

condominium

00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:49,219

up near the ski slope.

00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:50,721

Where?

- I don't know.

00:07:50,846 --> 00:07:52,347

I-it was just a rumor.

00:07:52,473 --> 00:07:54,349

Damn it, man,

where is your car?!

00:07:54,475 --> 00:07:57,394

[dramatic music]

00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:58,437

♪♪

00:07:58,562 --> 00:08:00,022

He has it, Milo.

00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:01,523

That little bastard has

the Triangle.

00:08:01,648 --> 00:08:03,525

Are you sure?

- I'm sure!

00:08:03,650 --> 00:08:05,611

He knew about the symbol

of Krulock!

00:08:05,736 --> 00:08:07,154

Then why don't we go get it?

00:08:07,279 --> 00:08:08,947

A cop showed up.

He's a clever one.

00:08:09,072 --> 00:08:10,616

I can't blow everything now

that I'm this close.

00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:13,494

Everything must be handled

very carefully.

00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:20,000

How many years has it been,

Milo? 30? 40?

00:08:20,125 --> 00:08:23,921

For so long, I have waited

to find the other triangle.

00:08:24,046 --> 00:08:26,131

And now I am so close.

00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:29,134

The dawn of Zinthar

is close at hand!

00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:31,762

[cackling]

00:08:41,313 --> 00:08:44,191

[suspenseful music]

00:08:44,316 --> 00:08:51,323

♪♪

00:08:57,829 --> 00:08:58,789

[babbling]

00:08:58,914 --> 00:09:00,832

[glass shatters]

00:09:00,958 --> 00:09:02,417

Cartman?

00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:04,211

You scared the crap

out of me, Ike!

00:09:04,336 --> 00:09:05,420

What the hell are you doing?!

00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:07,005

I'm trying to get my tri--

00:09:07,130 --> 00:09:08,131

wait a minute, I'm not

talking to you!

00:09:08,257 --> 00:09:09,633

Ike, will you tell Kyle

00:09:09,758 --> 00:09:11,176

that I was trying to get

my triangle back?

00:09:11,301 --> 00:09:13,178

[babbling]

00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:16,306

Well, Ike, you can tell

Cartman that it's my triangle!

00:09:16,431 --> 00:09:18,392

[babbling]

00:09:18,517 --> 00:09:20,852

Well you can tell Kyle he's a

dirty goddamn son of a bitch!!

00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:23,605

[babbling]

- All right, all right!

00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:25,315

If it means that much to you,

take the stupid triangle!

00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,067

Huh?

- If it'll make you

00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:28,235

leave me alone, then just take

the damn thing.

00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:29,528

Here.

00:09:29,653 --> 00:09:31,530

There. Now get out of my house.

00:09:31,655 --> 00:09:33,615

And I hope you feel really,

really good about yourself.

00:09:34,950 --> 00:09:37,119

Hell yeah, I do.

I got the triangle.

00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:40,080

♪ I got the triangle,

I got the triangle ♪

00:09:40,205 --> 00:09:41,832

♪ You don't, you don't ♪

00:09:43,584 --> 00:09:45,919

Are you sure Barbra Streisand

has a condo up here?

00:09:46,044 --> 00:09:47,588

It was just a rumor.

00:09:47,713 --> 00:09:49,381

A lot of big celebrities

have mountain condos.

00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:51,091

Then we've got to keep

looking.

00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:52,634

[tires screech]

All right, Leonard Maltin,

00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,052

this has gone far enough.

00:09:54,177 --> 00:09:55,679

I ain't driving another mile

00:09:55,804 --> 00:09:57,556

till you tell me what

this is all about.

00:09:57,681 --> 00:09:59,600

Haven't you ever been curious

about the insanity

00:09:59,725 --> 00:10:01,476

Barbra Streisand exhibits?

00:10:01,602 --> 00:10:04,605

Well, I always heard she was

kind of a bitch, but--

00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:06,106

More than a bitch, Chef!

00:10:06,231 --> 00:10:07,107

She's a calculating,

self-centered,

00:10:07,232 --> 00:10:08,942

egotistical bitch.

00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,902

She was born in a small town,

her mother was a jackal,

00:10:11,028 --> 00:10:12,946

and her father was

an insurance salesman.

00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:15,115

[shudders] Ooh.

Insurance salesman?

00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:16,533

When she was five, she knew

that she wanted

00:10:16,658 --> 00:10:17,743

to be a famous singer.

00:10:17,868 --> 00:10:19,411

But by the time she was six,

00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:20,829

her ambitions became

to rule the universe.

00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:21,997

She learned of an ancient

diamond.

00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:23,498

The diamond of Pantheos.

00:10:23,624 --> 00:10:25,584

Okay, you know what?

Never mind.

00:10:25,709 --> 00:10:27,961

I don't need to know all this.

Forget I asked.

00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:29,630

Before she was seven,

the keepers of Pantheos

00:10:29,755 --> 00:10:30,756

learned of this insane little

girl's wish.

00:10:30,881 --> 00:10:32,466

The diamond was split up

00:10:32,591 --> 00:10:34,259

and buried at opposite ends

of the world.

00:10:34,384 --> 00:10:35,969

But then, during the shooting

of "My Fair Lady,"

00:10:36,094 --> 00:10:38,013

Barbra Streisand found

one of the triangles.

00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:40,682

And the other triangle is

the one that little Kyle has?

00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:42,601

Yes, Mr. Chef.

If Babs get ahold

00:10:42,726 --> 00:10:45,062

of that other triangle,

she will fulfill her prophecy

00:10:45,187 --> 00:10:48,649

and become the most threatening

thing ever known to mankind...

00:10:48,774 --> 00:10:50,150

Mecha-Streisand.

00:10:50,275 --> 00:10:51,818

Mecha-Streisand?

00:10:51,943 --> 00:10:54,029

Oh man, I don't know

what the hell that means,

00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:55,989

but it doesn't sound good.

00:10:56,114 --> 00:10:57,991

Man, the bus sure is late.

00:10:58,116 --> 00:11:00,661

Hmmm, I wonder what I should

do with my triangle,

00:11:00,786 --> 00:11:02,871

now that it is my triangle.

00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:05,248

Damn it, Cartman, I gave it

to you so you would shut up.

00:11:08,126 --> 00:11:10,504

Oh, hello there, little boys.

00:11:10,629 --> 00:11:11,963

How are you today?

00:11:12,089 --> 00:11:13,882

Fine.

- That is great.

00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:15,884

My name is Mrs. Jones.

00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:19,012

And I am a very friendly,

nice person.

00:11:19,137 --> 00:11:22,265

I hear that one of you found

my triangle.

00:11:22,391 --> 00:11:23,475

Your triangle?

00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:26,269

Yes. You see, that triangle

00:11:26,395 --> 00:11:28,855

is part of my

kidney dialysis machine.

00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:30,691

I'm so glad you found it,

00:11:30,816 --> 00:11:33,735

because without it, I was sure

to die within hours.

00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:35,529

Oh no, you don't!

Finders keepers!

00:11:35,654 --> 00:11:37,322

But I'll die!

00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:38,865

Well, I guess we'll have

to Roshambo for it.

00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:40,784

I'll kick you in the nuts

as hard as I can,

00:11:40,909 --> 00:11:42,703

then you kick me square in

the nuts as hard as you can.

00:11:42,828 --> 00:11:46,832

I want to give you a big

cash reward for finding it.

00:11:46,957 --> 00:11:49,710

It's worth a lot

of money to me.

00:11:49,835 --> 00:11:51,586

It is?

00:11:51,712 --> 00:11:53,463

Hey, no wonder that Barbara

Streisand lady wanted it!

00:11:53,588 --> 00:11:56,383

Oh, [laughs]. Who is that?

00:11:56,508 --> 00:11:58,260

Oh, just this really,

really old lady

00:11:58,385 --> 00:11:59,970

who wishes she was

still only 45.

00:12:00,095 --> 00:12:01,888

[laughter]

00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:03,557

Yeah, and you should have

seen her nose.

00:12:03,682 --> 00:12:05,225

It was big enough to land

stealth bombers on.

00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:07,769

[laughter]

00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:10,147

Yeah, and talk about a bitch.

I haven't seen--

00:12:10,272 --> 00:12:11,523

Enough!

00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:13,358

Oh. Ha, ha.

00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:16,778

Anyway, if you'll come

with me in my car,

00:12:16,903 --> 00:12:19,614

I'll take you up to my

condo where I'll kill you--

00:12:19,740 --> 00:12:23,201

I mean, uh, give you money

for the triangle.

00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:25,245

Sweet! I'm gonna be rich!

00:12:25,370 --> 00:12:26,955

Bet you wish you wouldn't have

given me back that triangle

00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,957

now, huh, Kyle? Dumbass.

00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:31,042

Wait, isn't there some rule

about not getting into cars

00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:32,586

with strangers?

00:12:32,711 --> 00:12:34,212

No, not when money's

involved, stupid.

00:12:34,337 --> 00:12:36,590

[regal music]

00:12:36,715 --> 00:12:38,633

And action.

00:12:38,759 --> 00:12:40,677

Rebecca, I'm a man.

00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:43,305

A man like any other with

dreams and emotions.

00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:46,141

And that's why I'll never put

a foreign object up my ass.

00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:47,642

Cut. Great. Print that.

00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:49,478

Excellent work, Sid.

Take five, guys.

00:12:49,603 --> 00:12:51,062

Let's set up for

the next shot.

00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:56,359

[voices] Hello.

- Ho?!

00:12:56,485 --> 00:12:58,028

You must hurry.

00:12:58,153 --> 00:12:59,696

A young man has found

the Triangle of Zinthar!

00:12:59,821 --> 00:13:01,615

Where?!

00:13:01,740 --> 00:13:03,700

A small, pissant, white-bread

mountain town in Colorado

00:13:03,825 --> 00:13:04,951

called South Park.

00:13:05,076 --> 00:13:06,661

Excellent.

00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:13,460

Soon, the Triangle of Zinthar

will be mine,

00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:17,756

and I will be the biggest,

most famous person ever!

00:13:17,881 --> 00:13:19,883

[grunts] Let me go!

Seriously!

00:13:20,008 --> 00:13:21,218

Yeah, let us go!

00:13:21,343 --> 00:13:23,094

You fools have no idea

00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:24,971

the powers that you

are meddling with.

00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:29,601

I'll teach you to meddle

with my triangle!

00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:32,145

[screams]

It's not my triangle!

00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:33,814

It's Kyle's!

- Hey!

00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:35,941

Don't try to pass it

back on me, fat-ass!

00:13:36,066 --> 00:13:38,860

[groans] Screw you, hippie!

00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:41,571

Where is the Triangle

of Zinthar?!

00:13:41,696 --> 00:13:43,281

I don't remember!

00:13:43,406 --> 00:13:45,242

Goddamn it, tell her!

I wanna go home!

00:13:45,367 --> 00:13:49,371

Maybe this will help

jar your memory.

00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:50,789

No! Don't!

00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:54,709

♪ There's a place for us... ♪

00:13:54,835 --> 00:13:57,587

[screaming]

Now do you remember?!

00:13:57,712 --> 00:14:01,258

[panting] Damn your black

heart, Barbra Streisand!

00:14:01,383 --> 00:14:03,426

I don't know how much more

I can take, dude!

00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:06,054

All right, you asked for it!

00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:10,058

♪ I'm gonna tell you now... ♪

00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:11,226

all: No!

00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,353

I don't know, man.

00:14:13,478 --> 00:14:16,106

Maybe Barbra Streisand doesn't

have a place up here after all.

00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:18,191

Looks like we'll have to go

to plan B.

00:14:18,316 --> 00:14:19,860

There's a plan B?

00:14:19,985 --> 00:14:22,070

Why the hell have we been

driving around all night

00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:24,114

and day for when

there's a plan B?

00:14:24,239 --> 00:14:26,241

Have you ever heard of

the band called 'The Cure'?

00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,201

Oh, come on.

00:14:28,326 --> 00:14:30,370

Don't tell me The Cure has

something to do with this too.

00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:32,831

No, no. Just the lead singer.

00:14:32,956 --> 00:14:34,499

Aah! Aah!

00:14:34,624 --> 00:14:37,252

Whoa! What's the matter,

Leonard Maltin?

00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:40,380

She's close! She's very

close! I can feel her.

00:14:40,505 --> 00:14:41,923

Where?

- She has the boys!

00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:43,592

T-they're in trouble!

00:14:43,717 --> 00:14:46,970

Oh, fudge!

- Keep going this way, hurry!

00:14:47,095 --> 00:14:50,682

♪ Happiness with you is like

happiness with... ♪

00:14:50,807 --> 00:14:53,059

[all screaming]

Okay, okay!

00:14:53,184 --> 00:14:55,061

I'll tell you where

the triangle is!

00:14:55,186 --> 00:14:56,730

It's inside my shoe.

00:14:56,855 --> 00:14:58,398

Oh, for Christ's sake,

Cartman.

00:14:58,523 --> 00:15:00,358

When's the last time you

changed your socks?

00:15:00,483 --> 00:15:02,485

I suppose your socks smell

like the botanical gardens.

00:15:02,611 --> 00:15:05,947

Finally!

The triangle is mine!

00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:07,490

After centuries of waiting,

00:15:07,616 --> 00:15:11,494

I finally

have the Triangle of Zinthar!

00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:15,665

Now the Diamond of Pantheos

is complete!

00:15:15,790 --> 00:15:17,459

[shimmering tone]

00:15:19,044 --> 00:15:21,755

Sugoi! Kono hi wa!

00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:24,049

Atarashii hajimaru da!

00:15:24,174 --> 00:15:25,342

Ima kara!

00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:28,136

Atashi no namae wa!

00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,722

Whoa, dude!

00:15:33,224 --> 00:15:37,437

MECHA-BARBARA STREISAND DA!

00:15:39,022 --> 00:15:40,440

[howling]

00:15:42,067 --> 00:15:44,027

Dude, this is pretty

fucked up right here.

00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:46,905

[howling]

00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:48,657

Holy crap, Ned!

00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:50,951

That's the biggest goddamn

deer I've ever seen!

00:15:54,245 --> 00:15:55,997

And so just weeks after

00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:57,457

the devastating attack

of mutant genetic creatures,

00:15:57,582 --> 00:15:59,250

zombies, and Thanksgiving

turkeys,

00:15:59,376 --> 00:16:02,003

the town of South Park has

managed to rebuild itself

00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:03,588

once again b--

00:16:03,713 --> 00:16:06,174

[howling]

00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:07,968

Oh, goddamn it, not again.

00:16:08,093 --> 00:16:11,638

♪ [man singing Japanese] ♪

00:16:11,763 --> 00:16:18,770

♪♪

00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:23,650

Mayor, Barbra Streisand is--

- I noticed.

00:16:23,775 --> 00:16:26,152

Call the National Guard!

00:16:26,277 --> 00:16:29,072

Oh, we'll get you, you bitch.

00:16:29,197 --> 00:16:33,118

And to think I actually watched

your HBO special!

00:16:34,953 --> 00:16:36,746

Children!

[together] Chef!

00:16:36,871 --> 00:16:38,373

Oh, no, no!

00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:40,250

She has joined the two

triangles?

00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:42,043

Yeah, she stole my triangle!

00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:45,797

Get us down from here.

- I can't break these locks.

00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:47,924

Stand back, Chef.

00:16:48,049 --> 00:16:49,759

Marutang ray!

00:16:49,884 --> 00:16:51,636

[zapping]

00:16:52,595 --> 00:16:53,972

Whoa, that was cool!

00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:55,598

I've got to go after

Mecha-Streisand.

00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:57,559

Chef, I need you to call

Robert Smith of The Cure

00:16:57,684 --> 00:17:00,353

at this number.

- Robert Smith? Sweet.

00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:03,565

Hello?

- Uh, yes.

00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:05,316

Is this Robert Smith

of The Cure?

00:17:05,442 --> 00:17:07,193

Yes, it is.

- This may sound kinda strange,

00:17:07,318 --> 00:17:10,113

but Leonard Maltin

asked me to call you.

00:17:10,238 --> 00:17:13,158

Oh, so Barbara Streisand's

found the other triangle, eh?

00:17:14,451 --> 00:17:16,327

[dramatic music]

00:17:16,453 --> 00:17:19,039

All right, men. Give her

everything you've got.

00:17:19,164 --> 00:17:20,874

[shrieking]

00:17:20,999 --> 00:17:23,376

[missles blasting]

00:17:24,669 --> 00:17:26,337

[shrieking]

00:17:26,463 --> 00:17:27,797

Get around side her, Ned!

00:17:27,922 --> 00:17:29,674

I can't get a shot in

from here!

00:17:29,799 --> 00:17:31,051

Okay.

00:17:32,844 --> 00:17:35,638

Ah, ah, I'm scared.

00:17:38,141 --> 00:17:39,434

[shrieking]

00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:41,311

♪ [man singing Japanese] ♪

00:17:41,436 --> 00:17:44,689

♪♪

00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:45,899

It's no use!

00:17:46,024 --> 00:17:47,692

Our firepower has no effect!

00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:50,070

Oh, my God, it is you!

00:17:50,195 --> 00:17:53,364

Oh, I am such a huge fan,

Ms. Streisand!

00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:56,076

I never thought I'd live

to see you in person!

00:17:56,201 --> 00:17:57,327

KRAGHGHGH!

00:17:57,452 --> 00:17:59,037

I hate to ask this,

00:17:59,162 --> 00:18:00,538

but could I get an autograph?

00:18:00,663 --> 00:18:02,290

My sister would die!

00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,792

GRAGHGHGH!

00:18:06,544 --> 00:18:08,963

Oh thank you, Ms. Streisand!

00:18:09,089 --> 00:18:10,465

[howling]

00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:12,133

[overlapping screams]

00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:17,222

We're doomed!

Goodbye, Mr. Hat.

00:18:17,347 --> 00:18:20,433

♪ [man singing Japanese] ♪

00:18:20,558 --> 00:18:21,810

Barbra!

00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:23,978

[shrieking]

00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:26,606

Kitte! Kitte! Churi-pu!

00:18:26,731 --> 00:18:30,985

♪ [man singing Japanese]

Leonard Maltin ♪

00:18:34,155 --> 00:18:36,491

[exciting music]

00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:37,909

Look out, children!

00:18:38,034 --> 00:18:40,745

[overlapping screams]

00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:42,664

all: Ahhhh!

00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:45,333

♪♪

00:18:49,129 --> 00:18:50,213

Oh, no!

00:18:50,338 --> 00:18:53,800

[muffled speech]

00:18:53,925 --> 00:18:55,927

Oh, my God,

they killed Kenny!

00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:57,595

You bastards!

00:18:57,720 --> 00:19:00,390

[heroic music]

00:19:00,515 --> 00:19:01,683

What's going on here?

00:19:01,808 --> 00:19:03,226

Sidney Poitier?

00:19:03,351 --> 00:19:05,270

That's right.

I'm Sidney Poitier.

00:19:05,395 --> 00:19:07,772

Damn, man,

it's nice to meet you.

00:19:07,897 --> 00:19:10,775

The Sidney Poitier

in my hometown.

00:19:10,900 --> 00:19:13,486

Barbra Streisand has found

the Triangle of Zinthar?

00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:15,989

Yep, she's made the Diamond

of Pantheos, all right.

00:19:16,114 --> 00:19:17,991

Koora Koo-ra-suki!

00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:21,995

♪ [man singing Japanese]

Mega-Poitier... ♪

00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:27,709

♪♪

00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:29,752

Is that really necessary?

00:19:29,878 --> 00:19:32,755

[exciting music]

00:19:32,881 --> 00:19:39,888

♪♪

00:19:43,391 --> 00:19:44,726

It's over.

00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:46,144

She's too strong for them,

children.

00:19:46,269 --> 00:19:48,062

We'll have to leave town.

00:19:48,188 --> 00:19:49,522

Make it go away.

00:19:49,647 --> 00:19:51,274

I hate Barbra Streisand!

I hate her!

00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:52,901

My mom always said

there were no monsters,

00:19:53,026 --> 00:19:54,402

but there are,

aren't there, Chef?

00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:57,197

We have to say goodbye

to South Park.

00:19:57,322 --> 00:20:00,116

woman: Oh, my God!

Help me!

00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:03,077

[shrieks]

00:20:03,203 --> 00:20:04,996

Am I too late?

- Who are you?

00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:06,581

Dude! That's Robert Smith

of The Cure!

00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:07,957

Sweet!

- Here, you boys

00:20:08,082 --> 00:20:09,250

hold this walkie.

00:20:09,375 --> 00:20:10,460

You can help me find her.

00:20:10,585 --> 00:20:11,920

You can try, Robert Smith,

00:20:12,045 --> 00:20:13,588

but that thing

just beat the crap

00:20:13,713 --> 00:20:15,590

out of Leonard Maltin

and Sidney Poitier!

00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:17,592

I have to try.

00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:20,303

I can't let Barbara Streisand

do this to the entire world.

00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:22,347

[shimmering tone]

00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:24,307

♪ [singing Japanese]

Robert Smith, Robert Smith... ♪

00:20:24,432 --> 00:20:28,186

♪♪

00:20:28,311 --> 00:20:30,772

[high-pitched tone]

00:20:33,691 --> 00:20:35,735

[howling]

00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:39,489

We must tell him that her

weak point is the nose.

00:20:39,614 --> 00:20:42,867

Robert Smith, hit her nose.

Use robot punch!

00:20:45,787 --> 00:20:47,455

[electricity crackling]

00:20:50,250 --> 00:20:51,459

The Diamond of Pantheos!

00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:53,002

She must be powerless now.

00:20:53,127 --> 00:20:55,046

Quickly, Robert Smith.

She's powerless!!

00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:59,175

♪ [singing Japanese]

Robert Smith, Robert Smith... ♪

00:21:01,970 --> 00:21:03,137

[wailing]

00:21:05,598 --> 00:21:06,808

[explosion]

00:21:06,933 --> 00:21:08,268

He did it!

00:21:08,393 --> 00:21:10,645

No more

Barbra Streisand ever!

00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:12,647

Wow, Robert Smith

is the greatest person

00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:13,731

that ever lived.

00:21:13,856 --> 00:21:14,816

Our savior!

00:21:14,941 --> 00:21:16,567

[shimmering tone]

00:21:16,693 --> 00:21:19,404

Can I have my walkie-talkie

back now, please?

00:21:19,529 --> 00:21:22,073

No way. You gave it to us.

It's mine now.

00:21:22,198 --> 00:21:24,617

All right, I'll Roshambo you

for it.

00:21:24,742 --> 00:21:25,743

Ready?

- Huh?

00:21:25,868 --> 00:21:27,662

[groaning]

00:21:29,414 --> 00:21:31,666

Hey, where's he going?

00:21:31,791 --> 00:21:33,334

Goodbye, Robert Smith!

00:21:33,459 --> 00:21:35,586

Thank you for your help.

Visit us again.

00:21:35,712 --> 00:21:38,256

"Disintegration" is the best

album ever!

00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:46,597

Well, what should we do with

the two triangles now?

00:21:46,723 --> 00:21:48,057

We've got to get rid of them.

00:21:48,182 --> 00:21:49,142

Nobody should have

the kind of power

00:21:49,267 --> 00:21:50,935

Barbra Streisand wanted.

00:21:51,060 --> 00:21:52,395

Well, at least I have this

sweet walkie-talkie

00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:53,646

Robert Smith gave me.

00:21:53,771 --> 00:21:54,856

No! That's my walkie-talkie!

00:21:54,981 --> 00:21:56,649

He gave it to me!

00:21:56,774 --> 00:21:58,484

Dammit, Cartman, don't you

ever learn anything?

00:21:58,609 --> 00:22:01,237

Come on, Stan, it's mine.

I'll Roshambo you for it.

00:22:01,362 --> 00:22:02,697

Go to hell, Cartman.

00:22:04,198 --> 00:22:05,950

Well, that whole experience

sure did suck.

00:22:06,075 --> 00:22:08,036

Yeah, I'm sure glad

that's over with.

00:22:08,161 --> 00:22:09,996

But you know, I've

learned something today.

00:22:10,121 --> 00:22:12,206

I've learned that people

who want power, a lot of power,

00:22:12,332 --> 00:22:13,666

always end up dead.

00:22:13,791 --> 00:22:15,668

Yeah.

- Yes, and I've

00:22:15,793 --> 00:22:16,878

something too.

00:22:17,003 --> 00:22:18,463

Robert Smith kicks ass.

00:22:18,588 --> 00:22:20,381

[rumbling]

00:22:20,506 --> 00:22:22,216

Oh, no! She's back!

00:22:22,342 --> 00:22:24,218

Oh, my God! Look!

00:22:24,344 --> 00:22:27,096

[howling]

00:22:27,221 --> 00:22:29,349

[together] Aaah! Mecha-Ike!